If the internet was a real place

[Fruitloops89]

If the internet were a real place....
The V for Vendetta masks would be fucking everywhere
It would be very loud
The porn section would be very sticky
Flame wars may actually include fire
Cats would be everywhere
There could actually be less racial slurs however

These were all I could think of right now

 

[M3707ik]

People say pron would be everywear. i say its like the inside of the earth, it makes up 99% but we dont see it everyday, i hope.

 

[jdog345]

4chan would be akin to a terrorist organization.

 

[A random person]

The intellectuals would be in the enlightened island of Wiki, youtube would be vegas, social networking sites would be homes and forums would be cities, everyone would be sexually liberated to say the least, there would be a variety of other continents and towns, and there would be the vast ocean which adventurers explore, finding new lands. And at the center of the world, there is a fabled mountain. Few dare to go there, for those who went came back with tales of horror, and some came back...changed. This mountain, is called /b/. It is both the scourge of the world and yet said to be what shaped much of it. Perhaps it used to be great, but got corrupted. Nobody knows.

 

[Soigieoto]

Dirty, dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty place, it would be like Japan oh snap ya i just went there

I take it you've never been to Japan. Its a lot cleaner than the Us...

 

[Kinguendo]

I'm pretty sure Dave Chapelle did a skit in which he illustrated exactly this. It was a pretty terrible place.

As for where we as Escapists would fit in. We'd be a snooty group of nerdy looking people sniffing at passersby and being generally elitist.
Generalization... I don't think we are elite as individuals, just as a forum on the whole.

Hell YEAH! Nailed it, oh man... if we were in the internet I would throw up and hand and go for the 5.

Haha, forum on the "whole"... what?

 

[TundraWolf08]

Dirty, dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty place, it would be like Japan oh snap ya i just went there

I take it you've never been to Japan. Its a lot cleaner than the Us...

Ecologically sure... but have you seen the stuff that comes out of peoples minds over there?

 

[SomeBritishDude]

I'd live in porn town.

 

[OMGaNOODLE]

Well, don't go at war with it. You'd be overwhelmed by their: VIAGRA 5 DOLLARS A PILL, FIND A SEX PARTNER NEAR YOU, CREDIT SCORE IMPROVEMENT, WOULD YOU LIKE TO INCREASE YOUR SIZE, and SMACK THAT HOE AND WIN AN iPOD. Not only would you lose all of your assets and monetary gains unwillingly, but you will also become slaves for their new porn sites developed every day.

Food would be comprised of online recipies, which means you would be eating a cake with one or two many cups of flour too much, or something that burns on your kitchen top outright.

Mind you, medical science would not be able to keep up with the viruses. Think about it.

 

[GodsOneMistake]

Dirty, dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty place, it would be like Japan oh snap ya i just went there

I take it you've never been to Japan. Its a lot cleaner than the Us...

It was a joke, and By dirty i didn't mean like dirt i meant dirty minded

 

[skcseth]

Just think of all the porn stars....

And then apply Rule 34... *shudders* Oh god.

 

[MasterStratus]

I would challenge Max to a fight.
Just for the hell of it.
Yeah, that's right, you heard me Max!
You and me, Myspace mountains, high noon!

 

[hxcfreak]

Tron or The Matrix take your pic

 

[Ossum]

Well, there'd be over 9000 people, the entire economy would be for the lulz, all hobbies would be either trolling, spawn camping, or noob hunting, Anonymous would be everywhere, penis size would depend entirely upon the number of times one was quoted by other people, there'd be no women but infinite porn, animals would talk in broken English, currency would be in Internets, all bases would belong to us, it would always be peanut butter jelly time, and nobody would die, they'd just an hero. And everybody would like Mudkips because they're for the win, but people DO NOT WANT Mr. Mime because he's NSFW.

Escapists would be the curious but detached onlookers peering down at the scene, while other new Escapists crawl from the burning wreckage that is Internet land. This is why they're called Escapists, as in "those who escape."

 

[matnatz]

Like Transmetropolitan. New comers will be punched in the face and mugged immediately, the metropolitan area of 4chan will be the city from the film Se7en. There will be no natural things, there'll only be metal tunnels, metal streets and to reach the Adult District you'll have to ride a giant underground train called the RedTube. All those dumb enough to admit to being under 18 will be refused admission.

Crime will be exetremely bad in some areas and not particuaraly great in others. The Admins will be a corrupt bunch, usually under the age of 12 and from eastern europe. They will hit all those who do not kiss their arse with a ban hammer.

The Google building will be a giant white monolith sitting in the centre of the city, from this building you can board various transports taking you to the ther sectors of the city.

The Escapist Space Station is exactly that, an orbiting space station built for the rich yuppies that orbits planet Internet.

 

[Naeo]

How many people live there?
About a billion, though there are several billion more robots.

What's it like for crime?
Think of the worst place you know. Then multiply that by Russian 4chan. Now we're getting close to one person's daily crime.

What does it look like?
A wasteland.

What's the housing like?
...housing? You mean like .com and .net and stuff?

What's the capital city?
Google, though the insurgents control a good portion and have their capital at 4chan.

And more importantly... Where do we Escapists fit in?
We're the educated, scholarly minority who is oppressed and hated by the rest of the internet.

 

[stormcaller]

I'd be living in the rich WoW suburb of MMO-City, sure the taxes are a ***** but it's a big area!

 

[thebestaround21]

I think it would be like that Chapelle's Show skit.

 

[matnatz]

Ca n anybody give me a link to the aforementioned Chapelle Show skit?