Girl gamers and their boy issues.

[Ickorus]

The biggest problem with us gamers is that we often hide the fact that we love playing games, we need to be more open about it and perhaps all us lovely gaming guys and girls will have an easier job finding each other!

And OP, keep talking about Mass Effect, soon enough you'll find a bloke who'll love games as much as you do.

 

[derdeutschmachine]

took me years to find the right gamer girl for me... though she is across the damn country. oh well we make it work the best we can.

 

[Kl4pp5tuhl]

Whining and talking about it on a forum won't help. Get out there, be positive and go to societies/events/places where you're likely to run into other gamers and be able to talk. I'm single, but from doing this i've met a ton of girl gamers - most are taken, weird or not interested, but there will always be new people pouring in, and at least you're doing something about it and trying.

What societies/events/places do still exist where that can happen? Also, social skills, not my best of qualities.

*Lives alone. With a cat. Obviously.

 

[KjellKanon]

I don't know about the rest of you, but if some random girl came up to me at a party and started talking gaming, I'd be down with that completely.
Sharing my passion with a significant other is something I'd want out of life. Too bad there's not many of those "gamer girls" around where I live.

 

[thecatsme0w]

never had this issue with guys being I am gay but have with girls but I got lucky and married me a gamer geek girl who plays more games than me lol

I'm confused. You are girl whos married to a gamer geek girl?

Sounds like it to me!! Grats Blood Countess!

 

[UnendingLight]

I figure it has already been said in this thread, but I think sex isn't really a part of this, it's just gamer vs non-gamer. It's like they fear us.

As they shou- I mean... I just need a hug.

 

[Zhadramekel]

So yeah. I noticed there are bizarrely many topics about gamers(male) having problems with getting girls.

Just wanted to say it's not all that easy for girls either. (sadly)
I'm a gamer girl.. And yeah for me that hasn't worked out at all. Maybe it's just the lack of male gamers in my environment. But I wonder if more girls have been experiencing this problem.

For instance you're at a party talking to a nice guy... And realize you've ended up talking about Mass Effect. And the guy is like: Riiiiight... *backs off*
It's funny how non gaming guys are just as freaked out as girls... Oh well. Just curious after thoughts, and if more girls have experienced this problem.

Believe me I can relate. It's probably cos interests in gaming these days has taken a backseat to getting drunk and eating pizza you found on the ground at 4 in the morning

 

[Ambi]

Some are freaked out, some are impressed. Meeeeh. More are impressed than freaked out, however a lot of the time even if they're impressed they might see it as un feminine.

I don't. Most people don't.

I remember finding out my Ex was a massive gamer who wanted to get into WoW and LOVED Fallout 3 a few weeks after we broke up...

I'm amazed at how willing I suddenly was to try and reconcile with her.

And I'm also currrently amazed at what a dick that last sentence made me look. >_<

OH HAY DID I MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE GAMES TOO ;D

[sub]Sorry...[/sub]

OP: I tend to gravitate towards gamer types for some reason. Playing more games would help rather than hinder my social life, strangely enough. It would've helped me relate to friends more if I was somewhat up to date with the games they talked about rather than being like "I just downloaded Portal for free on steam in 2010, am I cool now? lol anyone used to play AoE? I still play it <_< How about Alpha Centauri? ...You don't play games from 1999? Well I only had the demo but it was pretty good." I did (almost) make friends with a guy through starting a conversation about RuneScape some years ago.

 

[Dingo John]

I game a lot, and I am not afraid to mention it in public (I know some people who are).

But I have found that it is to my advantage that I do not play WoW, because that is the most iconic, nerd-game EVER !!! (No, I don't really think so but the public does)

Also, I havent slept for about 40 hours, and I am putting my final stroke on my preparations for my final exam tomorrow. I am done !!! 19 years old and I am going to get drunk as hell, and then do nothing for 2 months except getting even more drunk.

 

[Bloodfeat]

all the "gamer girls" ive met seem to have a male counter part as it were.

this is because gamer girls aren't "available" for very long. has to do with the whole "omg its a girl gamer!!! must get before the other alpha-nerds get her" mentality... and yes there is a hierarchy in Nerd-Dom.

yeah ive seen the hierarchy as well
it seems to revolve around who is better at starcraft, HON, who won the last lan.
but the "Alpha nerds" are not the ones with the women.

 

[Dan From Aus]

This kind of thing is the same across the board - there are just more guys making threads on the Escapist, I guess. =)

If you think about it, it's not really even unique to 'gamers' - if you start geeking out about anything, it's a toss-up as to whether the person you're talking to (chatting up =P) will engage or escape.

The payoff for geeking out openly and honestly is that if the person you're talking to *does* share your interests, then you hit an immediate connection. If you want someone who is into gaming, then you're away laughing.

I'm not explaining myself very well, but what I'm trying to say is that you should just keep on trying, and don't hide your gamer-ness; it's what will attract the kind of person you're (presumbaly) looking for =)

Agreed. 'Geeking' out is not exclusive to geeks, nerds and trekies. If someone really dug the religion they are in, and just blushed about a certain aspect for 30 minutes, people will either connect or walk away. Any topic someone is passionate about. You've just got to throw that stuff out there and hope someone responds positively.

 

[dex-dex]

well I do sometimes feel alienated when I do meet some guys but I do meet some amazing guys . I don't bring it up unless they do first and usually after they are really interested in me being a freaking nerd and pretty but I have more flings than actual relationships which I am ok with because I would be a horrible girlfriend(actually the longest I was ever with a guy in a relationship was two months yeah pretty sad track record)
I do know girls who are gamers but I know they are straight and are not interested in being curious which I can understand not everyone is going to be exploring.

 

[Low Key]

I guess I'm different than other gamers. I don't have a problem with the opposite sex even being a massive computer nerd. I used to, but that was because I didn't actively assert myself.

Or maybe I'm just that fucking sexy now. One may never know.

Sorry ladies, I just don't believe that you have that hard of time finding a guy, you know, considering we're the ones who have to take initiative. Just don't act batshit insane and you'll do fine.

 

[Ba22crow]

The fact that you even mentioned that you are a "gamer girl" sickens me. Maybe your problem lies somewhere else, I mean I don't fucking say that I'm a gamer guy. You don't need to label yourself like this, people watch movies, they read books and they sometimes play videogames... My guess is that you're not exactly a 9/10 and you still insist on hitting good looking guys who are way over your level.

And besides, I don't think you "ended talking about mass effect", because that would mean the guy was into that too. It wasn't a natural part of a conversation. You just said that you like Mass effect didn't you OP? No wonder you have such shit luck, you don't talk about videogames with fratboys.

wow thats a lot of hate. I'm sorry for your stress levels and blood pressure. dude some people are'nt into a broad level of things. I will openly proclaim I am a gamer guy, its who I am, I have a lot to do with the gaiming idustry, and it is a primary force in my life. she spoke perfect sense to me so i know she did to some other people. I would go about finding a gamer girl in a similiar way, so her approach was not wrong either; looking for similiar interests is actually a good way of finding compatability last I checked. kinda means you won't both stare at a wall together bored if you meet. but she did make one mistake, video games and frat boys, you scored big on that. what is a gamer girl doing with frat boys....

 

[jacobythehedgehog]

I think the oposite, I cant find girls or anything like that. I am content now with being single, but where I'm from I dont know any girls that game, and I don't really game online to meet them either

 

[Ulixes Dimon]

Oh, I wish I could find a girl I could discuss Mass Effect with! Yeah, it's just the stigma gaming still unfortunately carries with it for all those who don't understand our shared hobby. Male and female gamers alike are thought of as "a bit weird" by their contempories. Be yourself, and you won't have any problem attracting a nice gamer lad.

Haha I've driven my room mate insane with mass Effect... xD I'd say it's one of my favourite games... But I guess I could say that about most Bioware games... So I'll just say that I really like Bioware games
Yes but the trick is to FIND a nice gamer lad There is one nice lad working in my local game store... But eh... No courage 8D

Shame! This is why it's hard for either gamer sex to find a good partner. They never actually ask out the ones they really like. Advice for everyone here, more people like you than you think, this is almost universal unless you are fairly conceited
So go do it!!!

 

[Ulixes Dimon]

The biggest problem with us gamers is that we often hide the fact that we love playing games, we need to be more open about it and perhaps all us lovely gaming guys and girls will have an easier job finding each other!

And OP, keep talking about Mass Effect, soon enough you'll find a bloke who'll love games as much as you do.

....I tried to wipe your avatar off of my screen XD

 

[Wereraccoon]

I'm just curious, though. Did you ask him whether he plays games and whether he'd heard about the Mass Effect franchise before you started talking about it? Because if not, then what possessed you to talk about it until you weirded him out? If I approached a girl and she started talking about a media franchise about which I had no idea, I'd sit there and listen and ask questions for a while before I bolted. You must've gone on for a bit.

Well actually.. He asked me what my hobbies where. I told him I gamed a lot. He asked what games I played, I told him that right now I mostly play Mass Effect. He hadn't heard of it, and asked what it was about. Now I'm horrible at giving short versions x'D
But yeah he hadn't apparently expected me to play something more than... I don't know. Either way... Yeah fucked up xD

 

[gundamrx101]

So yeah. I noticed there are bizarrely many topics about gamers(male) having problems with getting girls.

Just wanted to say it's not all that easy for girls either. (sadly)
I'm a gamer girl.. And yeah for me that hasn't worked out at all. Maybe it's just the lack of male gamers in my environment. But I wonder if more girls have been experiencing this problem.

For instance you're at a party talking to a nice guy... And realize you've ended up talking about Mass Effect. And the guy is like: Riiiiight... *backs off*
It's funny how non gaming guys are just as freaked out as girls... Oh well. Just curious after thoughts, and if more girls have experienced this problem.

I'm Commander Shepard and that's my favorite discussion on the Citadel.
OT: I've noticed whether it be guys or gals, it seems asking for awkward moments to bring up video games. I get it all the time when I even make a game reference. It's okay though, for people to make a GTL joke, or talk about reality tv shows; talk about a video game? Crickets chirp, wind blows and someone encounters a wild pokemon.

 

[Wereraccoon]

Why do people think we have to identify ourselves as 'gamers'?

If you really can't find anything else to talk about apart from games, it's not surprising people back off. Because that's pretty sad. You have to know who you're talking too, what are they interested in?

Getting into a random conversation and talking about games as if they're your only interest is obviously going to put them off.

Fuck, I love me some game fun, but if you really had nothing else to talk about. I'd be bored too.

Try broadening your interests a little.

You can't go wrong with books and films. Maybe a smidge of philosophy or pop science. Current affairs, politics.

Fuck, you can even scrape the bottom of the barrel and talk about celebrities... but that's not something I've been forced to resort too.

Picking up a paper now n then doesn't hurt you. And you'll have a lot more to talk about next time you're trying to chat up a non-gamer.

Know your target.

Eh games is not the only thing I talk about x'DD I actually know a lot about current affairs and politics (And art and theatre) because I always listen to the news channel when I work. And I've learned not to talk about games. But I can't help it when people ASK about the games I play. It's just.. Then I end up giving my way too long explanations -.- I should stop telling about story lines and how interesting they are.. and maybe just go into the technical details to explain in short what makes the game special and interesting... It would be a whole lot shorter than a hand full of details that I like personally.