For 5 minutes, you have the entire world's attention

[CrazyGirl17]

"Attentions world, please try to get along more, and not be so selfish. And for God's sake, STOP OBSESSING OVER CELEBRITIES AND TWEENIE POP!"

 

[StormShaun]

I would walk up to the mike and tap it, and do stupid shit for a minute.

Then I try to convince the world to form a Earth Defense Force, then I would say everything I would want to say for the last minute or two.

 

[Dango]

For 5 minutes straight.

 

[General Vagueness]

I'd go over reasons to not be a jerk (or worse) and why people don't need to listen to me to realize they're true, and close with the importance of learning-- not just typical education, learning of all kinds-- if I'm coming up short on material.

 

[go-10]

"you with hair on your head, you with the nose on your face, you the tall one, you the fat one, you the skinny one, and especially you who needs to breathe in order to not die. Yeah all of you... FUCK YOU!"

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

Five minutes... just enough time to get my robots in position to detonate the entire planet's nuclear arsenal... mwahahahahhahahahahahaha!

EDIT: Oh I suppose I would have to say something like....

"Oh world, those of you who speak english anyway and can understand me... Oh planet full of insects and bacteria fighting for your place on the organism that is Earth. I'm talking about you viral beings called humans... All of you, with your incessant chatter, arguments over who's right, who gets what rights, who sits where on what bus, where your lunch is taken, what time it actually is, who's God is correct, if there even is a God, who's math is perfect. I advise you to take the next 2 minutes after this speech to truly think about what you've done with your life and if you've truly wasted it or not. Because after I'm done speaking..."
*Play a few minutes of nuclear explosions going off because by then my robots have done their work...*

"Goodbye"

 

[Bloodstain]

Play this song (and its video) and hope that everyone understands its message. It would change the world for the better.




Alternative: "XYZ, I love you. Will you marry me?"

 

[esperandote]

I would tap on the mic and say "Is this on?" for 4 minutes and 55 seconds and then i would say "Alright, I have something incredibly important to say ..."

That or i would play One More Time by Daft Punk

 

[Arctarus'sCookie]

I'd get everyone in the world to dance like this, or some of the things people have already posted.

 

[-KC-]

OK PEOPLE !


I have a dream !

 

[James Crook]

I'll start singing an awesome rock song to everybody!
<youtube=Z78PjvfCVTQ>
This will do just well.

 

[Firstmark_Bannor]

May I have the attention of everyone please, I believe it's time we had a little chat concerning the state of things on our Home, Earth...

And thus begun the greatest speech ever given. I'd say everything I ever needed to say. BAM! World peace and massive public orgies.

 

[Roofstone]

I'd pay these guys to do the background music, then I would give a speech so great it'd instantly end world hunger.. That is what I would do!

 

[Palademon]

Advertise myself to women, of course.

And when that fails I can undeniably declare forever alone, and then maybe do a prank, or unite the world with the pokemon theme tune.

 

[Rich Webb]

I would shamelessly plug my band. Gotta be done

 

[FortheLegion]

Do not want.

 

[Febel]

"Hmmm...." *tap-tap* "Is this thing on? Oh good, it is. Attention citizens of Earth: Fuck you all! You're all a bunch of bastards!" *Turns to cameraman* "Did I do well? I think I did well."

And then the remaining 4 minutes 15 seconds would be spent having various translators repeat that message in every currently known language.