Favorite Yahtzee Line on Zero Punctuation

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Cptn_Squishy

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Mar 4, 2009
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One of my favourite lines is from GameDamage:

'Sonic...*thwap*...falls in love with...*thwap*...a carton of ice cream'
 

rokkolpo

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Aug 29, 2009
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Otaru Ikari said:
We had something like this before, but eh.

From his Braid Review:
"And you know who I blame for all this? YOU! Yes you! The public! Especially you Adrian! (That probably isn't your name but it was nice to mess with all the Adrians in the world.)"
i loved that one.
 

e2density

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Dec 25, 2009
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"It's like watching someone beat their fists against a wall, then running off to a hospital, before coming back to do it some more...and they used my medical insurance...AND IT'S MY WALL."

-Yahtzee, Resident Evil 5
 

WhiteFangofWhoa

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Jan 11, 2008
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"Don't be fooled by Popcap's cutesy facade; inside they're a ruthless bunch. If gaming were an 80s sports movie Popcap would be the EVIL team, the fabulously spoiled rich kids our ragtag determined heroes defeat in the narrow but heartwarming victory. Sorry this is getting a bit tangental." -Peggle Review

Having been forced to sit through a fair number of these such as Mighty Ducks and Air Bud, I immediately recognized what he was talking about.
 

Twad

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Nov 19, 2009
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From tomb raiders; "Lara handles like a cow in a supermarket trolley". (excuse my poor grammar)
I laughed so hard that day, it was painfully hillarious.

Also, the quotes about "jagged rock country" were funny too.
 

AT God

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Dec 24, 2008
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"Its like cock slapping the Mona Lisa."

Something like that, what episode was that from?
 

tmdude

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Sep 20, 2008
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"Bull, Fucking, SHIT! We didn't lost contact, I was looking at them! They were etc..."

'What the fuck happened to Clive Winston? In his place we have this giggly Jpop creature and you can't play classic rock with that... thing, it's like cockslapping the Mona Lisa'

"As the exasperated Chinese zoo keeper said the the last male panda in the world: FUCK THAT

That is what we call a Dick Move!'

I mean Christ Luke Skywalker was supposed some sort of Force prodigy and all he could do make a lightsaber move after grimacing for a hour, now here's this lad, clearing an entire hallway with a cough

Just to name a few
 

Frankydee

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Mar 25, 2009
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If I remember correctly it was something like: "The combat feels sticky and unnatural and flows like a river of bricks."

and: "The hammer is made out of wank."

Off of the Too Human review.
 

SageRuffin

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Dec 19, 2009
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"Congratulations, you've just received your punishment for not buying Psychonauts.

I'd like to know how you expect gaming to adapt as an art form when people go out of their way to create new and original games, but fuckwits like you never actually buy them because you're too busy inhaling furious amounts of dick."

- Psychonauts

---

"To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, 'No chance, you unreasonable DICKS!'"

- Manhunt
 

ristar200

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Aug 22, 2009
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"I thought i ought to go undercover, drill holes in my head until i was mentally twelve years old, and try out the new flippity gombo spletch"
-Lego Indiana Jones Review
 

jokr2thief

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Nov 22, 2007
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"Then you're in for a kick in the balls. A gentler kick in the balls than most; an extremely pretty, well executed kick in the balls with the best of intentions, but at the end of the day you're still walking funny."

-Bioshock
 

Space Cowgirl

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Oct 21, 2009
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Wow... I have a lot, but here's a few of my personal faves:

- The obligitory "Pants-on-head Retarded" which, I now actually use in normal conversation

- "Boingo Boingo Whoopsie Knickers!"

- "... A rousing game of bullet kerplunk."

- "Go team retard!"

- "It just goes to show you, never stick your dick in a pudding. It may still be good pudding, and you spend all afternoon explaining that, but no ones going to eat it because you STUCK YOUR DICK IN IT!"

- "... The controls feel stiff and unnatural, and there's a dick joke in there somewhere."

There's plenty more, but I can't even remember most of them.
 

brucelee13245

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Oct 25, 2009
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Number 3.. What happened to clive winston he was my favorite character.. numger 4 WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO CLIVE WINSTON YOU PRICKS?! in his place we've got some multi-colored juggle j-pop.. creature and you cant play classic rock with that....thing its like cock slapping the Mona Lisa.

guitar hero 3
 

IanBrazen

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Oct 17, 2008
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SkullCap said:
Everyone who watches Zero Punctuation has to have a favorite line of Yahtzee's. Let's hear them.

Mine:
"All you really need to know is there is a gun that shoots shurikens and lightning, I wish I could make something like that up, it shoots shurikens and lightning it could only be more awesome if it had tits and was on fire."

-Yahtzee from Painkiller Review-
"FUCK YOU"
he had to have said that one time or another.