How do we kill superman?

[Cosplay Horatio]

Gentlemen. It has come to our attention that we have no idea how to kill Superman.

That's obvious, we hit him with the US Army! Or the US Army armed with Kryptonite bullets. Or something else involving really expensive US Army stuff.

No, it is too dangerous. We should remain silent and allow the poster to be buried under the weight of his own foolish discussions.

Epic Answer!

We give up on him. We shout, yell, and channel so much hate to him that he dies from anguish at the people who rejects him.

Doomsday didn't kill him because his body went into a protective hyper coma. Kryptonite wont work because the people that love him will save him. So the people have to some how all together just hate him and he'll die.

It's kinda like a reversal in that episode of Dr. Who where the world who simply spoke his name and remembered his stories brought back his life. This too in reverse can kill Superman.

 

[BehattedWanderer]

Kryptonite-frosted cupcakes. And then sprinkle some on Wonder Woman, watch him writhe in pain while his lover inadvertently kills him.

 

[Rhade]

I'm betting this has been said by now but if you mean kill him, as in destroy his image, make him mostly unlikable unless awesomely revived or some such, one simple way:

Do to him what Twilight did to vampires and werewolves. Surefire way to make something less palatable (unless rather well done) to most of us, water it down, destroy its mythos, make it emo and market to little girls, teenage girls, soccer moms and the like.

 

[Sir Kemper]

*Places Breifecase*

Gentlemen? I have waited this moment for my enitre life, here's how were going to do it...


1. Custome build a .50 Sniper rifle, with a kryptonite tip.

2. Take a vantage point.

3. Fire at will.

4. Use the body to make merchandise.

5.Profit.

Adjusts tie, don't worry, Gentlemen, the Grityy Super-Man movie...shall never be!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!

 

[Rhade]

I'm betting this has been said by now but if you mean kill him, as in destroy his image, make him mostly unlikable unless awesomely revived or some such, one simple way:

Do to him what Twilight did to vampires and werewolves. Surefire way to make something less palatable (unless rather well done) to most of us, water it down, destroy its mythos, make it emo and market to little girls, teenage girls, soccer moms and the like.

*sigh* thanks for reminding me that vampires use to be badass predators of the night and not goth girl masturbatory aides.

Go watch Daybreakers and other such dark-violence-gore-etc vampire films to take your mind off it.

 

[almostgold]

In Dark Knight Returns:

Spoiler

Superman doesn't die, but comes damn close. First he's hit with a mega-nuclear weapon designed by the Soviet's to simulate a mass nuclear strike, gets cut off from the yellow sun, then Batman tosses him around with a few cruise missiles, then deploys a sonic weapon to hurt superman, then uses a power suit to fight it out fist to fist. Then Green Arrow shoots a synthetic kryptonite arrow at Superman. He doesn't die, but he comes damn close.

 

[Umberphoenix]

You kill him with fire.

 

[Somthing]

I just want to say thank you. Clicking this thread was a lot of fun xD Just entering and imagining sitting in like a circle of evil mastermind type people going. How should we kill superman!??

Thank you!!!!

 

[-BloodRush-]

magic also hurts him. and its cheaper than kryptonite. *browses spellbook*

 

[tiredinnuendo]

I don't really follow Superman, but didn't he come back from death already with an explanation about how he'd "died" because he expended all his energy and he just needed to restore it for awhile to come back? Or something? Doesn't that make him effectively immortal?

Also, Kryptonite never, ever works. It just makes him appear weak for awhile before he wills his way through it. Frankly, if Kryptonite was actually deadly to him, he'd have been dead long ago.

How to kill Superman.... hrm....

I guess you could flood an area with red sunlight, thus weakening him to the point that he can be injured, but then you'd have to completely destroy the body so that nothing remained to be reanimated.

And even then they'd probably restore him some other way. Superman is basically Freddy Krueger. As long as they believe in him, he exists.

- J