Favorite Venture Bros. Quote
- Thread starter Lusperus
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Brock: You could've told me Sasquatch was a dude...
Steve Summers: Eh? What, you couldn't tell?
Brock: Not until I had to.. (shudder) ...shave him.
Summers: What are you, shy? Sasquatch doesn't have anything you haven't seen before.
Brock: (angrily) Sasquatch IS something I haven't seen before!
Steve Summers: Eh? What, you couldn't tell?
Brock: Not until I had to.. (shudder) ...shave him.
Summers: What are you, shy? Sasquatch doesn't have anything you haven't seen before.
Brock: (angrily) Sasquatch IS something I haven't seen before!
"Why is it every time I need to get somewhere, we get waylaid by jackassery?" - Doc Venture
The intro where 21 and 24 hum "Mars, the Bringer of War" is in the top ten moments of television ever. (Hate Floats)
The intro where 21 and 24 hum "Mars, the Bringer of War" is in the top ten moments of television ever. (Hate Floats)
Dean: "Everybody into the black box! It's indestructible!"
Brock: "No way. I love wearing a tux when I kill guys. Makes you feel kinda like James Bond."
Doc. Venture: "This is that ridiculous giant beehive next door to your study, isn't it? You knocked me out and put me in a bag to bring me fifty yards?!?"
Brock: "Boys, you don't want to shoot me. You know me. You know what I'll do to you if you do."
Colonel Gentlemen: "Careful Lad. Those hands of his are strong enough to crush a boulder. Yet delicate enough to crush a butterfly."
We can go on like this for days, honestly...
Brock: "No way. I love wearing a tux when I kill guys. Makes you feel kinda like James Bond."
Doc. Venture: "This is that ridiculous giant beehive next door to your study, isn't it? You knocked me out and put me in a bag to bring me fifty yards?!?"
Brock: "Boys, you don't want to shoot me. You know me. You know what I'll do to you if you do."
Colonel Gentlemen: "Careful Lad. Those hands of his are strong enough to crush a boulder. Yet delicate enough to crush a butterfly."
We can go on like this for days, honestly...
Brock- "After the twist, you'll feel a snap and the body goes ragdoll on you."
Hank- "And that will knock him out... even more?"
Brock- "That will kill him."
Hank- "Do I have to?"
Brock- "Alright, fine crybaby. Tie him up and, I guess, gag him. But at the first sign of trouble I want you to at least break both his knees."
Henchman 24- "Come on! They have one female servicing a large group of males. That implies a species that lays eggs."
Henchman 21- "Oh my God, you're crazy! They're so obviously mammals!"
Henchman 24- "Please! She'd be in estrus 24/7 if she didn't lay eggs."
Henchman 21- "Smurfs don't lay eggs! I won't tell you this again! Papa Smurf has a fucking beard! They're mammals!"
Dr. Henry Killinger- "Your powers are no match for mine, you silly billy."
Hank- "And that will knock him out... even more?"
Brock- "That will kill him."
Hank- "Do I have to?"
Brock- "Alright, fine crybaby. Tie him up and, I guess, gag him. But at the first sign of trouble I want you to at least break both his knees."
Henchman 24- "Come on! They have one female servicing a large group of males. That implies a species that lays eggs."
Henchman 21- "Oh my God, you're crazy! They're so obviously mammals!"
Henchman 24- "Please! She'd be in estrus 24/7 if she didn't lay eggs."
Henchman 21- "Smurfs don't lay eggs! I won't tell you this again! Papa Smurf has a fucking beard! They're mammals!"
Dr. Henry Killinger- "Your powers are no match for mine, you silly billy."
"Orpheus, we're trapped in a cliche. Use your fake, impossible magic to save us."
--Dr. Venture
Not sure what episode this is from, but it's funny as hell.
--Dr. Venture
Not sure what episode this is from, but it's funny as hell.
"Your machine is powered by a forsaken child???!!!"GyroCaptain said:
Brock: So no women and no children...
Hunter: No women, no children! There are rules...separates us from the baddies.
Brock: What if she's a double agent?
Hunter: Nope.
Brock: An assassin?
Hunter: Nope.
Brock: A double agent-assassin who just killed the President?
Hunter: Nonlethal take-down only! The President isn't the President anyway. You know that.
Brock: Oh yeah. Hey what about a...ya know? A lady Dracula?
Hunter: You mean...Le Vampier? Nosferatu?
Brock: Uhh yeah I guess.
Hunter: Undead! Not typically a woman anymore so...you got no beef there. Also fictitious...
Ah, jeez. I've got plenty of them. This show is genius.
Sgt. Hatred: Just thought I'd drop by the ol' Venture Compound and drop off a big ol' basket of "howdy doo"!
Dr. Venture: Dean! Have you been shooting dope into your scrotum? You can tell me! I'm hip!
Dr. Venture: Hank! Stop calling me pop! If these kids find out that their hero has had sex their heads will explode!
Hank: But I wanna show my new friend-
Dr. Venture: This isn't all about you, Hank. These kids wanna see Rusty Venture. Maybe when there's a cartoon called 'The Venture Brothers' it'll be different.
Action Johnny (Johnny Quest): How many you have fathers? Show of hands.
[All of the children, save one, raise their hands.]
Action Johnny: Hey, kid. Why's your hand not up? What, no father? You don't look like Jesus, bro!
Kid: My daddy died. While I was sleeping.
Action Johnny: Oh, well you had a father. So now you're fuckin' free, man! C'mon, I wanna see those hands up! *gasp* Wait a minute. Action Johnny's hand isn't up! Does he not have a father? NO!!! Fathers are loving and caring and protective men, and I don't have one of those! But who cares, man? (breaking down) Who cares, who cares, who cares!? Maybe I did kill the dog! Maybe I was the Lizard Man who stole your precious serum! You loved that serum more than you loved me!! (falling to his knees) FATHER!!!! FATHER!!!!!
[Brock and Dr. Venture watch from a distance.]
Brock: I liked him better when he was strung out. Poor bastard.
Sgt. Hatred: Just thought I'd drop by the ol' Venture Compound and drop off a big ol' basket of "howdy doo"!
Dr. Venture: Dean! Have you been shooting dope into your scrotum? You can tell me! I'm hip!
Dr. Venture: Hank! Stop calling me pop! If these kids find out that their hero has had sex their heads will explode!
Hank: But I wanna show my new friend-
Dr. Venture: This isn't all about you, Hank. These kids wanna see Rusty Venture. Maybe when there's a cartoon called 'The Venture Brothers' it'll be different.
Action Johnny (Johnny Quest): How many you have fathers? Show of hands.
[All of the children, save one, raise their hands.]
Action Johnny: Hey, kid. Why's your hand not up? What, no father? You don't look like Jesus, bro!
Kid: My daddy died. While I was sleeping.
Action Johnny: Oh, well you had a father. So now you're fuckin' free, man! C'mon, I wanna see those hands up! *gasp* Wait a minute. Action Johnny's hand isn't up! Does he not have a father? NO!!! Fathers are loving and caring and protective men, and I don't have one of those! But who cares, man? (breaking down) Who cares, who cares, who cares!? Maybe I did kill the dog! Maybe I was the Lizard Man who stole your precious serum! You loved that serum more than you loved me!! (falling to his knees) FATHER!!!! FATHER!!!!!
[Brock and Dr. Venture watch from a distance.]
Brock: I liked him better when he was strung out. Poor bastard.
Dr. Orpheus (channeling Dean and Hank's spirits): But Hank, no, Hank is quite upset. Rage, I can hear his rage. He calls you a crumb bum. Or maybe a crampon. It?s hard to hear him.
Brock: Isn?t a crampon a little hook for mountain climbing?
Dr. Venture: He?s definitely calling me a crumb bum.
Brock: Isn?t a crampon a little hook for mountain climbing?
Dr. Venture: He?s definitely calling me a crumb bum.
Shore Leave: Oh, and Hunter, Wayland Flowers called, and he wants his Madam back. BOOM!
Col. Hunter Gathers: Yeah? Well, the Village People called, AND THEY WANT YOU TO GO F*CKING KILL YOURSELF, YOU PRANCING BASTARD!
Col. Hunter Gathers: Yeah? Well, the Village People called, AND THEY WANT YOU TO GO F*CKING KILL YOURSELF, YOU PRANCING BASTARD!
Hank saying "The guy from Labyrinth turned into a BUURD!" when David Bowie turned into an eagle.
That had me and my girlfriend rolling for a week.
That had me and my girlfriend rolling for a week.
Col. Lloyd Venture: I'm sorry. I didn't know we were out of options.
Fantômas: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was sarcasm day.
Col. Lloyd Venture: I'm sorry I wasn't aware of your delicate constitution.
Fantômas: I'm sorry you smell like spoiled fruit.
Mark Twain: Fantômas has a point.
Col. Lloyd Venture: How dare you, sir! Why, I smell of freshly cut flowers!
Fantômas: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was sarcasm day.
Col. Lloyd Venture: I'm sorry I wasn't aware of your delicate constitution.
Fantômas: I'm sorry you smell like spoiled fruit.
Mark Twain: Fantômas has a point.
Col. Lloyd Venture: How dare you, sir! Why, I smell of freshly cut flowers!
And one last one for the road....
Henchman 24: What the hell are you doing?
Dermott: I'm givin' you my earth germs! *cough, cough* I'm gonna kill you with my cold. *cough* Die, alien!
Henchman 24: I'm not an alien, dillweed. I'm a henchman! And you're not a Venture Brother. Who the hell are you?
Dermott: I'm Hank's friend.
Henchman 24: Yeah, I doubt that.
Dermott: Would you believe I'm... Brock Samson's long lost son?
Henchman 24: If that were true, I don't think I would have caught you this easily.
Dermott: I couldn't run because ...I had a lighter up my ass.
Henchman 24: Ok, NOW I believe you're Hank's friend.
Henchman 24: What the hell are you doing?
Dermott: I'm givin' you my earth germs! *cough, cough* I'm gonna kill you with my cold. *cough* Die, alien!
Henchman 24: I'm not an alien, dillweed. I'm a henchman! And you're not a Venture Brother. Who the hell are you?
Dermott: I'm Hank's friend.
Henchman 24: Yeah, I doubt that.
Dermott: Would you believe I'm... Brock Samson's long lost son?
Henchman 24: If that were true, I don't think I would have caught you this easily.
Dermott: I couldn't run because ...I had a lighter up my ass.
Henchman 24: Ok, NOW I believe you're Hank's friend.