"I'm Bi"
- Thread starter smallthemouse
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one: its WAY harder to tell if someone is bi than if someone is gay or straight. if they are with a guy you assume gay, if they are with a girl you assume straight (assuming we are talking about a guy) with by people you REALLY have to ask. plus i have a feeling there are even more closeted bi guys than gay guys and they feel safer discussing it on the internet
A lot of people who feel they can't admit to things in their real life find a release for it on the internet, so it could be that you've met a lot of bisexual people in real life who wouldn't ever admit to it out of some sort of fear of being persecuted.
The Kinsey scale of sexuality also suggests that you can be bisexual to a certain degree, that is to say heterosexual but with bisexual leanings or vice versa. Some people criticse his results but I've always thought they were at least a sound basis. So to take it further some people who might think they are dead centre on the Kinsey scale are in fact closer to one side or the other, which doesn't mean they aren't bisexual, just that they aren't as bisexual as it is possible to be.
And also, some people mistake romantic attraction for sexual attraction, which is what I did when I was younger. You find members of the same sex attractive, but don't want to have sex with them, but because they are attractive to you that must mean you're bisexual right? Well maybe not actually, you could be bi-romantic, but not bi-sexual. The difference being sexual attraction, the desire to want to have sex with, as opposed to the various other things we have decided must go with sexual attraction.
The Kinsey scale of sexuality also suggests that you can be bisexual to a certain degree, that is to say heterosexual but with bisexual leanings or vice versa. Some people criticse his results but I've always thought they were at least a sound basis. So to take it further some people who might think they are dead centre on the Kinsey scale are in fact closer to one side or the other, which doesn't mean they aren't bisexual, just that they aren't as bisexual as it is possible to be.
And also, some people mistake romantic attraction for sexual attraction, which is what I did when I was younger. You find members of the same sex attractive, but don't want to have sex with them, but because they are attractive to you that must mean you're bisexual right? Well maybe not actually, you could be bi-romantic, but not bi-sexual. The difference being sexual attraction, the desire to want to have sex with, as opposed to the various other things we have decided must go with sexual attraction.
Thats another thing, how bisexual do you have to be to consider yourself so? Like I said before, I believe you have to be willing to perform sexual acts comfortably with both genders to consider yourself bisexual. None of this bi-romantic stuff, anyone can consider anything attractive from men to women to animals (ew).MelasZepheos said:
I'm bisexual, but even I'm skeptical when I hear someone come out of the closet as bi. Many people do it because it's "hot" and "cool", and they give a bad name to those who actually would like having a sexual relationship with either males or females, like me. I've had many friends and acquaintances who identify as bi if anyone ever asks, but outside of that, I've never seen or heard them go any farther than the occasional "He's/She's pretty hot". It appears girls feign this more, and out of all the "bisexual" girls I've met, only one of them has actually done things that confirm her to like other girls. It's too bad. Now all of us are labeled either as posers that want more attention, or cowards that don't want to be completely out of the closet. Also, there's a big difference between bisexuality and bicuriosity, people! A mild attraction to someone of the same sex does NOT mean you can go around calling yourself a bisexual!
Most people you see in real life aren't going to admit they are bi, gay and lesbians often can't hide it if they even wanted to because of how non-masculine or non-feminine they are in general life. Hell, the only gay people I know are "textbook", and that you can tell they are before you finish a conversation with them.
A "bi person" doesn't usually behave in this manor, they usually "act straight", and therefore aren't easy to spot.
So saying you don't know any in your real life, doesn't mean its accurate, there could be many and you just don't know about it, either because its something they keep hidden, or simply because you see them with the opposite sex.
A "bi person" doesn't usually behave in this manor, they usually "act straight", and therefore aren't easy to spot.
So saying you don't know any in your real life, doesn't mean its accurate, there could be many and you just don't know about it, either because its something they keep hidden, or simply because you see them with the opposite sex.
Answered in the first post. I don't have much to add since this is where I stand. I don't really see why it matters what someone's sexuality is on here. If they lie or tell the truth, it won't affect you in either way.Radeonx said:
The hell is up with all these sexuality threads? Can't we just get over the whole gay/bi/macroherpophile thing? Some people sleep with the opposite sex, some people sleep with the same sex, some do both, and some want to fuck Godzilla. In the end, is it really of great interest who fucks what in their spare time?
Whether they're bi or not is irrelevant, it's not like you can actually test or figure out if someone is lying about it on these forums, so basically everything comes down to assumptions and speculation.
Whether they're bi or not is irrelevant, it's not like you can actually test or figure out if someone is lying about it on these forums, so basically everything comes down to assumptions and speculation.
When regular porn gets boring and actual sex is too troublesome, nerds go to f'ed up porn then identify themselves with this porn. Hence furies and bisexual people on forums.
Huh. I spend a lot of time with gays, and only a few of them couldn't pass themselves off as straight in a conversation. You could tell with me after, say, a week or so of talking to me regularly, if I don't outright state it. You probably know many more gay people than you think, you just can't tell. And you probably know fewer bisexuals than you think, because four fifths of those who say they are are posing attention whores!Zenn3k said:
Well, yeah, that's pretty much all sexual attraction is based on. If you are willing to perform sex acts or have sex acts performed on you then you are a type of sexual, whichever it is.smallthemouse said:
If you are a man who prefers to have his sexual acts with a woman, but there are certain men with whom he wouldn't mind sharing any form of sexual activity, then he is bisexual, even if there is only one other man. To take the Kinsey scale, which grades from 0 to 6, 0 being fully hetero, 6 being fully homo, our hypothetical man is thus a 1. A fully homoseuxal man who is okay with sex acts with a select group of women would then be 5 on the scale. Even if you don't want to acknowledge it to yourself, and even if you haven't engaged your acts, you are bisexual, whether you like it or not.
Basically the more willing you are to have sex equally with people of either gender the closer to the middle of the scale you are, and it's that simple. You could probably further generalise and say that het men at '1' would be more drawn to feminine men, but that doesn't have quite as solid research behind it.
The problem with your question seems to be more about considering yourself to be bisexual, as opposed to actually being bisexual. If you have a sexual attraction to someone of the opposite gender, which includes being comfortable with sexual acts on either side, you are bisexual, it's just whether you acknowledge it. If you don't know but think you might be comfortable with it, then you are bi-curious.
And kissing, sensuous back massages, long romantic walks, hugging, basically doesn't count, because that falls under 'romantic'.
Also, the Kinsey scale doesn't account for any attraction besides male of female human. So no animals of transgender.
I would imagine that's because you get the anonymity of the internet and can say, feel what you want easier then you would in real life. Not as many consequences being who you are on the internet as there is off line. I'm straight by the way.smallthemouse said:
Yes but as i said before, it goes the opposite way too, people can pretend to be anything they're not eithergbemery said:
OK, I'm going to try to put the "make up your mind" argument to bed at least in this setting. I will probably fail, but I have to make the attempt.DatCracker said:
What if I told you that you had to choose whether to date blondes or brunettes, that it would become a significant part of your identity and if you ever changed your mind you'd be branded a liar? Or...theists or atheists? Tall people or short people? Thin people or fat people? People older than you or people younger than you? Some people have a strong preference for each of these, some do not. Some have no preference at all. There's a difference between being indecisive and just plain not caring which camp you happen to find beauty in. Of course there's the whole issue of binary-only gender classification but I'll save that rant for another time.
So I'm not going to make up my mind because I already have. I fall pretty much in the middle of the Kinsey scale. I've known that most of my life, and I was lucky enough to grow up in an accepting environment where no one gave me grief for it and I felt no pressure to fit in with the dominant orientation of my social group. I love PEOPLE. Frankly, it's always puzzled me that what sex and/or gender someone is could matter so much that you wouldn't even consider dating them if they were on the wrong side of the line. I know that's how lots of people feel, most people apparently. I still can't imagine what it's like.
I can't imagine not enjoying boobs. They are delightful in every way. So therefore I can't be straight. I can't imagine not enjoying the ahem...male body, let's say. It's fascinating and different from me, and I love that. So therefore I can't be gay. Shall I stop admitting to admiring the male or the female form so that no one gets confused?
Gives those who truly are Bisexual a bad name.
It's so bizzare that I find it easier to come out as a lesbian then bisexual. No matter the company it's just easier to let people think I'm gay then to give them even the thought that I'm bisexual (Or Pansexual... but that's another story) just because of the stigma surrounding them. I understansd why. Most people who say they're bisexual aren't. They're either curious, on the gravy train to gay or just plain lieing for attention.
It's almsot worse in some parts of the 'gay community'. They get even more up in arms about it sometimes.
It's so bizzare that I find it easier to come out as a lesbian then bisexual. No matter the company it's just easier to let people think I'm gay then to give them even the thought that I'm bisexual (Or Pansexual... but that's another story) just because of the stigma surrounding them. I understansd why. Most people who say they're bisexual aren't. They're either curious, on the gravy train to gay or just plain lieing for attention.
It's almsot worse in some parts of the 'gay community'. They get even more up in arms about it sometimes.
When I saw this post I laughed really hard. Thankyou good sir for getting my day off to a nice start.witness51 said:
OT: I consider myself straight, and if people say to me that they are bisexual then I am not going to question it. Why should I? If that is how you identify yourself then I have no right or inclination to rain on your parade.
You know, I always considered that argument trolling, because I didn't think anybody would be stupid enough to ACTUALLY think bisexuals just can't make up their mind! Recently being proven wrong, and discovering that I overestimated human intelligence, I can only say that your comment is the only one in this thread that I wholeheartedly agree with. Well, I don't like boobs, but that's beside the point. Thank you for stating things better than I could have.feycreature said: