It must be so hard never to have known your father. I hope you had another male-role-model in your life, if not then you have my sympathize. And I realize it's not the same, but maybe you could talk to your mother if you need reassurance.Thincrust said:
First man-to-man talk with your father.
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I really enjoy talks about stuff like that with my dad, it's one of the things we eally enjoy doing together.Spectrum_Prez said:
My family is also ridiculously open about everything. I can't begin to count the amount of times either my sisters or my mother sat with the breast naked on the dining table discussing some girl issue. (Partly because I tried my hardest to deny that ever happened and block it out from my memory). But still I never really spoke with my family about male-problems and such, I didn't want to talk with my mother or sisters about that kind of stuff, and I've only started to see my father as a man when I myself moved out.Pararaptor said:
Are you me by any chance? Do I have a second online personality that I'm not aware of. That's totally my life and father-son-relation you just described over there. Just chance history and politics to history, politics, physics, chemistry, math and on occasion religion and we're identical.Spectrum_Prez said:
To quote a good friend of mine and the most inspiring person I ever met in real life. "Sure, why not?" (also became my life-philosophy)Marter said:
I've only had one man-to-man talk with my dad, despite me being a girl. It was, of course, the talk. It was pretty funny, actually, since I was eight at the time (my brother was twelve, see, and my dad thought he could do it all at once) and yet still knew more about it than him thanks to an early obsession with pregnancy (I just thought it was cool that people could make people. The whole sexual side of it, that people did it for fun, was a later revelation.) The whole thing went down the drain when he asked if I had any questions and I said, "How does mom feel with her clothes off?" He said, "Fine, thank you," and we never spoke of man-to-man things again.
My dad and I have always had a basically open relationship. We talk about anything and everything, usually with our conversation ending with me feeling just a bit closer to him. Maybe that is because I see him so little, what with my parents being split up.
I think the first time we had a true father-son talk was at a funeral when I was six. The man who died was one of my father's best friends. We sat down in the back row and started talking about death and what happens afterword. He told me, "I could die tomorrow and no one would care, except you." I don't know why it was, but I consider this both the turning point in our relationship and the day my childhood died.
I think the first time we had a true father-son talk was at a funeral when I was six. The man who died was one of my father's best friends. We sat down in the back row and started talking about death and what happens afterword. He told me, "I could die tomorrow and no one would care, except you." I don't know why it was, but I consider this both the turning point in our relationship and the day my childhood died.
Never with my real dad as he fleed from my mom at the first sign of pregenancy...So I would kick in the crotch rather to have a man to man talk...
My stepdad however i never got that chance as he died when i was young...
Yeah...But I guess i would have liked it...
My stepdad however i never got that chance as he died when i was young...
Yeah...But I guess i would have liked it...
My father passed when I was 3 years old.
I have an older brother though. While we don't have man-to-man talks often, he always helps me out.
Unfortunately, I take after him far too much, whether I realize it or not.
I have an older brother though. While we don't have man-to-man talks often, he always helps me out.
Unfortunately, I take after him far too much, whether I realize it or not.
I'm very similar to my dad. We share a lot of interests, we're on a similar intellectual level (he's smarter), and he's very open-minded. So we can have good conversations.
First real man-to-man talk was a few months ago though. Went down to the local pub, had a few beers and talked about our futures, our family, and our situation in life. It was nice.
First real man-to-man talk was a few months ago though. Went down to the local pub, had a few beers and talked about our futures, our family, and our situation in life. It was nice.
Okay, I'll bite. My dad and I don't have really in-depth conversations and I was never given "the talk" beyond a, "you are being safe, aren't you?" remark shortly after I moved out, but...
I'm gay, and came out of the closet (read: was forced out by my parents and the help of a keylogger, which how they came to find out about and managed to get on my computer is beyond me given their nonexistence technological literacy) when I was 13. Mom, having been raised in a very conservative Southern family, flipped her shit. Dad, surprisingly, didn't. So from that point on, dad was my go-to guy for pretty much everything. We never really had any very in-depth talks about me being a poof aside from him wanting me to see a shrink to ensure that it wasn't just a phase or whatever, but to this day if I'm having a rough time with a boyfriend or what-have-you, I go to him because he's the only member of my immediate family I feel like isn't horribly disappointed in me for the fact that I'm not gonna procreate.
So there's my long-winded answer.
I'm gay, and came out of the closet (read: was forced out by my parents and the help of a keylogger, which how they came to find out about and managed to get on my computer is beyond me given their nonexistence technological literacy) when I was 13. Mom, having been raised in a very conservative Southern family, flipped her shit. Dad, surprisingly, didn't. So from that point on, dad was my go-to guy for pretty much everything. We never really had any very in-depth talks about me being a poof aside from him wanting me to see a shrink to ensure that it wasn't just a phase or whatever, but to this day if I'm having a rough time with a boyfriend or what-have-you, I go to him because he's the only member of my immediate family I feel like isn't horribly disappointed in me for the fact that I'm not gonna procreate.
So there's my long-winded answer.
Thank you for making my day.ObliviousGenius said:
As for the original question, all I can think of is when I was having some problems with my focus at college and he sprung a conversation on me about my priorities in life. That was perhaps the least enjoyable, but most helpful, two-hour car drive of my life.
I'm saying this with the highest level of respect possible, but honestly, I was a bit shocked at the responses in this thread. A large portion of the posters ITT have families that have separated and/or fathers that have passed away at an early stage of their lives.
Is there something that I'm not aware of? Is this the status quo? My family's had a pretty rocky past as well, and I've had many disagreements with my own father. But I thought I had it particularly 'hard'. Perhaps this isn't the case..
Is there something that I'm not aware of? Is this the status quo? My family's had a pretty rocky past as well, and I've had many disagreements with my own father. But I thought I had it particularly 'hard'. Perhaps this isn't the case..
Ha ha! My dad's never been much of a talker. When I was 16, he walked into my room, without knocking... I was mid-coitus (fucking) with a girl... He turned and walked out. Later that night he asked me;
"So, she was naked right?"
"Yep"
"You two were... uhhh, right?"
"Um, yep."
"Cool. I wish I was doing that at your age..." (leaves room)
"So, she was naked right?"
"Yep"
"You two were... uhhh, right?"
"Um, yep."
"Cool. I wish I was doing that at your age..." (leaves room)
My father and I discuss music, literature and art. Are those man-to-man talks? I mean, you can have those conversations with anybody, so it doesn't necessarily count. Other than that, we've never talked much. Nobody in my family does.
As for "the talk", my mother walked into my room, dropped a book on my desk and said:"Figure it out yourself" and walked out. It was the shortest, flimsiest excuse for a sex-ed book I've ever seen. Not that it mattered since I never bothered reading it. Condoms good, STDs bad, pregnancy worse. Thanks, Saved By The Bell!
As for "the talk", my mother walked into my room, dropped a book on my desk and said:"Figure it out yourself" and walked out. It was the shortest, flimsiest excuse for a sex-ed book I've ever seen. Not that it mattered since I never bothered reading it. Condoms good, STDs bad, pregnancy worse. Thanks, Saved By The Bell!