Gentlemen, Is chivalry dead?

[Kortney]

My boyfriend has always opened car doors for me and held my hand as I walk up steps. Lots of it isn't needed, I mean I can walk up stairs without support just fine, but it's sweet and it makes me feel good. It shows he cares. I like chivalry.

 

[Serenegoose]

My boyfriend has always opened car doors for me and held my hand as I walk up steps. Lots of it isn't needed, I mean I can walk up stairs without support just fine, but it's sweet and it makes me feel good. It shows he cares. I like chivalry.

I do think there's a tangible difference between doing it to make someone feel special, and doing it simply because of their gender. It might not be easy to codify, but it's definitely there.

 

[MadeinHell]

My boyfriend has always opened car doors for me and held my hand as I walk up steps. Lots of it isn't needed, I mean I can walk up stairs without support just fine, but it's sweet and it makes me feel good. It shows he cares. I like chivalry.

I do think there's a tangible difference between doing it to make someone feel special, and doing it simply because of their gender. It might not be easy to codify, but it's definitely there.

Now let's not look too much into every socially acceptable way of respecting someone (like letting females go into a room first etc. etc.). We do know there are some... hmmm... structural differences between us . And that's it, being nice to a woman because you are a man does not make you sexist. That is just the way you were raised.
CALLING somebody sexist for that on the other hand. Oh hypocrisy arises.

 

[archvile93]

Chivalry is just disguised chauvanism. I hope it dies. You shouldn't be polite to somebody because they're a woman, you should be polite to everybody who's not an asshole because it's the right thing to to do.

You're off but I understand what you're saying. Chivalry was more a code guided towards a knight, someone of great power and stature, using both for the benefit of the poor and downtrodden. It wasn't all about women. Chivalry was as much a guide to using your power for good than anything else. A Chivalric Knight was a knight who used his abilities to protect those who could not be protected, to safeguard those who were threatened, and if need be die to save innocents. The respectful treatment of women was just one of the many facets of the chivalric code.

-To fear God and maintain His Church
-To serve the liege lord in valour and faith
-To protect the weak and defenceless
-To give succour to widows and orphans
-To refrain from the wanton giving of offence
-To live by honour and for glory
-To despise pecuniary reward
-To fight for the welfare of all
-To obey those placed in authority
-To guard the honour of fellow knights
-To eschew unfairness, meanness and deceit
-To keep faith
-At all times to speak the truth
-To persevere to the end in any enterprise begun
-To respect the honour of women
-Never to refuse a challenge from an equal
-Never to turn the back upon a foe

That is a true chivalric code. As you can see, the respectful treatment of women was but one small facet of the code itself. If one wishes to decry Chivalry they must decry all facets. Some are not totally necessary anymore in today's day and age, for the most part the religious facets. However, the code still stands.

How many knights actually followed that thing? If the history texts I read are accurate, knights were no better than common thugs.

 

[Something Amyss]

I hope it's dead, since it's a set of rituals derived from the notion that women are property. If you want to be nice, go for it. But chivalry should remain in those times where women were not allowed to say "no" to you.

 

[Vampire cat]

No,

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

To quote Dave Chapelle:

"Chivalry is dead and Women killed it"

For the most part, I agree. When it comes to the ladies I am nothing but the proper gentleman. I open doors, I rise when they leave, I take my hat off when I'm in their presence, I say my please and thank yous and do I get any respect? NOOOOOOOOOOOO. Doesn't deter me but it would be nice to have just a little appreciation.

 

[Painful illusion]

I dont believe Chivalry is dead per se..but more on the verge of extinction. There are less people willing to behave like gentleman and less parents are passing these values on to their son to keep the cycle going. Some women or even men may find it odd when one displays an ac of chivalry. For example, I used to have an girlfriend who wasn't used to chivalry at all so she was uncomfortable with me opening car doors, holding her books to class and many other acts of kindness. But I couldn't let that stop me and no one else should stop being chivalrous just because the worlds morals are slipping. Be the one that slows or even reverses the affect.

 

[Joshimodo]

It isn't in my presence.

 

[Hairetos]

I hope it's dead. I don't like treating any group better than anyone else, so...yeah.

The concept never went well with me.

 

[Serenegoose]

To quote Dave Chapelle:

"Chivalry is dead and Women killed it"

For the most part, I agree. When it comes to the ladies I am nothing but the proper gentleman. I open doors, I rise when they leave, I take my hat off when I'm in their presence, I say my please and thank yous and do I get any respect? NOOOOOOOOOOOO. Doesn't deter me but it would be nice to have just a little appreciation.

If I met you, and always stood on one leg around you, would you show me appreciation or respect for my actions in your presence? To be completely honest, I think many women would find your actions around them just a little 'odd'. If someone always stood up when I went anywhere I'd wonder why they were doing it.

I mean, I'm not trying to be insulting here, just trying to illustrate how you might be perceived by others.

 

[Gutkrusha]

I have no idea, really. I've been insulted by women for opening the doors for them, as well as not opening the doors for them. Women also seem to get angry with me if I call them Ma'am. I don't know when that became an insult. I'm sorry ladies, but if you're a good 10 years older than me, I was brought up to call you Ma'am.

 

[bsga22]

I once had a lady stop and say "oh so just because i'm a woman you need to hold the door for me." she got me on a bad day because I turned and said "no I just didn't want people to think I would treat a ugly women poorly." But on a kick ass note a old lady gave me a dime (10 cents) for holding the door for her.

 

[neoontime]

I support feminism but I also consider myself a very chivalrized person. Yes, very civalrized indeed.

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

To quote Dave Chapelle:

"Chivalry is dead and Women killed it"

For the most part, I agree. When it comes to the ladies I am nothing but the proper gentleman. I open doors, I rise when they leave, I take my hat off when I'm in their presence, I say my please and thank yous and do I get any respect? NOOOOOOOOOOOO. Doesn't deter me but it would be nice to have just a little appreciation.

If I met you, and always stood on one leg around you, would you show me appreciation or respect for my actions in your presence? To be completely honest, I think many women would find your actions around them just a little 'odd'. If someone always stood up when I went anywhere I'd wonder why they were doing it.

I mean, I'm not trying to be insulting here, just trying to illustrate how you might be perceived by others.

touche. Though I admit, that one is basically at dinner functions or dining. Still a thankyou when I hold the door open would be nice. And yes I would show respect if you stood on one leg, that shits hard for prolonged periods.

 

[Serenegoose]

touche. Though I admit, that one is basically at dinner functions or dining. Still a thankyou when I hold the door open would be nice. And yes I would show respect if you stood on one leg, that shits hard for prolonged periods.

Yeah, it was a bad example. If I even had the balance to stand on one leg for any time that'd be an achievement. I mean really, it'd pop up in the bottom right of my vision and everything. Course you would show respect then. WHO WOULDN'T?!

And I always thank people who hold doors for me. I dunno, maybe the circumstances differ? Like people who hold the door for me, they've just used it themselves, and instead of letting it slam shut on me, they just hold it open for a bit. It's a courtesy, it's nice of them, I thank them for it and return the favour should the situation be reversed. I think if some white knight was to charge up out of nowhere just to open the door my reaction would be more like....



...wat.

 

[Cid Silverwing]

It exists in proper tf2 servers these days, if you ask me.

Wearing 3 hats stacked on top of each other doesn't make you a gentleman. Nor is wearing a medal.

OT: Chivalry died forever ago indeed.

 

[IkeGreil29]

See, women sometimes act in irrational ways. You think that because you are treated differently, you are suddenly inferior? Holy shit.

And also, do you REALLY want to be treated like a man? Nipple twists, indian burns, insults, talking through your ass, and all that? Because several times that ens up in "men are disgusting idiots".

And to answer the "if it were a man", well, personally, I would consider his status first. If he was an old man, then hell, I'd offer him my seat if all others were occupied, I'd treat him with respect and help him in any other way. If he were crippled, then I would also be chivalrous. It doesn't mean they're inferior; they're just under different circumstances.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying a woman is comparable to an old man/woman or a cripple, but it's just being polite and I'm not going to push that woman into accepting it. 80% or more of the time that I offer my seat to a female of around my age, my offer gets turned down, and I just sit back down. I dun care if they melt for me afterwards or if they think I'm an ass, I'm just not built up to treat women as social equals. They don't even have to thank me, I know that when God or whatever high power judges us or even if there isn't an afterlife I will have done something good with my existence I can be proud of.

 

[Kortney]

My boyfriend has always opened car doors for me and held my hand as I walk up steps. Lots of it isn't needed, I mean I can walk up stairs without support just fine, but it's sweet and it makes me feel good. It shows he cares. I like chivalry.

I do think there's a tangible difference between doing it to make someone feel special, and doing it simply because of their gender. It might not be easy to codify, but it's definitely there.

I know you're right but even when it has happened to me just because of my gender I think it is nice. Last week a 90 year old man opened the door of a shop open for me and his arms were struggling. He wasn't even going into that shop, he saw I was and walked over. It was really touching I thought.

I don't see what's wrong with it.