Favorite historical fails.

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Turtleboy1017

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Nov 16, 2008
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Battle of Stanlingrad. For every 10 Russians that Stalin threw at Hitler, only about 1 German was killed. The only reason Germany lost the battle was because it was cold as shit, and Russia seemed to have a never ending supply of troops to throw into battle.
 

xChevelle24

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Mar 10, 2009
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The earth is flat. EPIC FAIL
Hitlers repeated attempts to invade 1 city, and failing for 2 years. EPIC FAIL
Scientology. EPIC FAIL
Any military incident where the planes bombed their own troops.
Pearl Harbor (I'm speaking as if this was an epic fail for the Japs)
 

HerrBobo

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Jun 3, 2008
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cordeos said:
HerrBobo said:
Hunde Des Krieg said:
Every Invasion of Russia.
The Mongols were sucussful in invading Russia.
to be fair when the Mongols invaded Russia wasn't really under control of one power and they were used to the same levels of cold
True, but they did over run the major power controling "Russia" at the time.
 

Enosh_

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Aug 27, 2008
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Battle of Watling Street
A woman named Boudica started a uprising against the Romans after, she ralied some 230.000 warriors, the Roman govenour rallyed only his own legion, parts of a second legion and whatever axularies he could get together, a total of 10.000 warriors. Boudica certain of her victory even put all the wagons into a half circle behind her troops and putted the woman and children on them. Well lets say that superiour roman technology, strategy and discipline prevailed again, after the rebels routed they were cut off by their own wagons and a lot of them mercilessly murdered by the romans, some 80.000 dead on the side of the rebels, only 400 romans died

Boudica poisoned herself after that.

yeah preaty big fail, loosing while outnumbering the enemy 20:1
 

zwitterion117

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Jan 28, 2008
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I don't know if this really counts, but Ozymandias:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ozymandias

I love the notion of a mighty king and kingdom reduced to a couple of pillars and a bust surrounded by sand.

On a more historically accurate note, I think it was hilarious when Caesar's troops were so sick of not getting paid that they revolted and demanded to see him before the start of the campaign in Spain. When they told him they wanted their pay, land and to be released from service, he agreed. They felt so bad about abandoning their leader they immediately begged him to let them rejoin with him. That is the power of charisma. And it is also an epic fail for the soldiers.
 

neoman10

Big Brother
Sep 23, 2008
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when the German thought an invasion was coming from farther north later in June


Hitler must of been like

"ShiBech" (the B is meant to be the weird B that makes the double S noise, but otherwise I think it's spelled somewhat like that, correct me if you must)
 

pffh

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Oct 10, 2008
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Ushario said:
The French defence against a German attack relied on the Germans not going around the France/Germany border, in effect relying on another nations border to protect them.

Guess how long that lasted?!
Well to be fair the Germans had Rommel and his so called ghost panzer division sweeping across France.
 

darkless

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Jan 26, 2008
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I shall turn to cracked to answer this Under dogs of war [http://www.cracked.com/article_17232_underdogs-war-6-tiny-nations-that-kicked-ass.html]

It basically lists 6 Countries/factions that where meant to be easy to exterminate but kicked ass and won in the end all of the invaders belong on this list.
 

YuheJi

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Mar 17, 2009
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I believe there are around six hundred plans to assassinate Fidel Castro. Each gets more and more ludicrous, and only a few were actually attempted (and failed obviously).
One example:
The CIA knew that Castro loved scuba diving, so the plan was to find a shell big enough to contain lethal explosives, and paint in bright colors so that Castro would be attracted to it.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2006/aug/03/cuba.duncancampbell2
 

Jerious1154

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Aug 18, 2008
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William Henry Harrison's decision to give a two hour inaugural speech followed by a parade in the middle of the winter in the snow without a coat. He died of pneumonia a month later.
Also, Jimmy Carter being attacked by a rabbit:
http://media.photobucket.com/image/jimmy%20carter%20rabbit/tescosuicide/ALa2/CartersRabbit.jpg
 

soren7550

Overly Proud New Yorker
Dec 18, 2008
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My favorite has to be Operation Gothic Serpent. A complete strategic failure with the loss of 19 American lives and two Black Hawk helicopters taken down by enemy fire. Didn't capture Mohamed Farrah Aidid as originally planed.