I want to date my best friend

[Stalk3rchief]

There is an amazing girl who I've befriended and we seem to be hitting it off pretty well.
The problem is, I'm crazy about her and she's hard to read, so I'm just going to risk it all and tell her how I feel.
But, my escapist friends, I need your help. I am not a confident person, and I need some courage and advice. What do I say to this girl, what's a good way to tell her that I may very well have fallen in love with her without scaring her off or ruining our friendship if she doesn't feel the same way?

 

[MrGameluvr92]

When you're going to confess, don't blurt it out. Second, relax or else if you come up to her all jittery she may become nervous and fearful. Other than that I can only say that you should slowly build your way towards your confession. I wish you luck.

Also, what exactly is you avatar? I swear I've seen it but I can't place it....

 

[Dnangel]

In my opinion, this is something you shouldn't worry too much about. If you guys have a friendly relationship that has any chance of becoming a lasting romantic one, she won't condemn you if she doesn't feel the same way. If she does, then I don't know how much I would want to be in a relationship with her anyways. It may get a bit awkward if she doesn't feel the same, but it won't last. The most important part is timing it well. Make sure you guys have been together long enough and are close enough for her to really get to know you and consider it (because she will have considered it too, trust me) but not so long that your opportunity is gone or she ends up with someone else.

Good luck man.

 

[DasDestroyer]

The simplest way would be to ask her how she feels about you. If she feels the same way, go in for the kill kiss, if not, then there isn't much you can do. Hope this helps

 

[Stalk3rchief]

When you're going to confess, don't blurt it out. Second, relax or else if you come up to her all jittery she may become nervous and fearful. Other than that I can only say that you should slowly build your way towards your confession. I wish you luck.

Also, what exactly is you avatar? I swear I've seen it but I can't place it....

T'is Zearth, from Bokurano.

 

[Booze Zombie]

Well, firstly, don't take advice off of the internet and secondly, ignore that rule for a second and just don't "try" anything. Don't think about it, don't plan it, just be you and if she likes you, it'll work.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Before you act, remember this...

Familiarity can breed attraction.

Intimacy can breed contempt.

Weigh your options and choose.

As for actually asking her out... it's the same as everything else in life: Simple is the best.

Just tell her, in plan, simple terms, that you are attracted to her in a more intimate way then friendship, and ask her out on a date.

Keep it simple, stupid (A phrase, not an insult).

 

[David Bray]

Date em.

I've only ever dated friends. Means you know them.

 

[Johnnyallstar]

Plant the flag pole and claim it as yours

That's a difficult subject to breach, but I suggest that you don't do it in a "OMG I LUVVRZ J00!" but wait until you've done something together, and just say something along the lines of "You know, I think I may be falling in love." Leave it indecisive. Ladies hate that, and they always have to fix it. The way she fixes it will determine what she thinks.

 

[BlueberryMUNCH]

Lad, this should be in the advise forum.

And don't get with her if she is your bestmate; it'll inevitably ruin your friendship.
So mmh. Though, you're old (;D) ish, so maybe it's not that big a deal.

I dunno mate, it's a huge risk, but if you're willing to take the risk, go for it lad. What do you have to lose?

Besides, if you really are good mates, she'll be able to put it behind her, right? :].

Just think...will it make you happier?
And is a relationship what you really want?

 

[Ham_authority95]

There is an amazing girl who I've befriended and we seem to be hitting it off pretty well.
The problem is, I'm crazy about her and she's hard to read, so I'm just going to risk it all and tell her how I feel.
But, my escapist friends, I need your help. I am not a confident person, and I need some courage and advice. What do I say to this girl, what's a good way to tell her that I may very well have fallen in love with her without scaring her off or ruining our friendship if she doesn't feel the same way?

When you're somewhere with just the two of you, just say "Hey, I've been wanting to tell you for a while that I like you more than a friend."

If her response is positive and she has the same feelings, ask her to do something together at a later date.

If her response is that she doesn't share your feelings, just say "Hey, cool. Just wanted to get that off my chest." and another girl will come along.

Hope that helps. If she rejects you, I would advice getting to know her female friends. You never know when one of them has the hots for you...

 

[Mittens The Kitten]

As admiral Akbar puts it...
ITS A TRAP!

 

[Bailoroc]

Can't say I have much experience in this department but I would suggest just asking her out first. If she says yes and you two hit it off, then having a few good dates would make telling her how you feel a little less awkward.

Incidentally, my parents consider themselves to still be "best friends"; they tend to have sucessful relationships.

 

[Stalk3rchief]

There is an amazing girl who I've befriended and we seem to be hitting it off pretty well.
The problem is, I'm crazy about her and she's hard to read, so I'm just going to risk it all and tell her how I feel.
But, my escapist friends, I need your help. I am not a confident person, and I need some courage and advice. What do I say to this girl, what's a good way to tell her that I may very well have fallen in love with her without scaring her off or ruining our friendship if she doesn't feel the same way?

When you're somewhere with just the two of you, just say "Hey, I've been wanting to tell you for a while that I like you more than a friend."

If her response is positive and she has the same feelings, ask her to do something together at a later date.

If her response is that she doesn't share your feelings, just say "Hey, cool. Just wanted to get that off my chest." and another girl will come along.

Hope that helps. If she rejects you, I would advice getting to know her female friends. You never know when one of them has the hots for you...

This is actually great advice. o.o

 

[Ham_authority95]

There is an amazing girl who I've befriended and we seem to be hitting it off pretty well.
The problem is, I'm crazy about her and she's hard to read, so I'm just going to risk it all and tell her how I feel.
But, my escapist friends, I need your help. I am not a confident person, and I need some courage and advice. What do I say to this girl, what's a good way to tell her that I may very well have fallen in love with her without scaring her off or ruining our friendship if she doesn't feel the same way?

When you're somewhere with just the two of you, just say "Hey, I've been wanting to tell you for a while that I like you more than a friend."

If her response is positive and she has the same feelings, ask her to do something together at a later date.

If her response is that she doesn't share your feelings, just say "Hey, cool. Just wanted to get that off my chest." and another girl will come along.

Hope that helps. If she rejects you, I would advice getting to know her female friends. You never know when one of them has the hots for you...

This is actually great advice. o.o

Just don't sweat it. If she says yes, you already know her as a friend, so you have that awkward "will we hit it off?" question out of the way.

If she says no, you wouldn't have come off too strong and you'll still be friends(if you follow my advice, anyway), plus you still have her (probably) large group of female friends to have romantic interests in.

 

[TheEdgeofDespair]

*snip*

Speaking as someone who was in a virtually identical situation not but a year ago, I would advise you to confess your feelings to her. Do not postpone the expression of your feelings; do not let the disheartening feeling of self-doubt and fear persuade you to conceal your true emotions for her any longer. For the longer you lie in wait for her to act first, the further your mind will drive itself to entropy. However, I would also stress that you do have something to lose. Do not make the same mistake that I did in the past; do not make a sweeping gesture that forever closes the door upon friendship in the hopes of securing a relationship. Revealing too much of yourself in an instance can prove catastrophic to a friendship. Take your time in explaining your feelings and reservations to her rather than engaging in a frantic proclamation of your innermost feelings for her; express your desire for her to do whatever makes her happy. If she does not reciprocate your gesture, reassure her that the two of you can remain friends.

 

[WorldCritic]

Be yourself, don't blurt it out, and don't be pushy. Sorry I can't be more helpful.

 

[Verlander]

You're "hitting it off", yet she's your best friend? Yeah, you should take her out for a nice date, something you know she'd like, and then tell her. I'd just be up front and honest. Make sure you make it clear that it's how you feel, and that there's no pressure. Make sure you don't sound desperate, make sure that there is as little pressure as possible, make sure it's said in a happy situation, and make sure that you let her know how much her friendship means to you. A true friend will understand, and will be honest back at you. Do it right, and your friendship won't be affected at all. Good luck hombre