If You Could Hack Real Life

[Dorian Cornelius Jasper]

And I'm sure we all know that hacking real life is easy, all you need to do is learn Python.

Real programmers use butterflies.

 

[Insomniaku]

After an eternity of doing what so many others suggest, I'd begin to wonder what the point of it all was.

Then I might restart all of reality anew, and maybe have a go at creating a planet where a bunch of giant lizards rule the world. Before I get bored some millions of years later and decide that Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies.

Basically, after messing around with omnipotence that the ability to hack real life would imply for some odd billions of years (let's hack away Heat Death [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heat_death_of_the_universe], that's always a downer at parties), I'd spend a nearly incomprehensible amount of time, even compared to the geological scale, just being bored.

I would probably then attempt to reset everything, and wipe myself of all memories of my triumphs and the futility of untold aeons of perfect (and cognizant) reality manipulation, up to and including engineering the rise and fall of no less than four intergalactic religions based off of drunken ramblings I told to some alien on a hill. But then I would stop at just that point, and decide to carry my memories as proof of my folly and a reminder never again to usurp the station of Godhead with my magical reality-hacking powers. Instead, I would undo all of my mistakes and return reality to its rightful place.

And after I'd reset all of reality to where it was before my meddling with the unwritten laws of the universe had shattered all notions of causality in this space-time continuum, I'd post about my experiences on The Escapist's forums in order to warn any other would-be godlings against seeking the fate of facing the cold, brutal insanity of an entire universe at their beck and call.

Also, my genitalia would be suspiciously larger since before this topic's creation.

Congratulations! You've successfully blown my mind

 

[Insomniaku]

Hm. Hacking life...
Does that mean it'll be like something out of the Matrix? If that's so, I will totally download all of the world's martial arts abilities into my body. While I'm at it, why not download all the knowledge the world has to offer me?

your example is more like Torrenting life LOL

 

[olicon]

Heh..if I could change the rules of the world and fabric of reality itself? Well, let's just say magic won't be out of reach anymore.
And maybe I'll add some "charisma" point for myself, and modify a few girl's perception checks on me.

 

[Blaghman]

And I'm sure we all know that hacking real life is easy, all you need to do is learn Python.

Real programmers use butterflies.

But there's an emacs command that can do anything a butterfly can, C-x M-c M-butterfly.

 

[Insomniaku]

Id love to make my own save files XD

oh crap.. i shouldn't have burnt that house down, thank god i saved it

that would be genius... and would go great with Jasper's post: "Sick of it all? What's the point?" *RELOAD PREVIOUS SAVE*

 

[Dorian Cornelius Jasper]

But there's an emacs command that can do anything a butterfly can, C-x M-c M-butterfly.

Dammit, emacs.

EDIT:

*RELOAD PREVIOUS SAVE*

This, aside from the penis joke, was the entire point of my post, yes.

 

[Dorian Cornelius Jasper]

*delete*

 

[Tekrae]

I'd delete System32. Ahehehehehe...
Oh, and delete war.exe.

Also, I'd get myself a Phys gun, a Tool gun, and enable NoClip.

 

[_Janny_]

I'd remove the "homework.painintheass" file.
That and maybe the "idiot" folder.

I'll drink to that.

I'd delete my teachers and that annoying chick at my college that thinks she's the genius of the world. Also delete daytime, I'd love to live in the night forever, seems more fun and creative.

 

[Dorian Cornelius Jasper]

I'd remove the "homework.painintheass" file.
That and maybe the "idiot" folder.

I'll drink to that.

I'd delete my teachers and that annoying chick at my college that thinks she's the genius of the world. Also delete daytime, I'd love to live in the night forever, seems more fun and creative.

Gets VERY boring outside of cities though. Need to upload lots of newer content to make up for the lack of daytime.

 

[Soulreaverm]

And I'm sure we all know that hacking real life is easy, all you need to do is learn Python.

Real programmers use butterflies.

But there's an emacs command that can do anything a butterfly can, C-x M-c M-butterfly.

I think you guys have managed an almost perfect quote...

Anyway, the real question here is, what colour hat would you wear?
After that, the answers are pretty simple.

 

[Ace of Spades]

I'd fix my terrible eyesight, delete a few people I don't like, and I'd make myself and my friends and family essential characters, so they could only be knocked out.

 

[cuddly_tomato]

I'd hack into the human population and give them their fucking empathy back.

Sometimes it seems as if compassion is dying out on this earth, it depresses me no end.

 

[traceur_]

All for me, I'd rule the world and have every superpower I can think of and all the ones I can't. So yeh I am god and I'd turn myself into sonic, how fucking fun would that be!!!!!

 

[RetiarySword]

If you could hack real life what aspects of it would you change? For what purposes? For yourself? For a greater good? I realize that this is similar to a few posts before this but I want people to describe how they would go about hacking the world and in what form would it closely resemble something you saw in a video game/movie/book?

My only commands would be:

Population_decrease: 15%
Population_growth: 0.5%
Global_temp: reset
Carbon_emmision: 0.002%
Space_travel: enabled

Then we would be good for a while.

 

[WittyName]

Too many possibilities to type....

 

[mythbuster343]

I would make myself tougher than Chuck Norris, if thats possible

 

[pyros550]

Recreate the world to be like tv listings, living from programme to program, spoiling plot twists and stealing punchlines.

But then i'll be cancelled...