Jaime_Wolf said:
DiMono said:
I'm straight, my cousin is gay, and it doesn't matter because it's not like he walks around reminding us about it. Don't hate someone for something they're doing in the privacy of their bedroom, and if they are flaunting it, don't hate them for being gay, hate them for being attention whores. They can't choose who they're attracted to, but the can choose whether to be a dick about it in public.
This popped up while I was posting. This is exactly what I mean. Should I be unhappy if I see you going around "flaunting" being straight? Very likely you don't even know you're acting that way since to you it's just acting "normally". Why on earth should you care if you cousin goes around "reminding" you about it if it doesn't bother you?
maybe it's hard for me to relate since i'm a straight male, but i get the impression that you're taking some of these comments way too personally, but i'm going to make an attempt to relate to you, jamie.
as far as "flaunting" homosexuality compared to "being proud of" it is very different. in my 2nd year of college my one roommate was gay. he'd announce it during the middle of a conversation with new people just to keep it flowing (he even declared himself "the token fag" on some occasions), but from there the conversation would go back to school, music, television, martial arts, plans for seeing friends in town, etc. i never went out of my way to brag about chicks i boned when i talked with him, and he never went out of his way to brag about his boyfriends and the fun times they had. yeah, we talked about relationships from time to time, but it was more interesting hearing his story than if he just went "i'm so proud to be gay because of ... " to me, that's someone who's comfortable in their skin no matter what the outside world thinks of him. that's being proud.
however, one night he invited a new boyfriend and his mother to our house for dinner. everything was great until after dinner. my roommate and his friend just randomly started making out in front of me and his boyfriend's mom as they slowly made their way back to his room, leaving me to house-sit his bf's mom while they went away to have sex. this is definitely what i would consider "flaunting", and above all, it's just rude. we had an argument about that later in the night, where i basically told him "how would you like it if i brought a girl over, fucked the shit out of her half the night, and left you to babysit her dad?"
now, to be fair, i was notorious for pulling similar stunts with women when i was a teenager. doorways, hallways, parties, concerts, public parks (okay, that was only once), i loved flaunting the fact that i had a woman with me because i was more used to being alone. but over time i learned that no-one really wants to see my naked ass, and more than anything, it made the women really uncomfortable being so exposed in public! even the simple act of kissing in public makes them uncomfortable unless it's just one little peck on the lips, anything more is too much. even seeing other straight couples kissing in public makes me uncomfortable. so, i dialed it back, and now i save the rest for behind closed doors. i was being just as rude then as my roommate was that night.
so the moral of the story is: flaunting is irritating, no matter who you're taking home.
now in terms of media and advertising, for the most part i agree with you, hands down. there's a lot of emphasis on heterosexual desire, especially in top 40 pop music (though katy perry sure took a shot at breaking it with "I Kissed a Girl") and almost every tv commercial known to the human race. though i agree the proportional emphasis is completely out of whack, i'm gonna take a stab at why that might be, and i'd be more than happy to hear your feedback on this:
-advertisers jump at the largest possible audience they can find. since they know (depending on the product) that their largest audience will either be a straight male or a straight female, they target the sex appeal towards those desires. as well, there's sort of a natural reaction straight people tend to have toward homosexual desires, which if made blatant enough are rather off-putting (i don't label this a choice as more of an impulse, like a scene that makes you jump in a scary movie--and no, i'm not trying to compare homosexuality to scary movies, i'm-- just-- digging myself a hole here, so i'll get back to the point). i think though, even within the hetero mind, there are still some semblances of homosexual desire. take body wash/lotion commercials, for instance: oil of olay, dove, hell, even old spice fits this example of a product aimed at a particular gender, promoted by a half-naked person of the same gender! the way the ads are structured too (old spice is a better example than the others) are clearly aimed toward straight people ("hello ladies how are you doing today fantastic i am the man that your man could smell like"), but whether this is an influence of sexual desire or to perpetuate the ego of that particular gender is anyone's guess.
-music is written by a number of diffent styles of people with a number of different sexual preferences (confirmed & rumored homosexuals: elton john, 4 non-blondes, trent reznor of nine inch nails, boy george, rick atsley, isis, the village people, some members of propaghandi, a lot of gangsta rappers are apparently closet homosexuals, that is if you believe youtube comments--i think i'm digging myself a hole again, back to the point ... ), but again, as far as advertising and distribution of said music, people will market what they think will get them the biggest possible audience. unless it's kept subtle enough that most people don't catch it right away (like "Lola" for instance, or almost every song from the 60s and 70s regarding drug use [i couldn't think of another song off the top of my head]), anything that might come across as too blatantly, for lack of a better term, "gay", it might not turn out so well. is it fair? no. is it true? from what i've seen, yes.
this video is billy squier. i've gotten into his music a bit more over the last year or so, but this video killed his career, and according to a lot of people, ruined a perfectly good song. i don't remember how to embed video, you'll have to copy & paste the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fR0j7sModCI
