If You Were Admin of the Entire Internet ...

[werty10089]

I would use my powers as any man would, with massive bloodthirst and corruption. All websites would be massively trolled, all ignorant ramblers would be quelled by the ignorance of my merciless destructive abilities! Also, steal from the rich, give to the poor, help revolutions, make the world a better place, yada-yada. Negate any legal enforcement of the internet, and see what happens (with a guiding hand). Then scour the web incognito, looking for an apprentice to continue my legacy. Pretty basic, but of course I would dominate essential services on the internet, making ebay a not-for-profit, ect. All opinions will be tolerated, All trolling will be tolerated, life would go on.

 

[The Virgo]

1. So you say something, and then don't explain it? to top it off, you still try to make yourself sound smarter than me. lol.

What is there to explain, really? I've explained it all.

2. Insulting users over a non-serious thread is dignity? News to me.

Insulting a pirate who steals stuff ... just because he can? Or because ... what? That's dignity! There is no reason to pirate stuff. None at all. Especially since you don't seem to offer any kind of excuse for doing so.

3. You think that people won't find a way to get past any internet censor? Really? Do you have any idea how many times they've tried and failed?

That doesn't mean they one day can't. Actually, to be honest, I hope they just shut down the internet one day. I hasn't really done the world that much good, except help free-loading pirates (lets face it, that's what pirates are. Not meant to be insulting, just stating a basic fact) do their thing EASIER (there was piracy before, but it became easier in the digital age) and let people be idiots without fear of someone punching them in the face.

 

[Sassafrass]

lol, dont like it? there is the door....

I'm guessing he has been using the door, hence why he's only got 100 or so posts in about 9 months.

 

[Joccaren]

1. Clear out the trolls and abusive users from all sights (4Chan is unlikely to survive). Re-allow any funny trolls to access the Internet (4Chan reborn).
2. Shut down ALL game Publishers and ALL Digital distribution platforms (Steam, Origin, Impulse, ect.). Now all development teams are indie, but sadly there is almost nowhere for them to upload their work.
3. Take control of banks and transfer money to pay Devs if they make games. How much they get per game will differ dependent on how much I feel that game deserves (I would be generous towards innovation, and also towards games that are well received by the general public. Flat out copies of other games will not receive a lot of money) and start my own digital distribution platform that is allowed infinite bandwidth from all servers worldwide, with reasonable prices and every game ever made. No updates required to play, and you do not have to be online every time you want to play - only the first.
4. DLC would be repriced to appropriate levels.

After that, whatever I felt like.

 

[Robert632]

Probably start by banning anyone under 21 from having access

why? the internet isn't ALL R-rated

If you ever played a game that had a 12-year-old on it, you would know. -_- However, I would make it 18, not 21.

Have dedicated MLP sections for bronies to discuss it. Anyone found mentioning MLP outside of these sections gets instantly banned.

Oh God, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. It's not so much the fact that they're fans of a show designed around little girls' toys, so much as that they take their love of girly ponies to extremes. I've yet to meet a MLP fan who, on forums, didn't have a MLP avatar and, on TF2, as an example, didn't have an MLP spray.

I'm sure those people exist, but I've yet to meet one.

Also, fuck yo copyrights and whatnot, FREE SHIT FOR EVERYONE.

I saved YOU for last.

As a capitalist, businessman and someone who works in an industry which suffers from piracy, I would like to inform you that THAT SHIT DOESN'T HAPPEN THAT WAY.

Everything can't be free, at least not in the kind of society we live in. And also, what your dumb ass doesn't realize, copyrights and "whatnot" are highly important. It tries to prevent slobs like you from profiting from the work of others.

And really, if you got yourself a job and saved up, you could have the money to afford things without having to resort to piracy. Can't pay $60.00 for Skyrim? Here's what I do - wait. Give it about a year and when Steam has it on sale. It'll be about $9.99, which is something I'm sure you'll be able to afford ... IF that much! Deus Ex: HR was on sale for $16.10 last night, instead of $49.99! Sure, you won't be the first one to have them, but then again, you can say you rightfully own it and that you're not some giant variation of a leech.

Congrats. You've now met one.

O.T: Obviously I would become a corrupt son of a ***** who demands that everyone on the internet be what I deem to be good, and anyone caught putting a toe out of line gets insta-banned forever, even if they broke rules before they were created.Also, fanbases of stuff I don't like would be forced into secrecy, and any expression of being a fan of it would be worth an insta-ban, because that's 100% fair.

[sub][sub]/mocking all of you "dictator" people. I'd more then likely do next to nothing. [/sub][/sub]

 

[dedem1315]

Also, fuck yo copyrights and whatnot, FREE SHIT FOR EVERYONE.

I saved YOU for last.

As a capitalist, businessman and someone who works in an industry which suffers from piracy, I would like to inform you that THAT SHIT DOESN'T HAPPEN THAT WAY.

Everything can't be free, at least not in the kind of society we live in. And also, what your dumb ass doesn't realize, copyrights and "whatnot" are highly important. It tries to prevent slobs like you from profiting from the work of others.

And really, if you got yourself a job and saved up, you could have the money to afford things without having to resort to piracy. Can't pay $60.00 for Skyrim? Here's what I do - wait. Give it about a year and when Steam has it on sale. It'll be about $9.99, which is something I'm sure you'll be able to afford ... IF that much! Deus Ex: HR was on sale for $16.10 last night, instead of $49.99! Sure, you won't be the first one to have them, but then again, you can say you rightfully own it and that you're not some giant variation of a leech.

Wow. I have never seen someone get so worked up over a hypothetical situation. Just...chill, dude.

On topic, Westboro Baptist Church's site would go down faster than they can picket a funeral. Also, I would make zynga....disappear...

 

[SneeringCanuck]

1. So you say something, and then don't explain it? to top it off, you still try to make yourself sound smarter than me. lol.

What is there to explain, really? I've explained it all.

2. Insulting users over a non-serious thread is dignity? News to me.

Insulting a pirate who steals stuff ... just because he can? Or because ... what? That's dignity! There is no reason to pirate stuff. None at all. Especially since you don't seem to offer any kind of excuse for doing so.

3. You think that people won't find a way to get past any internet censor? Really? Do you have any idea how many times they've tried and failed?

That doesn't mean they one day can't. Actually, to be honest, I hope they just shut down the internet one day. I hasn't really done the world that much good, except help free-loading pirates (lets face it, that's what pirates are. Not meant to be insulting, just stating a basic fact) do their thing EASIER (there was piracy before, but it became easier in the digital age) and let people be idiots without fear of someone punching them in the face.

-You've explained fuck all, all you've done is insult me and whine about piracy.
-I never said I pirated anything, I just have no problems with others doing so, I prefer to have physical copies of films and games, hence why I don't pirate.
-"Just because it's failed every time so far doesn't mean it won't work eventually!" is what I took from that.

 

[Itsthefuzz]

I'd probably only just make it so I don't see messages from people I'm not fond of. Bronies/Channers/RPers/Etc. I basically would just make them invisible to me.

 

[The Virgo]

I've yet to meet a MLP fan who, on forums, didn't have a MLP avatar and, on TF2, as an example, didn't have an MLP spray.

I'm sure those people exist, but I've yet to meet one.

Congrats. You've now met one.

Greetings! I'm glad I've now met one. And, because you enjoy it without showing your love of it everywhere, I respect you liking the show and you may enjoy it in peace.

See how easy life is?

Wow. I have never seen someone get so worked up over a hypothetical situation. Just...chill, dude.

Hypothetical situation? There's nothing hypothetical about piracy, which was the main point of that post.

I don't believe in getting anything for free, because nothing is free. Especially not free to make. This list goes on and on forever, really, so I'm not going to get into it.

But basically, there is no real excuse to pirate. Too expensive? Save up and wait until it gets cheaper (what I do). Want to protest of something in the game? Don't buy it. Pirate stuff because you can? Well ... if I had ultimate internet Admin powers, I would ban them forever.

There just is none. That was the point of that thread.

 

[Crazy]

Post porn everywhere, especially on uptight websites. Then rid all the websites that disgusts me, which won't be much. After that, go on an internet-wide trolling spree, starting with the removal of Facebook and Twitter. Make my website genocide way to gaming sites, like this one and Gamefaqs. Afterwards, destroy every single website that I come across, leaving only Google around until the end. Then, I shall leave Google where it is, but once you enter a search you will be brought to the one remaining webpage available: The Youtube Rickroll video. Enjoy the internet that I leave behind, for I shall recreate it in my image in a later date, kiddies.

 

[The Virgo]

-You've explained fuck all, all you've done is insult me and whine about piracy.
-I never said I pirated anything, I just have no problems with others doing so, I prefer to have physical copies of films and games, hence why I don't pirate.

... Sigh. Then why didn't you just say that in the beginning instead of carrying on implying you did? You could have saved everyone a lot of headaches and aggravation by posting that wonderful bit of information one hour sooner.

And it's not "whining". It's called "actually giving a damn about something", which is called "the making of money". And piracy doesn't make anybody money, except lazy pirates who are merely stealing oxygen in the world.

 

[Rule Britannia]

Find the where the child porn watchers live and shit and give the addresses and proof to the FBI or CIA or whatever and have them arrested.

Shutdown all troll websites.

A long term goal would be banning people on youtube for trolling,flaming etc.

 

[Robert632]

I've yet to meet a MLP fan who, on forums, didn't have a MLP avatar and, on TF2, as an example, didn't have an MLP spray.

I'm sure those people exist, but I've yet to meet one.

Congrats. You've now met one.

Greetings! I'm glad I've now met one. And, because you enjoy it without showing your love of it everywhere, I respect you liking the show and you may enjoy it in peace.

See how easy life is?

Huh. Y'know I meant to come across as offended, right? Just making sure that's clear.

 

[Digitaldreamer7]

I'd change nothing. Seriously. Other then move EVERYTHING to html 5. I'd change nothing. The only thing I would do is protect it from ANY censorship at all. As is, if you post something on the internet that is terribly illegal (not counting piracy because it's legality depends on teh country in which the user/pirate resides) (edit for possible mod wrath clarification: not advocating piracy, just saying that countries should be responsible for enforcing it's own laws in it's own boarders, not the internet gods) some 14 year old kid or some fat assed mouthbreather will hunt you down and turn you in "for teh lulz." Leave it as is and let the authorities in the user's country deal with his/her illegal activities.

Don't fix what ain't broke. Just protect it from any and all assaults.

That doesn't mean they one day can't. Actually, to be honest, I hope they just shut down the internet one day. I hasn't really done the world that much good, except help free-loading pirates (lets face it, that's what pirates are. Not meant to be insulting, just stating a basic fact) do their thing EASIER (there was piracy before, but it became easier in the digital age) and let people be idiots without fear of someone punching them in the face.

Really? the internet hasn't done any good in the world? Because there are billions of people who would beg to differ. The same people who use the internet for evil also use it for good. The people who have no idea how to use it for evil use it for good. It enriches lives, helps people connect, allows for a better stream of news then any media company in existence, it is a huge proponent for free speech (it's not always good speech or what you want to hear but it's still free and open), boosts economies (e-trade), etc.


Were you around before the world wide web? When piracy was still easy if you knew where to look and who to dial into? If anything it's made it easier to catch pirates. Yes it's made it easier for the lay-person to pirate things.. But the ones who know what they are doing will do it just as easy before, during, and after the internet if the day ever comes and still not get caught. Again i'm not advocating piracy at all here so don't take me wrong. I just think you have your facts mixed up pretty badly.

 

[almostgold]

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I believe in Net Neutrality

 

[brainslurper]

Origin. IT MUST DIE!!!!

 

[Berenzen]

That doesn't mean they one day can't. Actually, to be honest, I hope they just shut down the internet one day. It hasn't really done the world that much good, except help free-loading pirates (lets face it, that's what pirates are. Not meant to be insulting, just stating a basic fact) do their thing EASIER (there was piracy before, but it became easier in the digital age) and let people be idiots without fear of someone punching them in the face.

You haven't really been on the internet outside of message boards have you?

That statement is probably one of the idiotic things I've read. The internet is one of the best innovations that has been made. It allows for the sharing of ideas, knowledge on a much greater scale than has been seen before. And it's growing!

I personally have never been without the internet, I was born in 1992, and by the time I could comprehendwhat the internet was, it was starting to get big. That being said, hearing various stories about it from my parents really made me appreciate what I had. You couldn't share ideas with other people across the world, unless you went to a conference, and even then you didn't really get to know them or collaborate with them. Now you can get research papers that can have an author from London, Toronto, Hong Kong and Los Angeles. Honestly, reading your list of what you would do with the internet, I get the feeling that you support SOPA, you don't care about the freedom of the internet, just how it affects you.

And as for your rant of MLP and how it should only be put on certain sites, why? We happen to enjoy it, and we're proud of it, why shouldn't we be allowed to post our pride of it? Simply because others might not want to see it. Too damned bad, I'm pretty sure racists don't want to see people of other creeds and colours around, yet they have to. I'm pretty sure that you can do it to.


On topic, I'd probably just leave the internet to do it's thing other than protect it from censorship/ break current censorships, maybe ban the stuff that's really bad: pedophilic sites and the like, but other than that, nothing.

 

[SneeringCanuck]

-You've explained fuck all, all you've done is insult me and whine about piracy.
-I never said I pirated anything, I just have no problems with others doing so, I prefer to have physical copies of films and games, hence why I don't pirate.

... Sigh. Then why didn't you just say that in the beginning instead of carrying on implying you did? You could have saved everyone a lot of headaches and aggravation by posting that wonderful bit of information one hour sooner.

And it's not "whining". It's called "actually giving a damn about something", which is called "the making of money". And piracy doesn't make anybody money, except lazy pirates who are merely stealing oxygen in the world.

-Because it wasn't important.
-And quite frankly, yes you are whining, I've yet to see any serious damage caused by piracy (last time I checked, the three biggest pirated industries, music, video gaming and films were still doing fine), opposing something on principle is one thing, acting like an ass (petty namecalling, 'merely stealing oxygen' etc) is another.

 

[Evil Smurf]

And finally, I'd install Linux on EVERYTHING.

amen brother, I would love to see a toaster running linux

 

[Some_weirdGuy]

-You've explained fuck all, all you've done is insult me and whine about piracy.
-I never said I pirated anything, I just have no problems with others doing so, I prefer to have physical copies of films and games, hence why I don't pirate.
-"Just because it's failed every time so far doesn't mean it won't work eventually!" is what I took from that.

... You're actually arguing that he needs to explain to you what's wrong with piracy in a society that runs on capital? .. you're.. i - ... really? Really?

Though it seems (I really hope) that you were just saying it to be difficult and not seriously lacking understanding on the issues with it.