Humour needed

[Simriel]

you know wut i hate. im 13, so a bunch of kids in my class are 12 year old twats who think just saying "youre gay" and "stop raping people, gay." are insulting. but when you say an intelligent insult, the idiots don't understand wut you just said and think you are an idiot.

We have all been there. Right up till i left high school, i would come out with witty, soul destroying put downs. and the idiots would be like... wut? Yer gay. *sighs* epic facepalm

 

[J-Man]

If they insult you and then leave or turn around, I usually say
"And that's why generations of in-breeding should be avoided."

 

[nolongerhere]

I'LL EAT YOU'RE CHILDREN WITH CHIPS AND MUSHY PEAS!!!
Alaways unexpected.

 

[Simriel]

you know wut i hate. im 13, so a bunch of kids in my class are 12 year old twats who think just saying "youre gay" and "stop raping people, gay." are insulting. but when you say an intelligent insult, the idiots don't understand wut you just said and think you are an idiot.

We have all been there. Right up till i left high school, i would come out with witty, soul destroying put downs. and the idiots would be like... wut? Yer gay. *sighs* epic facepalm

I know. middle school sucks. its full of fags, bitchy girls, and annoying "gangstas".

Scottish schools are worse. You don't have 'neds'

 

[nolongerhere]

I'LL EAT YOU'RE CHILDREN WITH CHIPS AND MUSHY PEAS!!!
Alaways unexpected.

It be.

(shweet! pulp fiction avatar ftw!)

I'm impressed, in my school most of the 17 and 18 year olds haven't even heard of pulp fiction, let alone the 13 year olds. You have my respect.

 

[samsprinkle]

NOTE: we are not REALLY gay...That being said we always put people down about being straight and I made up the term "socket" to refer to a straight person. It's fun to make fun of people. Except one chick ACTUALLY thought I was gay one time. *shudders*

 

[Lucia di Lammermore]

Shakespere insults FTW

You speak an infinite deal of nothing

Totally better than "ur dumb"

 

[KittywifaMohawk]

"We could have a battle of wits, but you're unarmed."

I think I'm going to be stealing this one. I really like that one.

And for me? I usually don't say comebacks. I usually just tell them to shut the fuck up(original isn't it?). Or I just call them a whore.(jokingly, most of the time)

 

[Ranooth]

In the immortal words of some random noob on Gmod: "Go cock yourself"

 

[Double-O]

I just say stuff like "oh yea? ... well, your queen", which is a variation on the 'your mum' retort. Mind you, I've never used this retort in a country where there is an actual monarchy in power, so yea. There's also the "fuck your couch" attack.

 

[Avatar Roku]

you know wut i hate. im 13, so a bunch of kids in my class are 12 year old twats who think just saying "youre gay" and "stop raping people, gay." are insulting. but when you say an intelligent insult, the idiots don't understand wut you just said and think you are an idiot.

I'm 16 and I have the same problem.

I do like some Shakespearean insults. "You Canker blossom!" "I do desire that we may be better strangers"

 

[Chaz D]

"Yeah, well at least my dad's not dead."

Best used on somebody whose dad is dead. And yes, I have used this one.

A tad harsh?

Not really. He stole my muffin.

 

[RAWKSTAR]

"Yeah, well at least my dad's not dead."

Best used on somebody whose dad is dead. And yes, I have used this one.

A tad harsh?

Not really. He stole my muffin.

Fair enough, no man touches someone elses muffin thats for sure!

 

[Lord_Ascendant]

I just insert the phrase "thats what she said " into day-to-day conversation.

 

[DeathsAmbassador]

I'm not very good at insults but I have a few comebacks.

When someone calls me gay I always say either "you wish" or "your mom would disagree".

Not great but I think they're kinda funny.

 

[barryween]

When someone says a lame yo mama joke I say "Yo mama so stupid, she thought that joke was funny." I also say "yep I totally am [What ever the person called me.]
If you cant think of anything, be nice to them "GREAT insult dude." or "Wow. That was superb! High five!" That screws with them every time.