How would you run hell?
- Thread starter AzrealMaximillion
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The way I would run hell is allow people/ damned souls to partake in pure indulgence of the 7 deadly sins. At first, this seems like an ideal life. No morals, no rules, just the embodiment of every carnal act. But, you cannot die in the afterlife. If you are injured, you will not heal. No matter what you consume, you will not be full. As you decay throughout eternity you will become sentient dust, every particle of your being will know it exists, and you will ache with a thousand desires with no means to quell them.
Hell is eternal emptiness.
-note, I've had this "image of hell" saved in a notepad for about 6 years... I knew it would come in handy one day ^_^
Hell is eternal emptiness.
-note, I've had this "image of hell" saved in a notepad for about 6 years... I knew it would come in handy one day ^_^
I'd have a cool title, like the Educator or the Vindicator. Before you come in, you get a glimpse of Paradise, then get shot down at breakneck speed through the floor through the flaming section only there to scare the piss out of you. You'd reach the ground, be evaluated by the Judgmental, and sent on your way.
First of all, I'd keep the damned place nice. Have a few artsy dead guys do interior decorating. The main facility wouldn't be flaming; I'd run it like Paradise's reform school. Behave, and I'll let you out. Any minor offense that isn't considered a deadly sin will get a lecture, the Wrath cell cuffs you for a bit, and you get stamped letter of recommendation to the escalator. Maybe a few odd jobs if I just don't like you.
Lusty folks are put in a pocket dimension as a child to live through their formative years and regain their innocence. If that doesn't work they get dropped into Slender for a few rounds, being chased by Gary Busey with a stiffy.
Gluttonous folks are put in a dimension where they are an athlete, prime of their life and physical condition, feel the joy of winning the Olympics, stuff like that. If that doesn't break 'em, put them as a child on a UNICEF commercial.
Greedy people get the typical garbage; Wall Street executive, master of money, yet still not happy, bla bla bla. Run through joylessness enough, and if that doesn't work, put them in Accounting for an eternity and a half.
Sloth gets a guy a position as Hell's gofer, back-and-forth, back-and-forth, up the stairs, down the stairs(NOT the escalator), get stuck with a cattle prod if you stop sprinting. If that doesn't work, you're put in a dimension as a speed addict eternally on speed. You WISH you could sleep.
Wrath get to let it out for a while on the blasphemers as mentioned about, or maybe provide entertainment for the rest of us in cage fights. If they don't respond, repeat for eternity.
Envy: see Greed.
For the prideful, keep a group of insult comics on call to study and put them down until content or depressed like the rest of us.
After that, you get a stamped letter and you're the property of the poor bastard who has to care how you feel.
First of all, I'd keep the damned place nice. Have a few artsy dead guys do interior decorating. The main facility wouldn't be flaming; I'd run it like Paradise's reform school. Behave, and I'll let you out. Any minor offense that isn't considered a deadly sin will get a lecture, the Wrath cell cuffs you for a bit, and you get stamped letter of recommendation to the escalator. Maybe a few odd jobs if I just don't like you.
Lusty folks are put in a pocket dimension as a child to live through their formative years and regain their innocence. If that doesn't work they get dropped into Slender for a few rounds, being chased by Gary Busey with a stiffy.
Gluttonous folks are put in a dimension where they are an athlete, prime of their life and physical condition, feel the joy of winning the Olympics, stuff like that. If that doesn't break 'em, put them as a child on a UNICEF commercial.
Greedy people get the typical garbage; Wall Street executive, master of money, yet still not happy, bla bla bla. Run through joylessness enough, and if that doesn't work, put them in Accounting for an eternity and a half.
Sloth gets a guy a position as Hell's gofer, back-and-forth, back-and-forth, up the stairs, down the stairs(NOT the escalator), get stuck with a cattle prod if you stop sprinting. If that doesn't work, you're put in a dimension as a speed addict eternally on speed. You WISH you could sleep.
Wrath get to let it out for a while on the blasphemers as mentioned about, or maybe provide entertainment for the rest of us in cage fights. If they don't respond, repeat for eternity.
Envy: see Greed.
For the prideful, keep a group of insult comics on call to study and put them down until content or depressed like the rest of us.
After that, you get a stamped letter and you're the property of the poor bastard who has to care how you feel.
I'd create a "Special" hell for Child Molesters and people who talk at the theater. And in it, all would be forced to play Dead Rising... forever...
Since I'm not an unforgivably-immoral asshole like the Christian god, there would be no such thing as eternal punishment.
No human that has lived a finite amount of time could ever deserve an infinite amount of pain.
Stick the worst of the worst in boiling lava for a few days max and you'll no longer have evil people, is what I'd do.
No human that has lived a finite amount of time could ever deserve an infinite amount of pain.
Stick the worst of the worst in boiling lava for a few days max and you'll no longer have evil people, is what I'd do.
Like this
Ironic punishments. In my Hell you'll suffer 'till the end of time, enduring tortures, most of which rhyme.
Ironic punishments. In my Hell you'll suffer 'till the end of time, enduring tortures, most of which rhyme.
Yeah, but OP said "You're Lucifer." You are no longer human, mortal, or bound by morals.In Search of Username said:
And if the Catholic church is right and homosexuals go to Hell, then gay people will be forced to be with gay people, and adulterers with adulterers. I'm not sure you've thought this through...Arakasi said:
I'd be the BEST prinny instructor.
Seriously though, if humans really did somehow retain their conscious selves after death, then "hell" would be trisected into three separate areas. The rehabilitation area for the people with potential to be reintegrated into society, the reparation area, where people who have something mentally wrong with them are repaired, and the seclusion area. People who have something mentally wrong with them have the option to immediately go to the reparation area, and are sometimes forced to go if their mind is too far gone to make conscious or rational decisions. Once the reparation process is complete, and the individual shows the potential for rehabilitation, then they'll be given the option to be transferred to that area. Otherwise they'll have to go to the seclusion area, where they are put with people who have chosen to deny rehabilitation. Those who chose to deny reparation also go here, but in a separate area, and sometimes are totally secluded. It's a comfortable enough place, and any spiritual entity can choose to go here if they are deemed eligible for rehabilitation but deny it.
The rehabilitation area would be a sort of cleansing place. Like one giant spiritual detox/therapy clinic. At the same time they would be made to understand the pain that they intentionally caused others in an emotionally burdensome (but not brutal or vicious) way. With their heightened sense of empathy and such, they'll inevitably find it painful, which will be punishment in and of itself. If a human is deemed "rehabilitated" then they will be allowed to enter heaven (which would also be revamped) after they serve as a "guardian angel" for x amount of years. Sort of like community service. At any point, a spiritual entity will be allowed to terminate their own existence.
Seriously though, if humans really did somehow retain their conscious selves after death, then "hell" would be trisected into three separate areas. The rehabilitation area for the people with potential to be reintegrated into society, the reparation area, where people who have something mentally wrong with them are repaired, and the seclusion area. People who have something mentally wrong with them have the option to immediately go to the reparation area, and are sometimes forced to go if their mind is too far gone to make conscious or rational decisions. Once the reparation process is complete, and the individual shows the potential for rehabilitation, then they'll be given the option to be transferred to that area. Otherwise they'll have to go to the seclusion area, where they are put with people who have chosen to deny rehabilitation. Those who chose to deny reparation also go here, but in a separate area, and sometimes are totally secluded. It's a comfortable enough place, and any spiritual entity can choose to go here if they are deemed eligible for rehabilitation but deny it.
The rehabilitation area would be a sort of cleansing place. Like one giant spiritual detox/therapy clinic. At the same time they would be made to understand the pain that they intentionally caused others in an emotionally burdensome (but not brutal or vicious) way. With their heightened sense of empathy and such, they'll inevitably find it painful, which will be punishment in and of itself. If a human is deemed "rehabilitated" then they will be allowed to enter heaven (which would also be revamped) after they serve as a "guardian angel" for x amount of years. Sort of like community service. At any point, a spiritual entity will be allowed to terminate their own existence.
It would be straight out of disgaea with them paying off there sins as prinnys
Of course work would be even harder on them
Of course work would be even harder on them
Every single person would get one solitary room. What would be in this room?
A television, a Nintendo 64, a Playstation, a PS3, and a PC circa 2000. Accompanying them would be copies of Superman 64, Daikatana, E.T., Bubsy 3D, Big Rigs: Over The Road Racing, and Sonic '06.
The television would come complete with 300 channels of nothing but weather and news.
And the wallpaper would be whatever each person's specific least favorite color combination is.
A television, a Nintendo 64, a Playstation, a PS3, and a PC circa 2000. Accompanying them would be copies of Superman 64, Daikatana, E.T., Bubsy 3D, Big Rigs: Over The Road Racing, and Sonic '06.
The television would come complete with 300 channels of nothing but weather and news.
And the wallpaper would be whatever each person's specific least favorite color combination is.
individualized ironic punishment for a finite amount of time.
then give them a twisted world to live in that only has one law; survival of the fittest. if they die in that world the become reincarnated in to a savage and aggressive demon with no memory of who they once were. once in while a large number of souls will be released back to said creator when hell is two over populated with savage demons.
did i mention there would be a 5 year waiting line to enter that world.
i have more ideas for this world but this more then enough typed
then give them a twisted world to live in that only has one law; survival of the fittest. if they die in that world the become reincarnated in to a savage and aggressive demon with no memory of who they once were. once in while a large number of souls will be released back to said creator when hell is two over populated with savage demons.
did i mention there would be a 5 year waiting line to enter that world.
i have more ideas for this world but this more then enough typed
Toughen all my demons and cursed souls up and then go gatecrash one of Heaven's parties. Those harp-playing, dress-wearing bastards don't deserve to have a monopoly on the good times!
In the meantime Hell could be an epic metal festival. Perfect setting!
In the meantime Hell could be an epic metal festival. Perfect setting!