Fish & Chips!

[Mister Swift]

You've negelcted to mention the greatest way of eating chips: THE CHIP SANDWICH.

BASK IN IT'S GLORY.

 

[Shoqiyqa]

Funny, the majority of places I get my fish & chips from these days always provide the finished culinary product in the aforementioned container, usually then wrapped in a plain white paper. That's technological advancement for you, right there. Newspapers are old hat.

Not only does the carton allow the food to be safely contained should you suddenly find yourself having to run (be it toward or away from something), it also acts as a makeshift plate of sorts. The fish can be placed in one half, while the chips are stored in the other. This negates the need to dirty any household dishes, should you have ordered in.

Ask your nearest chippy about this exciting new development today!

The polystyrene just doesn't work for me. Apart from amounting to about a week's worth of rubbish all by itself, it doesn't have the right feel. I think the newspaper served to partially dry the food on the way to the park, and the plain paper in between reduced the amount of ink in and fibre adhering to the chips. Sitting on the park bench, eating from a paper nest with our fingers and watching the ducks was definitely the way to enjoy fish and chips.

Funny sight at that bench: small "dog" (possibly a large rat?) on the steps, yapping its silly little head off at all the ducks as they fled ... until the swan came around the corner right in front of it. It swallowed the last "yip" and the swan gave a disdainful sniff, reared up to about eight times the creature's height and then lunged at it. Rat-like thing was last seen hurtling under the park gates into traffic.

 

[mrF00bar]

You bastard, I could murder for fish & chips now but I have no money!

 

[imnot]

Yes, the meal of kings, fish & chips has fed the proud nation of the UK for millions of years (proven by scientific methods of science). There are, however, rules that must be followed.

Yes, rules. The favourite word of the Germans and least favourite of the French. Without these rules the very fabric of time will collapse in on itself, and that would ruin everyone's day.

Rule the first: The fish & chips must be placed in a holding device made completely from paper, not a polystyrene carton, for that way leads to madness. Newspaper is the material of choice, for it is said that the ink of British newspaper preserves and enhances flavour (scientific fact proven through methods of science).


Rule the second: There are only two condiments worthy of such an honour of being dispersed on the holy meal of holiness, salt & vinegar. Only a trained fish & chips fryer knows the perfect method of applying these condiments, but our trained scientists (in the method of science) have an idea.

It is theorised that the vingegar must first be liberally applied on the fish & chips. This will act as an adhesive for which the salt can anchor to in order to release the Flavour of Science[sub]TM[/sub].

The protectors of taste


Any other condiments, in particular, the demon tomato kethchup, will destroy the flavour of the fish & chips, triggering the great food armageddon. This must be avoided or jolly good times will be put to an end.

The enemy


Rule the third: The fish & chips must be consumed with the use of a two-pronged wooden fork. This is non-negotiable.

The eating utensil of kings


By following these three simple rules (proven by scientific scientists to be 100% scientifically proven), you too can enjoy the meal of kings.

Union flag optional

Did you steal this idea fro mnthet troll thread I derailed!
Because if so I demand money!

OT:I lick fish and chips!

 

[Aprilgold]

I love fish and chips, I wonder is tar tar is okay on it?
I never tried, WHY WOULD I DESTROY THE AWESOME IS FISH AND HIS FRIEND CHIPS!

 

[Purplecoyote]

Me and my sister went to visit London a few months ago and I was all psyched about eating some Fish&Chips but then I found out it's baked in peanut oil and I'm alergic to nuts. I was sad.

Also, in Belgium (home of the french frie!), we put almost anything on our fries. Ketchup, mayonaise, piccalilli, meat sauce,... but never vinegar.

 

[robotam]

Damn, talking about fish and chips really brings out people's patriotic side. To bad Northern Ireland's a shite hole.
Apparently we don't even do chipies right, as I've never used a wooden fork.

 

[Magikarp]

You, sir, have made my day.
I salute you & your magnificent thread.

 

[The Arctic Nun]

Had a chipper last night.

Battered sausage supper. It's standard really, but no, I don't understand heathens who COVER everything with Mr. Heinz. Or mayo for that matter...or SALAD CREAM? I mean, COME ON! SALAD? CREAM?

Salt and vinegar for me all the way, beh-beh. Although I've never been to a chipper where they put -just the right amount- of salt on. Too much, too much. I've yet to find my delicate balance.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

I work at a Fish and Chip shop. I approve of this thread, it gets it pretty much dead on. Well done on informing everyone on how true Fish and Chips should be. Well Done.

Tis an honour to be recognised by a great and mighty fryar of Brittania.

Did you steal this idea fro mnthet troll thread I derailed!
Because if so I demand money!

OT:I lick fish and chips!

I have no idea what you're talking about...

>_>

<__>

Yes indeed.


And forget not the trusty comrades, the sausage in batter and saveloys.


Also, putting your hands on the glass after being out in the cold for hours. You remember.




How to identify more upmarket, posh chippies: "Wrapped or open?"

I'm getting misty eyed just thinking about it.

You know you are eating a meal thats far superior to anything else when animals from a 5-mile radius all flock for your Fish & Chips instead of going for literally any number of other food supllies, they all abandon their natural food for the Fish & Chips.

To the people who dont know the effects of Fish & Chips I will explain, if you ever see a person surrounded by a thousand seagulls you can guarantee that person has Fish & Chips.

That's why we're at the top of the food chain.

It ain't our science, or our intelligence.

It's the fish & chips, it holds the power of the gods.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

Me and my sister went to visit London a few months ago and I was all psyched about eating some Fish&Chips but then I found out it's baked in peanut oil and I'm alergic to nuts. I was sad.

Also, in Belgium (home of the french frie!), we put almost anything on our fries. Ketchup, mayonaise, piccalilli, meat sauce,... but never vinegar.

You must have gone to an imposter.

We never cook our fish & chips in peanut oil.

There is still a chance for you comrade!

 

[TheDarkestDerp]

Last time I was enjoying some delicious planks of fish with liberal amounts of vinegar, a friend turned his nose up, whining "What smells like foot?" ...rotten bastard.

Thank you for reaffirming my faith in deliciousness of cuisine.

 

[Spud of Doom]

Kiwi here.
Freaking love fish and chips. Can get a huge feed that fills me up for less than $5 and still be delicious. I do use tomato sauce on the chips most of the time, or just eat them plain, although I should try vinegar.

And paper is the only way to go. Sometimes when I walked home from high school I'd stop at the takeaways on the way home and get $2-3 of chips. They give it to you wrapped in a newspaper pouch which I proceeded to tear the top off and use as a bag.

 

[ZephrC]

I have to say, as an American, that fish & chips are in fact the greatest food ever. I can't quite find a place around here that gets everything right unfortunately, but at least there's a place within walking distance that serves good fish, even if they do drop it on some mediocre fries that they pretend are real chips.

Admittedly I don't eat my fish & chips the English way. Sorry, but I just don't like vinegar. It's tartar sauce all the way for me. Must be a Northwest thing, because I see in this thread that a lot of my neighbors to north do that as well.

 

[Lim3]

You'd die if you had fish and chips in Australia then.

In fact according to your rules our country should be undergoing an apocolypse.

 

[Daystar Clarion]

You'd die if you had fish and chips in Australia then.

In fact according to your rules our country should be undergoing an apocolypse.

You are.

It's called Australia.

 

[TheLiham]

Chippy Snipy

[HEADING=1] So Sayeth the British Isles![/HEADING]

Fun fact; all chippys south of birmingham are considered as chippys for sissy girly men.

This is a lie. Cornwall is south of Birmingham and we are the kings of fish and chips!!

Fish and chips are best with a tiny splash of vinegar and salt. If you're a fat bastard like me you may want a saveloy and battered Mars bar on the side!

Fun fact; I have no idea why I'm defending Cornwall. Fish and Chips is the only good thing about this shithole.

 

[xWestie]

...Thankyou good sir,
now I crave some fish and chips >>; and I have no money D|

 

[Sgt_Jakeman214]

To the OP, I salute you good sir! As a proud Australian, I must inform you that we follow the Best British Tradition in full form Down Under. None of this Tomato sauce on my Fish and Chips bullshit, nor mayo, nor tartar sauce. Just Salt and Vinegar, on freshly battered fish and proper, honest-to-gods chips, thick as ya thumb!

For Science!

For Queen!

For Country!

FOR FISH AND CHIPS!

LONG LIVE THE FISH AND CHIPS!