I've let go of meeting someone at the moment, because I just don't think I'm designed for it. There are so many things about the gender wars that irk me.
1) "Guys make the first move" Honestly, I would never see someone that "waited" for me to make the first move. You're either interested or you're not and if you fall into line with that socially constructed "rule", you're not my type.
2) "I want someone who can protect me" (possibly not said quite like that, but essentially). How am I supposed to respect that? If I love someone, I'll go down fighting for them, but I don't want someone who looks to me at the first sign of trouble. I'm looking for a partner, you know? If I wanted to protect something, I'd visit a pet store. That's the first thing I liked about my last girlfriend, because if someone gave her grief she was more than capable of dishing it back.
3) "I like confidence" He's your partner, not your lawyer. I always go for bookish, insecure, neurotic, world-haters so we can read books, be insecure, share our neuroses and hate the world together, surely there is someone out there who seeks same.
Hmm, I should stop, I'm just venting now, haha. The people I have met that have filled my bizarro world criteria though, I've met completely randomly through friends of friends (I have muso friends so plenty of ballsy world-haters there!) I don't think you're likely to meet someone at a bar unless you honestly like going to bars, ditto clubs (unless you're dragged along, in which case there's a 5% chance you'll meet someone else who hates bars/clubs and was dragged along).
So yeah, do social things that you really like doing. Take a short course in something you like, it'll be filled with new people who share at least one interest. You're a reader? Join a book club! Like theatre? A touch harder, but it's surprising the conversations that get struck on during intermission. (PS, this is why gamers struggle I think. Female gamers are rare but they exist right? It's hard because there's no gamer outlet for mixing with new people, while gaming. Someone needs to open...er...a licensed bar/open LAN party?)
But seriously, if you're not confident, don't fake it. Looks lame if you fail, and if you succeed then you're just stuck faking it forever.