I can't do this anymore

[Biosophilogical]

Ok, I'll start at the beginning.

Problem number one: You are far too open with this girl, and she is abusing it. Now you have a couple options, you can either a) Take some time to yourself, accept what has happened, *insert inner peace stuff here*; b)get petty revenge by attacking her verbally and emotionally (but do it in a cold and brutal fashion, don't get teary-eyed or anything otherwise it will not work) NOTE: only do this if it makes you feel better, because getting you back on your feet is the biggest thing right now; c) Create an emotional block to stop yourself being overwhelmed and deal with it a little at a time until it doesn't hurt so much.

Problem number two: She knows how to get inside your head. Now, your best option here is to focus yourself on your goal (the topic of your conversation/to answer a maths question/etc) so that she can no longer make you feel bad about yourself when she is in the wrong. So what you need to do is ignore pretty much every attempt she makes at controlling a conversation and be persistent about what you want to say, and when you are done, just tell her to 'shut up because the conversation is finished' and walk away, head held high.

Problem number 3: You are still emotionally attached to this girl. My advice, throw yourself into anything and everything which makes you happy, as her seeing you happy without her will throw her off her game and she won't be able to pull the same old tricks on you again. Another thing you should do is to always be around one or more of your friends, so when you see her, you can look to your friend and start a conversation, which will make her feel as though you are over her which will do exactly the same thing as being happy will.

NOTE: I truly think that making her feel bad will not help, BUT if you can honestly say to yourself that it will, and you know her well enough to pull it off, then that is your decision and I hope it makes you feel better.

 

[Nerdfury]

Ahh, teenage bullshit. Takes me back to when I was a teenager and.. well.. I was never that whipped by girls. It's kinda like cigarettes - you see a bunch of your friends vomit profusely after the first few and you realise it's really not worth it. After seeing your friend crawl around for some tart that keeps leading him around by the balls, you realise it's not worth investing in.

Take from that what you will.

 

[Nyan Cat]

Seems like the only way to fix this is by a good ol' backhand.

On a more serious note, just stay away from her. Do what everyone else is saying and just block her out.

 

[Bobkat1252]

As a person who's been there and back, the best advice I can give you is to move on. Whenever I though of how much we had cared about each other and the good times we had, I forced myself to then think of the terrble things she did to me. This eventually helped me to get completely over her. If she tries to get back into your life like my ex did with me, be wary and don't let down your guard too easily.

I don't see myself being anymore than friends on the most basic level with my ex for the future, but I don't know about the exact details of your life so I can't judge. Maybe things will get better and you can go back to the way things were, but whatever the case, there needs to be space between you two in order for healing to begin.

 

[Arcadia2000]

Man, I remember all that painful teenage stuff. I got broken up with the day before my sixteenth birthday. He was my very first boyfriend. I was sad, and I cried. It hurts and you see each other in the halls or at the games, or worse when you're out at the store. And you're angry and hurt and you think your life is over, that you could never hurt any more than you do right then. But, you're no different than millions of teenagers all over the world. Start by not being sad, and get mad. She was shitty. You deserve better than that. It feels better than sad. Soon, you can let go of the anger and move to indifference. Lots of people have shitty teenage relationships. (It doesn't make her the scum of the universe, just another stupid teenager. Stupid teenagers can and do grow up into decent people.) As you move into that indifference phase, you'll see other girls just as nice or even nicer. It works. Get together with some guys, go play some games, and even though it's going to be tough to forget and it's going to hurt for awhile, it gets better.

Now: IF you really, truly find yourself thinking about not wanting to live, or that the world would be better off without you, or different ways to end your pain permanently, or getting back at her by showing her how much she meant to by killing yourself, then you are hereby ordered to speak to your school counselor immediately. Go during study hall, or lunch, or get a pass at homeroom. Class can wait if it has to; your health is more important. I can understand not wanting to talk to your parents, but if they don't have a history of coming home drunk and beating you, then odds are they probably do give a shit how you're doing. Tell then it's tough right now, and would they mind going to a movie with you, or playing some cards, or grabbing an ice cream.

What you seem to be asking is what the hell do I do with myself now? The answer is, we don't realy know. We can give you advice, most of which has been stay away from that crazy (most high school girls are, unfortunately, but we thought the same thing about the guys, so...) and concentrate on the good stuff. Midterms are coming up - study hard. Christmas is on the way - listen to some tunes, go see lights, buy a toy for "Toys for Tots" and talk to a Marine (they're nice people - I married one). Make hot chocolate and watch TV (after homework). Life is still awesome if you want it to be. I mean, geez, you have indoor plumbing and microwaves and video games - life IS awesome. Get a 10-day free WOW card (and make sure you play Horde! ). Go for a walk. Got siblings? Bug them, but then give them a cookie. Just keep going.

 

[Brad Shepard]

Ok, I'll start at the beginning.

Problem number one: You are far too open with this girl, and she is abusing it. Now you have a couple options, you can either a) Take some time to yourself, accept what has happened, *insert inner peace stuff here*; b)get petty revenge by attacking her verbally and emotionally (but do it in a cold and brutal fashion, don't get teary-eyed or anything otherwise it will not work) NOTE: only do this if it makes you feel better, because getting you back on your feet is the biggest thing right now; c) Create an emotional block to stop yourself being overwhelmed and deal with it a little at a time until it doesn't hurt so much.

Problem number two: She knows how to get inside your head. Now, your best option here is to focus yourself on your goal (the topic of your conversation/to answer a maths question/etc) so that she can no longer make you feel bad about yourself when she is in the wrong. So what you need to do is ignore pretty much every attempt she makes at controlling a conversation and be persistent about what you want to say, and when you are done, just tell her to 'shut up because the conversation is finished' and walk away, head held high.

Problem number 3: You are still emotionally attached to this girl. My advice, throw yourself into anything and everything which makes you happy, as her seeing you happy without her will throw her off her game and she won't be able to pull the same old tricks on you again. Another thing you should do is to always be around one or more of your friends, so when you see her, you can look to your friend and start a conversation, which will make her feel as though you are over her which will do exactly the same thing as being happy will.

NOTE: I truly think that making her feel bad will not help, BUT if you can honestly say to yourself that it will, and you know her well enough to pull it off, then that is your decision and I hope it makes you feel better.

If i may add somthing, from what ive gathered from his post the op seems way to nice, he cant worry how she feels about all this

 

[Mekado]

First of all. Tee hee. I did laugh a little at parts since i have seen this 1000 times.
Second of all

Spoiler: ???

Stop caring. Thats what i did. only girl i have felt emotion for still exists but she has a D-Bag boyfriend so we haven't talked. Drugs are a crutch for people who can't deal with life. Your young you'll get over it and you probably still don't know what true love feels like. Good luck.

Also the part that made me laugh was when you said the happiest moment in your life was when she said i love you....Mine was when i bought my Guitar.

That demotivator is awesomely funny ^^

 

[Aedes]

Well, everyone already said what I had to say.
There's still one thing that's bugging me though, where are your friends?

You desperatly need someone to hold you up right now and friends are the best for this.
Unless you have none due to whatever reason you have. It doesn't concern me.

I stick with most of the posts above me. Cut all relationship ties you have with her, focus on your studies and such, dig down on whatever makes you happy and in a couple years, we all will be laughing at this moment.
Cheer up dude. Life is long. Don't destroy it becouse of one person.

 

[Mekado]

i suggest changing your tampon. all that crybaby bitching was unnecessary. there over THREE BILLION vagina's in the world. find another one.

Way to kick a man when he's already down.You've never been sad even though you (logically) knew you were going the wrong way ?

 

[ibatterbadgers]

It sounds like you've made more than a fair effort to maintain a good friendship with this girl and all she has done is to take advantage of you yet again. My advice would be to distance yourself from her as much as possible and try to move on. If you see each other a lot in unavoidable situations, such as at school, try explaining to her that you do want to be friends but you need some time and space to get over her. If she is serious about being friends with you she will understand and give you the space you need, and who knows one day it may stop hurting enough that you can actually be friends with her. If she reacts badly when you say this, however, and tries to start another argument, just be the bigger man. Walk away rather than giving in and fighting, and cut her out of your life for good. Either way you will move on, and it will be her loss.

 

[LiteraryLitany]

Yeah, there are a LOT of girls out there looking for a guy to being their emotional crutch rather than any kind of actual human being or, I don't know, PARTNER(I get to hear the girl's side of this situation a lot because I'm Ms Good for Advice I'll Promptly Ignore Then Realize She's Right Months Later) and let me tell you, the best thing you can do is tell her you're not going to be her crutch or your punching bag anymore and have nothing to do with her until she gets her shit together. And may I say, for the most part, girls who need male emotional support in a non-romantic way can't keep up female relationships and that is a BIG FLASHING WARNING SIGN. Nice female friends are easy to find if you're not judgmental yourself.

 

[Firia]

I feel your plight. I'm almost 30, and when by some turn of events you lose someone you really connect with- by either them dumping you, or whatever, it's always hard. A few years ago, I met a woman I could easily have spent the rest of my life with, quite happily. In the end, something happened, and we had to split ways. Us splitting up was the most painful experience of my life. I spent two weeks easily in a state of bottom-level depression. I did turn to drugs and alcohol, and it did not help. If anything, it made me prone to bad ideas that I wouldn't have considered otherwise.

I still talk to her, periodicly, and we're still friends. With time, the pain faded. It took me two years to get back onto the dating game; not because the pain lingered that long. No, the pain dulled off after about a month. I just didn't have the energy or will to put my heart on the line like that again. Meanwhile, I focused on work, my art hobbies, school, etc etc. Even though there are times where you feel like you can't focus, but only think about her, you slog through it.

Time is the only remedy for this. Talking to friends, and having support will help (and if you can get these things from in-person friends-not internet friends), it will help speed the healing. But time is the only real solution.

I know these words won't help. But I hope you take my advice anyway. In time, it may help more than you know.

 

[Firia]

i suggest changing your tampon. all that crybaby bitching was unnecessary. there over THREE BILLION vagina's in the world. find another one.

You have been reported for unnecessary douchbaggery.

 

[Robby Foxfur]

A life lesson you have learned I'm sorry it had to be so hard but yes, it is time to move on. If she is on your mind a lot tell yourself that your only going to think about her for 5 minuets and then when 5 minutes is up don't think about it. Yeah its hard at first but then you master it and start to feel better.

And for future reference, in a relationship with a girl you can be 2 things, you can be right or you can be happy. (Ralfy May) (if you find someone that allows you to be both Marry them)

 

[Space Cowgirl]

Sorry to hear 'bout all that but I suppose that this'll be a life lesson for you. Trust me, I remember all that dating drama growing up, though I didn't get into the dating scene much, but I'll try and throw my two cents at ya. To be perfetly honest, I think you need to sever ties with her and stop being her emotional yo-yo. I know it's gonna be hard to get her outta your mind, but if you just concentrate on more important things and spend time hanging out with other girls and with your in-person friends, things will get better.

 

[fgdfgdgd]

i've been there, getting used and abused doesn't help you feel great about yourself when you walked into it, my own way of dealing with it was writing, i write poetry and sometimes the odd dark story to just let out all my emotions, you should try it.

 

[mechanixis]

You are being made into a better person. And yes, the process is agonizing. "Suffering builds character."

I know that won't provide you with much solace - I know exactly how you feel. Your experience sounds a LOT like my first relationship. It's easy to say "life's not fair," but it's situations like this that really drive home to you exactly how truly horrible it is for that to be the reality.

Fittingly enough, my ex from that first ugly relationship - now several years separated - apologized to me today for the damage she did to me. I still don't think we fully understand what we did to one another, but it was a nice gesture.