I'm a fairly conservative guy, but I am still flabergasted by people who think gay is a choice

[bdcjacko]

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

So, that is a fact, a person can be born blind, deaf, without an arm, or a million other thing could go wrong, but there is absolutely no chance that a "wire" could across and make them want to not make babies but could be gay by birth.

*I should mention I'm not saying being gay is a birth defect anymore than say have a predisposition to having a preference for vanilla over chocolate is birth defect.

Nature doesn't make people gay. Its not genetic, its nurture.

But just to rival your analogy:
A person who is born without an arm cannot decide to grow one. Even if someone were to be born with an inclintion towards the opposite sex, it would become a choice when they chose to act upon it, and identify themselves as gay.

So you are saying, there is no possible way a person can be born with a sexual preference for their own gender, but literally everything else can go wrong.

So, when did you make the decision to be straight?

 

[Arafiro]

As I read in another thread: Why can't it be both? Born gay and gay by choice?

It already is. "Gay by choice" is simply "born bisexual".
If you can "choose" whether to be straight or gay then you're bisexual, simple as.

 

[ExaltedK9]

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

So, that is a fact, a person can be born blind, deaf, without an arm, or a million other thing could go wrong, but there is absolutely no chance that a "wire" could across and make them want to not make babies but could be gay by birth.

*I should mention I'm not saying being gay is a birth defect anymore than say have a predisposition to having a preference for vanilla over chocolate is birth defect.

Nature doesn't make people gay. Its not genetic, its nurture.

But just to rival your analogy:
A person who is born without an arm cannot decide to grow one. Even if someone were to be born with an inclintion towards the opposite sex, it would become a choice when they chose to act upon it, and identify themselves as gay.

So you are saying, there is no possible way a person can be born with a sexual preference for their own gender, but literally everything else can go wrong.

So, when did you make the decision to be straight?

I didn't. I simply am.

I don't have a double standard, it's just the way we're designed. I'm a christian, and I believe that gays choose to be so. I don't demonize them for it though.

And I didn't say it was impossible that someone be born with a sexual preference to the same gender (though it would be rare). But they wouldn't technically be... vanilla lovers until they decided to ...eat some vanilla?

 

[dumbledoresarmy101]

Okay, so I'm not sure if this argument has been stated or not, but here goes.

Sexuality is NOT a choice.
For the straight people on this forum, I want you to try something. As of this moment, decide you are gay. Decide you no longer like women, and will only be attracted to men for the rest of your life. Then try to check out some guys sexually.

I'll give you a minute..
...
Couldn't do it, could you?

Sexuality is not something chosen, I don't know how someone turns out with their sexuality, but it is definitely NOT chosen. Why would someone choose that? They are ridiculed, hated, made of fun off, bullied. People often commit suicide over being gay. So if it was a choice, why wouldn't they just say "Okay, I'm getting ready to kill myself over being gay, maybe I'll be straight again!"

It just isn't feasible to think sexuality is a choice, because no one would choose to be gay. It's as simple as that

 

[Ariyura]

Nature doesn't make people gay. Its not genetic, its nurture.

But just to rival your analogy:
A person who is born without an arm cannot decide to grow one. Even if someone were to be born with an inclintion towards the opposite sex, it would become a choice when they chose to act upon it, and identify themselves as gay.

So you are saying, there is no possible way a person can be born with a sexual preference for their own gender, but literally everything else can go wrong.

So, when did you make the decision to be straight?

I'm not sure about choosing to be straight but I do wonder if it is choice. In college, I chose to experiment with women, decided it wasn't what I was looking for and started dating men again. Does this mean I have homosexual tendencies ingrained in me, or did I decide to try something different.

 

[katsumoto03]

You must remember the number one rule of life: Some people are just absolutely retarded. Some of the things they spew out of their mouthes have no correlation with intelligent thought. What you are hearing from these people is simply verbal bile.

 

[alittlepepper]

Someone may or may not have already said this, but as a bisexual my feeling on it is this. Sexuality both is and isn't a choice, and by that I mean this: You don't choose your sexuality. You're born with that. The choice comes in whether you accept and embrace it or not.
Anyone that thinks a straight person would ever, EVER, in their right mind wake up one morning and willingly choose to become a part of one of the most socially ostracized groups in history is pants-on-head retarded. People that are homosexual have a tremendous challenge when it comes to whether or not to accept who they really are, and that's where the choice is.
Really, it isn't a choice. But acting on it and accepting it certainly is. And it will continue to be as long as bigoted jerkoffs continue to discriminate against things they don't understand, i.e. forever.

 

[dumbledoresarmy101]

It IS a choice. Humans are attracted to the opposite sex by instinct. Any deviation IS a choice.

I have nothing against gays, but their sexual orientation is voluntary.

Thank you for your completely groundless assumption.

Hi. I'm a homosexual. I did not choose this.

Please do tell me again how you know better than me, I am riveted.

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

I'm sorry, but this argument is COMPLETELY... for lack of a better word, stupid.
First of all, he's homosexual. I think he'd know whether he chose it or not, it's his body, his mind, not yours.
Secondly, we have a SEXUAL DRIVE, not a want to procreate. If every human wanted to procreate, and that was the only reason to have sex, how do you explain casual sex? Or people who have NEVER wanted children, they still want sex. Being homosexual is a sexual drive toward the same sex. Just like people can have a sexual drive toward animals, and in very rare cases to objects, do you believe all of them chose it too? As I stated before, try and choose to be gay, see how it works out for you, just as a test. And I'm sure you'll say something like "the choice has to be made over a long period of time and/or sub-consiously"
If it was made over time, you have to think about it. Sexual drive starts when a human hits puberty, for a male lets say 10-11 years old. Not much time to "decide" to be gay, seeing as most people have attraction to the same sex in their teen years. Secondly the sub-consiously, IF you believe they make it without knowing, prove it.
And if you believe they just "decided" to be gay one day, why wouldn't they change their mind back when they get hated, and are lonley?

 

[joshuaayt]

It is so a choice; you can try it out right now. (This is a guide for straight men, straight women will have to change the search queries accordingly)

Go to google images, and type in "hulking sexy manly man". Now, before you press enter, close your eyes. Tell yourself- many times- that you are gay. I hear that self-flagellation during this stage helps immensely.

Now, press enter, open your eyes, and look at your hulking sexy manly man. Voila! You are gay. I hope you have many good years.

 

[dumbledoresarmy101]

Nature doesn't make people gay. Its not genetic, its nurture.

But just to rival your analogy:
A person who is born without an arm cannot decide to grow one. Even if someone were to be born with an inclintion towards the opposite sex, it would become a choice when they chose to act upon it, and identify themselves as gay.

So you are saying, there is no possible way a person can be born with a sexual preference for their own gender, but literally everything else can go wrong.

So, when did you make the decision to be straight?

I'm not sure about choosing to be straight but I do wonder if it is choice. In college, I chose to experiment with women, decided it wasn't what I was looking for and started dating men again. Does this mean I have homosexual tendencies ingrained in me, or did I decide to try something different.

I think everyone goes through a point of confusion in their lives, and I don't believe it means you have homosexual tendencies. I believe it's because we know the option of homosexuality is there, and I think people often second guess what they do in life, as reflected in people looking back on their lives wondering if they should have done something differently, and that either experimenting, or in my case just wondering and being confused for awhile, is completely natural and happens to almost everyone, but more as a comfort to the person, so they know they are right.

 

[ExaltedK9]

It IS a choice. Humans are attracted to the opposite sex by instinct. Any deviation IS a choice.

I have nothing against gays, but their sexual orientation is voluntary.

Thank you for your completely groundless assumption.

Hi. I'm a homosexual. I did not choose this.

Please do tell me again how you know better than me, I am riveted.

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

I'm sorry, but this argument is COMPLETELY... for lack of a better word, stupid.
First of all, he's homosexual. I think he'd know whether he chose it or not, it's his body, his mind, not yours.
Secondly, we have a SEXUAL DRIVE, not a want to procreate. If every human wanted to procreate, and that was the only reason to have sex, how do you explain casual sex? Or people who have NEVER wanted children, they still want sex. Being homosexual is a sexual drive toward the same sex. Just like people can have a sexual drive toward animals, and in very rare cases to objects, do you believe all of them chose it too? As I stated before, try and choose to be gay, see how it works out for you, just as a test. And I'm sure you'll say something like "the choice has to be made over a long period of time and/or sub-consiously"
If it was made over time, you have to think about it. Sexual drive starts when a human hits puberty, for a male lets say 10-11 years old. Not much time to "decide" to be gay, seeing as most people have attraction to the same sex in their teen years. Secondly the sub-consiously, IF you believe they make it without knowing, prove it.
And if you believe they just "decided" to be gay one day, why wouldn't they change their mind back when they get hated, and are lonley?

I know hes a homosexual, he told me. And I already said that he knows more about his sexual orientation than I ever could. I would be a fucking lunatic if I said otherwise.

I'm sorry, my words were poorly chosen. People don't just have sex for the sole purpose of having babies. But our sex drives are there for a reason, that reason being the survival of the human race. We are, by default, attracted to the opposite sex for this reason. But not everybody pursues a sexual conquest just to create a little bundle of joy.

And people's tendencies towards the same gender, animals, and objects are fetishes, being voluntary.

And if I wanted to, I could totally be gay, because its a choice.

As for gays not caving under scrutiny, (some do) if they chose to be gay, then they probably like it, and want to continue their romantic interest in the same sex. Thats my best guess anyways.

But lets please try to keep this civil. As I've said many a time now, I am not hating on gays. I could easily say that your argument is "stupid" too, but I'm trying to take all things into consideration, as should you.

 

[dumbledoresarmy101]

It IS a choice. Humans are attracted to the opposite sex by instinct. Any deviation IS a choice.

I have nothing against gays, but their sexual orientation is voluntary.

Thank you for your completely groundless assumption.

Hi. I'm a homosexual. I did not choose this.

Please do tell me again how you know better than me, I am riveted.

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

I'm sorry, but this argument is COMPLETELY... for lack of a better word, stupid.
First of all, he's homosexual. I think he'd know whether he chose it or not, it's his body, his mind, not yours.
Secondly, we have a SEXUAL DRIVE, not a want to procreate. If every human wanted to procreate, and that was the only reason to have sex, how do you explain casual sex? Or people who have NEVER wanted children, they still want sex. Being homosexual is a sexual drive toward the same sex. Just like people can have a sexual drive toward animals, and in very rare cases to objects, do you believe all of them chose it too? As I stated before, try and choose to be gay, see how it works out for you, just as a test. And I'm sure you'll say something like "the choice has to be made over a long period of time and/or sub-consiously"
If it was made over time, you have to think about it. Sexual drive starts when a human hits puberty, for a male lets say 10-11 years old. Not much time to "decide" to be gay, seeing as most people have attraction to the same sex in their teen years. Secondly the sub-consiously, IF you believe they make it without knowing, prove it.
And if you believe they just "decided" to be gay one day, why wouldn't they change their mind back when they get hated, and are lonley?

I know hes a homosexual, he told me. And I already said that he knows more about his sexual orientation than I ever could. I would be a fucking lunatic if I said otherwise.

I'm sorry, my words were poorly chosen. People don't just have sex for the sole purpose of having babies. But our sex drives are there for a reason, that reason being the survival of the human race. We are, by default, attracted to the opposite sex for this reason. But not everybody pursues a sexual conquest just to create a little bundle of joy.

And people's tendencies towards the same gender, animals, and objects are fetishes, being voluntary.

And if I wanted to, I could totally be gay, because its a choice.

As for gays not caving under scrutiny, (some do) if they chose to be gay, then they probably like it, and want to continue their romantic interest in the same sex. Thats my best guess anyways.

But lets please try to keep this civil. As I've said many a time now, I am not hating on gays. I could easily say that your argument is "stupid" too, but I'm trying to take all things into consideration, as should you.

I'm sorry, I probably could be more civil, but it's moronic arguments like this that make gays hated. People believe they just choose to be different, and people are scared of things that are different, and lash out at that. If people just accepted that they didn't choose it anymore then I chose that my eyes are blue, it would be easier to accept.
First of all, fetishes aren't chosen, fetishes are a inward sexual desire that we cannot control. For example, I have a fetish for asses and legs. I couldn't suddenly say "I'm bored with those, I'm going to have a fetish for pencil sharpeners now" and have it be true. I could try, but I'd be lying to myself.
Toward your comment of people liking the scrutiny, I can provide a personal example. A close friend of mine was suicidal for a long time over homosexuality. He tried being with women in order to "fight" the homosexuality, but he couldn't do it. He was utterly repulsed by the idea of being sexually involved with a woman. So he told people he was gay and regretted it for a long time. He got hate mail, people harassed him at school, he got beat up etc. It was only when he almost killed himself, that he realized he needed to stop caring what others thought. It took him awhile, but now he doesn't care that others hate him for it. But he does not get any enjoyment out of it. Too this day he still wishes he could be straight, so he doesn't have to deal with everyone, but he can't do that anymore than I can grow an extra limb.

 

[gl1koz3]

Yes. It is a choice. But not in the sense that you would choose between chocolate or vanilla. This is a far more difficult choice to change.

As a small disclaimer before I put my opinion down, I'm not comparing homosexuality to depression as if they were both mental illness. Homosexuality is in no way, shape, or form really an illness. Now that that's out of the way.

I would compare Homosexuality to Depression. As someone who has suffered from depression for the last 5 years (severe depression mind you), I know first hand the effects that depression has on an individuals body and mind. However, people have overcome depression out of sheer willpower without ever needing a drug or therapy session. Homosexuality I believe is similar in a sense. I believe someone ultimately could choose whether they wished to be homosexual or not. However, the amount of sheer willpower needed to overcome their own body's lean would be comparable to that of overcoming severe depression.

This is just my opinion on the matter. Do I believe it's a choice? Yes and no, in the sense that it could be changed if the individual wanted to change it enough and had the sheer willpower to overcome their own body and mind. However, this would be the rarest of the rare. Once the body and mind decide upon something it's virtually impossible to just pull a 180. You can't just stop doing what they want you to do.

Again, just to clarify, Homosexuality and depression are two separate topics, one can render people unable to live a normal life, while the other is a sexual preference that should have no hold on a person's ability to live a normal life.

I don't think that's a choice to not be homosexual, but just suppressing your sexuality so you don't act like a homosexual. I can die my hair brown instead of it's usual blonde color, act like how people with brown hair act, and say I choose to not be a blonde, but that's just suppressing my hair and naturally, I'd still be a blonde no matter how much I try to hide it.

Oh believe me, I'm not saying it's the right way to do it, nor am I saying that the individual will rid themselves of their natural preference. More a statement of anything is possible than anything else. I wouldn't want an individual to suppress their natural sexuality simply because someone says they should.

Well, you got the emotional attraction covered. But wasn't the physical attraction what really counts? And (not a pro in medical stuff here) as far as I know, the pathways in brain form during childhood (some may be hard-predetermined pre-birth)... The neurons physically align to form the connections. Now, these connections define you. I guess, in some cases you can try working with memory to teach the neurons go around some pathways, but wouldn't it be still a handicapped experience, given that the pathways are, as per how electricity works, the fastest routes to how accomplish tasks or just how to work at all... And they'd be substituted for long detours. That would mean sloppiness... in bed... (and we all know this is the ultimate part of what actually determines the orientation).

 

[ExaltedK9]

It IS a choice. Humans are attracted to the opposite sex by instinct. Any deviation IS a choice.

I have nothing against gays, but their sexual orientation is voluntary.

Thank you for your completely groundless assumption.

Hi. I'm a homosexual. I did not choose this.

Please do tell me again how you know better than me, I am riveted.

Not much I can do but restate what I've already said. Being humans, our minds are hard-wired to want to procreate. If you're attracted to the same sex, then it is by your own choice.

I don't see how that is baseless (the base for my statement being right there, for all to see) or an assumption, because no assuming was involved.

I never said that I knew better than you, but thanks for jumping the over-sensetive gun. Yea, you do know more about your sexual orientation than me... Because you've chosen it.

Please don't be mad at me though, I don't really care which gender you've chosen to pursue.

I'm sorry, but this argument is COMPLETELY... for lack of a better word, stupid.
First of all, he's homosexual. I think he'd know whether he chose it or not, it's his body, his mind, not yours.
Secondly, we have a SEXUAL DRIVE, not a want to procreate. If every human wanted to procreate, and that was the only reason to have sex, how do you explain casual sex? Or people who have NEVER wanted children, they still want sex. Being homosexual is a sexual drive toward the same sex. Just like people can have a sexual drive toward animals, and in very rare cases to objects, do you believe all of them chose it too? As I stated before, try and choose to be gay, see how it works out for you, just as a test. And I'm sure you'll say something like "the choice has to be made over a long period of time and/or sub-consiously"
If it was made over time, you have to think about it. Sexual drive starts when a human hits puberty, for a male lets say 10-11 years old. Not much time to "decide" to be gay, seeing as most people have attraction to the same sex in their teen years. Secondly the sub-consiously, IF you believe they make it without knowing, prove it.
And if you believe they just "decided" to be gay one day, why wouldn't they change their mind back when they get hated, and are lonley?

I know hes a homosexual, he told me. And I already said that he knows more about his sexual orientation than I ever could. I would be a fucking lunatic if I said otherwise.

I'm sorry, my words were poorly chosen. People don't just have sex for the sole purpose of having babies. But our sex drives are there for a reason, that reason being the survival of the human race. We are, by default, attracted to the opposite sex for this reason. But not everybody pursues a sexual conquest just to create a little bundle of joy.

And people's tendencies towards the same gender, animals, and objects are fetishes, being voluntary.

And if I wanted to, I could totally be gay, because its a choice.

As for gays not caving under scrutiny, (some do) if they chose to be gay, then they probably like it, and want to continue their romantic interest in the same sex. Thats my best guess anyways.

But lets please try to keep this civil. As I've said many a time now, I am not hating on gays. I could easily say that your argument is "stupid" too, but I'm trying to take all things into consideration, as should you.

I'm sorry, I probably could be more civil, but it's moronic arguments like this that make gays hated. People believe they just choose to be different, and people are scared of things that are different, and lash out at that. If people just accepted that they didn't choose it anymore then I chose that my eyes are blue, it would be easier to accept.
First of all, fetishes aren't chosen, fetishes are a inward sexual desire that we cannot control. For example, I have a fetish for asses and legs. I couldn't suddenly say "I'm bored with those, I'm going to have a fetish for pencil sharpeners now" and have it be true. I could try, but I'd be lying to myself.
Toward your comment of people liking the scrutiny, I can provide a personal example. A close friend of mine was suicidal for a long time over homosexuality. He tried being with women in order to "fight" the homosexuality, but he couldn't do it. He was utterly repulsed by the idea of being sexually involved with a woman. So he told people he was gay and regretted it for a long time. He got hate mail, people harassed him at school, he got beat up etc. It was only when he almost killed himself, that he realized he needed to stop caring what others thought. It took him awhile, but now he doesn't care that others hate him for it. But he does not get any enjoyment out of it. Too this day he still wishes he could be straight, so he doesn't have to deal with everyone, but he can't do that anymore than I can grow an extra limb.

Yay, my opinions have gone from stupid to moronic! This civility thing must not have taken hold yet.

Well since thats already out the window... I think its a fucking generalization to say that "the big bad straights are afraid of us sexual wave-makers!"

And I did not say that they must have enjoyed the scrutiny, I was talking about being gay. If they chose it, then they must enjoy it, and want to continue to be gay, was what I was trying to convey.

Thanks for sharing that incredible story of self-realization, but it holds no credibility with me. A man can talk himself into just about anything, including that his homosexuality is not a choice. I'm sure he believes that it isn't.

 

[SinisterGehe]

It's still not proven why some people are gay (I don't think); any theory could be correcic

Note: This is logical reasoning, not a Scientific method I am not qualified on that field!
It is a neurological condition (not in negative way, I just don't know better word to call it), if we think being straight as a normal state (some people can argue here again, but just look how nature works majority of it is A + B = C, few species are exception). Every action of person is somehow connected to the brain and central nerve system, but we have proven even if person will be paralyzed head down they will still be that personality that they were. In brains we have a area that controls our sexual behavior, it extremely primitive neurological device (I don't remember name of it). So if everything that makes person like he/she is located in hes brains, if we assume that being straight is natural, the logical answer would be; that being gay/bi/... is a neurological condition (still I don't know better world for it).

I am not bashing gay/bi/... here, calling them sick of anything I am just doing a logical reasoning here. I am not in position to say anyone is unnatural since I am also, because being asexual is not normal by natural standards.
I respect everyone who respects me and everyone who stays the hell out of my life.
What people like OP mentioned should do is to accept everyone because they ain't going anywhere and the new open social network will encourage people to come out as they really are. But it is not my position to tell them how to live or think.

 

[scorptatious]

The whole "Being gay is a choice" argument is flawed in itself. Unless you are bi-sexual, why would you want to have someone of the same sex have sex with you if you are interested in the opposite sex? I can't really see myself doing something like that. At least not easily.

 

[quhouv vhqwiufv qwiu]

I am gay so I can actually tell people that it isn't a choice. I really can't stand people who ask me when I decided to turn gay; I ask them when they decided to turn straight.

 

[M Rotter]

i just think its weird that some of the people who do say its "unnatural" also say its a choice. Unnatural implies that they are mutants, which means there's something different about their DNA. So whenever someone says that i chuckle because with that logic they'd also hate anyone with a genetic disorder (and im not saying being gay is a genetic disorder by the way, just that their logic is faulty)

 

[blank0000]

I don't think whether its a choice or not should matter. An individuals sexual affiliation is not harmful to anyone and doesn't effect anyone elses rights. I don't care if its something your born with or an acquired preference, they're still gay/ lesbian annnnnnnnnnnnd I don't think it's a huge deal.

 

[Kuroneko97]

Let me put it this way: I very do believe I am addicted to soda and candy. I find it hard to go without it. In fact, I am currently without soda and candy, and I feel miserable when I remember that I don't have any coke or Lifesavers to shove down my throat.

And I'm a heterosexual girl that is also turned on by breasts. I love guys. I've been told I'm boy crazy. I dream of being pounded in my snootch. But I often find myself looking at tits and going "wow." Do I want to look at tits? No. But I can't change my interest in them.

So as to not be completely scorning myself, I blame my fixation on boobs on Anime. more than half of them are filled with jiggling melons.

And so I think being gay is like being addicted to something, or having an attraction to something. You can't really change the fact that you enjoy something. So if a chick likes chicks, or a dude like dudes, then they simply enjoy that.

That's my argument. It's my opinion.