Have You Ever Heard Your Roomie(s)...

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revjor

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Sep 30, 2011
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All the time with 3 different roomates. I've even heard my old roomate sleeping with my new roomate. It's unescapeable
 

Bara_no_Hime

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Sep 15, 2010
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ReservoirAngel said:
Stop giving me ideas!
**looks innocent**

Why would I want to stop? Ideas are one of the best things you can give a person. It's how human society advances.

**walks away whistling**
 

ReservoirAngel

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Nov 6, 2010
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Bara_no_Hime said:
ReservoirAngel said:
Stop giving me ideas!
**looks innocent**

Why would I want to stop? Ideas are one of the best things you can give a person. It's how human society advances.

**walks away whistling**
Yeah but you're filling my head with lurid filth. Sure it's mostly filled with that anyway, but you're not helping matters by filling my mind with thoughts of naughty things that could never happen.
 

Yellowbeard

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Nov 2, 2010
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Sure. A couple different roommates. Only one case bothered me at all because I was infatuated with the girl in question.

I'm sure my roommates hear me doing it all the time. Keep it quiet as possible but not gonna be sorry for it. If I waited for the house to be empty I'd be lucky to get laid once a month
 

ramboondiea

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Oct 11, 2010
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yes..yes i have, its just not right. but basically i just choose to return the favour with the noisiest women i knew,was a fun morning when he my room-mate came down to find me and i was just there with my coffee and a smile ear to ear haha.

there was also the time i had to fix his bed because they broke it, he swears it just broke for nothing haha.
 

rosac

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Sep 13, 2008
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Yep, he plays music, but you can still hear his gf over it... not cool.

Possibly even worse was when I was chilling at a (Female) Friends room and her neighbour brought a guy back. She was loud. Very loud. And enthusiastic. And hit the wall a few times. Just what you need when your lying in bed watching a film with someone, ey?
 

game-lover

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Dec 1, 2010
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I just remembered this other time in my dorm. Not my roomie but someone in the same dorm.

The place was sectioned with girls and boys divided by halls. Same floor but different areas of it. Anyway, the boys' hall was in the front of our floor and I was leaving to get some foods. As I passed by, habitually reading whatever's on the doors, one in particular started making sounds. I froze for a moment. And then hurried off as fast as I could go.

Happened two more times at around the same time of night. Same week. The third I remember passing by and saw a line of people leaning against the wall. Laughing amongst themselves and whispering pervy things. I remember pausing as I went by, wondering what they were doing. Then my brain seemed to click and I simply whispered: "Again??"

After telling them about the first two times I overheard, I simply went on my way.
 

MetalDooley

Cwipes!!!
Feb 9, 2010
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Ireland
Yep when I lived in London the house we were in had fucking paper thin walls so I could hear everything that went on both in my housemates bedroom and in my next door neighbours bedroom which were on either side of my room.On more than one occasion I was treated to the sounds of both of them going for it at the same time.My solution - Headphones and music
 

albinoterrorist

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Jan 1, 2009
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Oh, yeah.
By the sounds of it, she thought it'd be quieter in her bathroom, against the walls, for some reason.
It really, really wasn't.
If anything, the plumbing amplified it.

Pretty hilarious the third time round, as I decided that if I was gonna have to sit it out, I might as well have some Tea (fuck off, i'm British, okay).
So, as the water's boiling, she walks into the kitchen, wearing only a dressing gown and looking very red in the face.
And that was before she noticed I was still awake.
Good times... For me, of course.
Wasn't as funny for her.
 

BehattedWanderer

Fell off the Alligator.
Jun 24, 2009
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Oh yeah. Been on both ends of that one. I'm not gonna apologize for it, really, I'll try to keep it down, but at least two of my four roommates have done it while I was in the next room. One would only do it when I wasn't around, though, for a deluded sense of courtesy. Depending how long it lasted, I might make muffins afterward, in either case. Burning that much energy, anyone would need a snack, and I'm a good roommate.
 

albinoterrorist

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Jan 1, 2009
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BehattedWanderer said:
Depending how long it lasted, I might make muffins afterward, in either case. Burning that much energy, anyone would need a snack, and I'm a good roommate.
Giving out post-sex muffins...?
Are... Are you Jesus?
 
Oct 11, 2011
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nope....none of my roommates had girlfriends...except for two of my roommates...and one of them was courteous enough to at least get a hotel room nearby but it was awkward to stumble into the hotel bill on the dinner table.

The other one: Well I opened door, heard him scream my name....realized he wasn't thinking of me (don't ask) when I heard a girl gasp in surprise. I walk outside...and my neighbor and his girlfriend are outside. They ask me why I'm downstairs...I said I walked into them...and they decided to go to my window (which was open btw) and scream "YEAH MAN! HIT THAT!", much to my enjoyment.

Two hours later, they were finally done...and I finally got some sleep.

Moral of the story: Sock on knob rule = mandatory rule.
 

Timberwolf0924

New member
Sep 16, 2009
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I live with my brother.. here's a story for ya

Came home one night, with my ex, we decided to have a little make up session and we came into the front door and there was my brother and his girl friend. On the living room floor going at it like animals.

I was like "Damn, hit it!" and they broke apart and hid behind the couch, of course a pillow was thrown, then me and my ex went to do our own.

A second one, my buddy and his girlfriend wanted to hit up a local bar that just opened in town so they called me at work and I told them to meet at my house.
Pulled up to my driveway and say their car sitting there. I pull up next to it and see his girlfriend just hopping on him like a rabbit. I'm thinking they're messing with me so I watch for like 30 seconds. then I honk my horn and she literally jumps into the back seat and covers up. (Their windows are blacked out so I couldn't see if she was naked or not) I go into the house and they come in beet red and embarassed.
 

userwhoquitthesite

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Jul 23, 2009
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JoesshittyOs said:
Hold on one sec...

So the girl was cheating on her boyfriend?
no, one roommate was fucking her boyfriend in another roommates bed.

The only time I've heard my roommate having sex, it was when he and his internet girlfriend were on cam together.

Needless to say, I started playing highly inappropriate music as close to his door as i could manage.

I am told it is very, very difficult to fap to War Pigs
 

Nanaki316

New member
Oct 23, 2009
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Not room mates, but friends. I've also heard my dad and step mother at it, and my brother with his fiancé. It's not the best.

However I've been caught doing it with my boyfriend on the dining room table by his brother. Cue shock and awe and uh oh there go the dining table legs. Smash.
 

BehattedWanderer

Fell off the Alligator.
Jun 24, 2009
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albinoterrorist said:
BehattedWanderer said:
Depending how long it lasted, I might make muffins afterward, in either case. Burning that much energy, anyone would need a snack, and I'm a good roommate.
Giving out post-sex muffins...?
Are... Are you Jesus?
Nope. Just a good guy.

And a ridiculous fan of muffins. I mean, really, Muffins are awesome, and anytime I get to make them is just a bonus. Because then I get to eat them.
 

soren7550

Overly Proud New Yorker
Dec 18, 2008
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Spot1990 said:
How thin are your walls? You heard the condom being put on and the sound of penetration? I don't even think I can hear those when I'm the one having sex. What the hell has your room mate got down there that squishes so loudly?

TBH honest I'd have started playing some Barry White really loudly or shout in an exhausted, out of breath voice asking if they had any tissues I could use.
Well, the rooms are mostly divided by glass doors (which are blocked on the roomie's end with his crappy Ikea bookcases), and I don't know. Maybe they lubed it up a lot or something?

And the Barry White sounds like an awesome idea. Me and the boyfriends heard the girl and another come in late (about the same time the girl entered when the nasty was done) last night, and as we hear them enter the roomie's room, we asked ourselves if they were going to do it. Admittedly, we got a little excited that they would, because we loaded up some Barry White and had the computer ready to blast it. But they didn't (started smoking instead), so we got all disappointed that nothing was going to happen. (also, I was pretty sure that made us a bit perverted)
 

JochemHippie

Trippin' balls man.
Jan 9, 2012
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Yeah... a lot. Though I don't think I should complain about that because I make a lot more noise...

Though a roommate once picked this girl up that literally did nothing then screech, scream and curse during the sex.
 

Mariakko

Senior Member
Nov 21, 2011
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I can hear all 4 of my flatmates doing it whenever I'm home. And that one girl, She brings home about 2 different guys a week. It's so damn loud.