Girlfriends (boyfriends) and getting them.

[Mimssy]

A series of cupcakes and tacos leading to a giant trap!

I like a smart guy, caring, has a good sense of humor (he doesn't have to be funny, as long as he likes to have a fun time), someone who knows when to be serious, someone who is personable (that can confident, outgoing, whatever), empathetic, will let me independent, and won't talk down to me.

 

[ALuckyChance]

Well, I'm a rather self-deprecating bastard (see what I did there?), so I'm not very good on the confidance front.

To me, there's two different ways to ask someone out. If you like him/her, then go for it. If you wake up one morning suddenly feeling like you could barely live without him/her, then that's a different matter entirely, and one I can't really answer.

 

[PolarBearClub]

Theironbat, I'd say go for it. We're all going to have missed opportunities that we regret, but don't let her be one of them! It can be hard to tell if a girl likes you most of the time. What's she like, is she touchy-feely with anyone/everyone/just you? I know some girls who to someone on the outside may appear to like a certain guy, but it's just the way they are. Think you've gotten any signals she feels the same way about you?

First step might be to ask someone else in the group, preferably another girl, if you might have a chance (though make sure she's not going to go straight to this girl and tell her how you feel).

 

[Lust]

Don't lie to get somewhere with someone. It hardly ever works.

Also, rejection is better then wondering what could have been.

 

[Talson]

Yeah... All of my girlfriend's always put the moves on me first. The only advice I can give is don't look, they'll find you. Not really helpful, sorry.

 

[theironbat46]

Okay I need some tips. I really like this girl. We are really good friends. We have an entire group of friends around seven people. We go to the movies many times. Maybe even this Saturday.. We have a lot of stuff in common [Comic Books, Jokes, Television, etc.] We have shared lots of awesome moments. That time we all saw Iron Man 2. I sat next to her, we talked the whole time. It felt like a date. The last movie we saw [Eclipse, she liked it I heard The Last Airbender sucked ass.] So all our friends left and we just sat on the bike rack [My parents make me wait till everyone leaves so no one is abducted] and talked. It was great. But she never responds to my text, but she used to in the spring. Also she might have a crush on my best friend. So you have an idea of how much I like her, and my reasons for being so nervous. Should I ask her out at The Other Guys [this Saturday] or Scott Pilgrim [for a romantic tune] ? Or at all? Please advice.

I wouldn't take her not replying to your sms to seriously. Maybe she's like most of my friends who never reply to sms.
Has she told you she has a crush on your best friend? If not you could test it by asking your friend to come along and see how she reacts.
Honestly, don't ask her out. Make sure you sit next to her during the next movie and try holding her hand. Worked for me.
Good luck! Even if she doesn't like you back try going out with her best friends. Also a great way to seek revenge.

Thanks! We actually held hands at Iron Man 2, but it started as high five and lasted for maybe 7 seconds. My best friend is also has girlfriends many times of the year so I usually try a make advances there... I wouldn't try the revenge thing though. We are all really tight, and I don't want to exclude all my friends over a girl who MIGHT like me.

 

[Free Thinker]

Yeah... All of my girlfriend's always put the moves on me first. The only advice I can give is don't look, they'll find you. Not really helpful, sorry.

Only problem; society suggests that the guy makes the first move. So if the girl makes the first move, it's very rare. And with statistics, next to never happening.

 

[MP3zilla]

The key to any long term relationship is to trust, both in yourself and your partner; communication is paramount to a strong foundation in a relationship, you should be able to tell your partner anything(and vice versa); don't take life with your partner too seriously, never forget to laugh; when times are hard, persevere for each other; your partner should be your best friend, you should always be able to lean on each other equally or one in partnership.

I have been with my fiancée for 7 years now and I patiently searched for the person I could spend the rest of my life with. I waited till late in the game to have sex and even kiss, focus more on personality; looks are great, but with an incompatible personality, it can never work. Not to mention the personality will long outlast the looks. As for who you should be, you should always be yourself. You should also look for someone who's humor matches your own or can at least learn to enjoy each other's brand of humor. My fiancée and I are very happy together, and are looking forward to kids. Kids are another story. Remember the vows are usually through sickness and health, and until death, though there is NOTHING wrong with getting a divorce, again kids are another story there.

Sorry to ramble, hope this helps.
MP3zilla

 

[hyperhammy]

Okay I need some tips. I really like this girl. We are really good friends. We have an entire group of friends around seven people. We go to the movies many times. Maybe even this Saturday.. We have a lot of stuff in common [Comic Books, Jokes, Television, etc.] We have shared lots of awesome moments. That time we all saw Iron Man 2. I sat next to her, we talked the whole time. It felt like a date. The last movie we saw [Eclipse, she liked it I heard The Last Airbender sucked ass.] So all our friends left and we just sat on the bike rack [My parents make me wait till everyone leaves so no one is abducted] and talked. It was great. But she never responds to my text, but she used to in the spring. Also she might have a crush on my best friend. So you have an idea of how much I like her, and my reasons for being so nervous. Should I ask her out at The Other Guys [this Saturday] or Scott Pilgrim [for a romantic tune] ? Or at all? Please advice.

I wouldn't take her not replying to your sms to seriously. Maybe she's like most of my friends who never reply to sms.
Has she told you she has a crush on your best friend? If not you could test it by asking your friend to come along and see how she reacts.
Honestly, don't ask her out. Make sure you sit next to her during the next movie and try holding her hand. Worked for me.
Good luck! Even if she doesn't like you back try going out with her best friends. Also a great way to seek revenge.

Thanks! We actually held hands at Iron Man 2, but it started as high five and lasted for maybe 7 seconds. My best friend is also has girlfriends many times of the year so I usually try a make advances there... I wouldn't try the revenge thing though. We are all really tight, and I don't want to exclude all my friends over a girl who MIGHT like me.

Yeah revenge might not be the best answer. xD
I'm not sure but maybe the 7 second hand holding session might have been her signal.
Just try nudging your hand slowly toward hers and accidently bump it, see how she reacts.
If she doesn't get annoyed try stroking her hand (I just realised this is starting to sound like a porno, but this is how it worked for me!) and BOOM!!! I would put your arm around her since you are in a group and it might make things akward for everyone else. Wait till you're in privat and then talk to her about how she feels about you. If she only likes you as a friend, she happens. If she wants you to be more, great, but make sure you talk about telling the rest of the group! Or at least go on another 2 dates to see if this is really going somewhere.

 

[hyperhammy]

Don't lie to get somewhere with someone. It hardly ever works.

Also, rejection is better then wondering what could have been.

THIS ALL THE WAY!!! (CAPS LOCK BE AWEZOME RITE?!?!?!?!?!)
I always argue with my friends who are too afraid to ask someone out because they fear being rejected that the feeling of what could have been is by far worse.

 

[Matt Kloepfer]

Don't lie, be kind, be yourself, have confidence, and above all, just take your time.

 

[Talson]

Yeah... All of my girlfriend's always put the moves on me first. The only advice I can give is don't look, they'll find you. Not really helpful, sorry.

Only problem; society suggests that the guy makes the first move. So if the girl makes the first move, it's very rare. And with statistics, next to never happening.

See, I don't believe that. The odds of that happening multiple times to a single individual would be far too small. I really don't see anything special about me that would cause me to be exceptional.

 

[SUPA FRANKY]

I've never had a girlfriend, so I wouldn't know. But I have female friends. Let me give you an input.

If you want to go for at least a lasting relationship. Don't bullshit yourself. Don't go after girls based of looks 9 But that can be a major factor).

1.) Look for girls that share your interest. If you have nothing in common, then besides kissing and sex and whatever couples do, what else is there? Find a girl you have something in common with, and get to know her.

2.) Don't try any of those bullshit one liners. Don't try to impress them or make bad ass walks or spout lies about yourself. its really creepy and obvious what your going for. Be yourself.

3.) Don't make it obvious. Get in a situation that causes you to interact with them. Don't smile, just act how you would with your friends.

4.)I'm not going to sugarcoat this: Be presentable. The people who say that looks don't matter are usually the ones that don't have boyfriends/ girlfriends. If your obese, lose some weight. If you have odors, fix that. If she finds you disgusting, she won't really want to date you. But remember, looks ARE VERY important. But interest and personality are key.

5.)Don't date sexy girls/boys. They usually aren't good at anything besides looking pretty, are more likely to cheat, and usually if you can't do anything for them, leave you in the dust. Probably not all are like that, but most are. So don't go by looks.

6.) Read social cues. If she feels uncomfortable, back the fuck off. If she's crying or whatever, give her space, or if you managed to know her well enough, comfort her. People don'[t really like to be bothered when there feeling depressed.

7.) Know your league. Snag boys/ girls that are at or a little above your looks. The sexy people are off limits.

8.) Don't get a girl just because everyone else has one. Look for a girl you find...special ( I know that's corny.) You'll know when the time is right.

and finnaly...the finale

9.) DON'T RUSH IT! Start of as acquaintances. Then Friends! Don't follow her everywhere? Does she walk the way you go home, chat with her! Is she eating alone, join her! BUT DON'T GO OVERBOARD! DO NOT! I REPEAT, DO NOT MOVE FAST! If you do, ITS OVER.

I hoped that helped.

 

[FenrirsWilly]

1) Hyegene, noone wants to date someone who is always dirty and smells terrible

2) Self-confidence, this means not being a wussy, walk straight, make eye contact, etc

3) Cagones, you have to be willing to go for it, self-confidence you can fake to a degree, but having real cagones to just go for it with a girl you like will seal the deal

4) A Brain, by this I mean you need to be able to read some signs that the other person puts out, it can tell you whether they are or are not interested.

 

[Freshman]

enormous balls. take that anyway you like, but its definitely more attractive to women if you come straight out and be like, hey, go with me as opposed to dancing around it for a few years/months/weeks and then getting caught in "the friend zone" Also, be careful about your displays of manliness. lifting heavy things, good. being a total ass to any men you meet while out with your GF, bad

 

[SimuLord]

My two rules would seem self-contradictory, but they work:

Don't go looking but don't miss it when it comes to you.

You want to drive a girl wild, make her feel like you're something other than putty in her hands. Overeager is a pretty good antonym for sexy. If she's asking herself "why's this guy different? Is it me?" then you've done half your work already.

My best relationships were the ones where the girl approached me, I spent some time sizing her up and not overplaying my hand, then when I saw the opening, I seized the initiative.

 

[theironbat46]

Yeah revenge might not be the best answer. xD
I'm not sure but maybe the 7 second hand holding session might have been her signal.
Just try nudging your hand slowly toward hers and accidently bump it, see how she reacts.
If she doesn't get annoyed try stroking her hand (I just realised this is starting to sound like a porno, but this is how it worked for me!) and BOOM!!! I would put your arm around her since you are in a group and it might make things akward for everyone else. Wait till you're in privat and then talk to her about how she feels about you. If she only likes you as a friend, she happens. If she wants you to be more, great, but make sure you talk about telling the rest of the group! Or at least go on another 2 dates to see if this is really going somewhere.

Wow, thanks man. I really needed advice, I be sure to report on how that night went. Hopefully Scott Pilgrim might be a first date.. A nerd can dream..

 

[Plauged1]

Im quite a nervous guy, so I dont understand how I ever got a girl to like me, let alone date me. Here is how every encounter goes with a girl I like: She comes to my vicinity, and my shoulders are immediately up to my ears, everything I say is said weakly and I usually end up embarassing myself. But surprisingly some girls actually like that, which confuses me, which somehow charms them even more. I find it fucked up, but hey, I at least got a girl, and thats how I really am so at least Im not being a poser. Unfortunately, guys like me tend to attract psychopaths for some reason, as Im still trying to get my stalker to understand I want nothing to do with her anymore.=/

 

[Infinatex]

Just be fun and do fun things. If you both are having fun and a connection is there you are definitely going to know about it. From there just do what feel right.

 

[Freshman]

Be yourself.

Okay I need some tips. I really like this girl. We are really good friends. We have an entire group of friends around seven people. We go to the movies many times. Maybe even this Saturday.. We have a lot of stuff in common [Comic Books, Jokes, Television, etc.] We have shared lots of awesome moments. That time we all saw Iron Man 2. I sat next to her, we talked the whole time. It felt like a date. The last movie we saw [Eclipse, she liked it I heard The Last Airbender sucked ass.] So all our friends left and we just sat on the bike rack [My parents make me wait till everyone leaves so no one is abducted] and talked. It was great. But she never responds to my text, but she used to in the spring. Also she might have a crush on my best friend. So you have an idea of how much I like her, and my reasons for being so nervous. Should I ask her out at The Other Guys [this Saturday] or Scott Pilgrim [for a romantic tune] ? Or at all? Please advice.

You may be stuck in "the friend zone" in which case, she either likes you and is waiting for you to make a move, or she doesn't and You'll just have to settle for being friends. Even then, I've never had a good experience come from dating somebody who has all the same friends as you. usually drives people apart. its kinda like that addage, "don't stick your pen (is) in the company ink" Oh, and take her to see the expendables. I really want somebody to try that please.