I'm pretty sure this is the funniest forum, ever

[Asus Quickclaw]

I've been on that forum before. After a while you realize that they're all bloody serious, and it goes from funny to slightly frightening.

They are SERIOUS?!

 

[Darkmantle]

I think the stupidity of the statements is actually pretty funny.

So are you butthurt or do you just really not find it funny?

Don't find it funny.
Because I'm fairy certain they're serious and that makes me poutyface.

they're quoting other people

 

[The Funslinger]

I've been on that forum before. After a while you realize that they're all bloody serious, and it goes from funny to slightly frightening.

They are SERIOUS?!

The website is an archive of statements made in a serious context. The video itself is acting out some of the worst and most retarded.

Oh, the world we live in, eh?

All my christian friends who aren't terrible people would shudder at this.

 

[The Funslinger]

but sticking your dick into a vagina AINT SEX. mm-kay? its not. since when did ?sex? come to mean ?men sticking their dicks into women?? because thats what it means. thats the intended, and working, meaning of the word. someone fucked up here, people. we need to start over, because ?sex? has nothing to do with being sexual, with arousal, or desire, or with being interesting or creative or anything. and its definitely not about ?expressing? anything, except penis-worship, and mens entitlement to put girls and women in harms way, without reproach.

so if someone were to say to me, ?its just erotic massage!!!!1!!11!? or ?its just mutual masturbation/digital penetration!!!11!!? or ?its just authentic female desire? or ?its just a warm, wet, aroused vulva with a non-phallic-looking vibrator stimulating it to orgasm!!!!1!!1? i would say ?yay sex, bring it on.? but thats not what anyone means, when they say ?its just sex.?

?sex? as its intended to mean, means ?penis in vagina? and since that puts girls and women at risk for pregnancy and STDs, the payoff is not worth the risk. even if our clits were located in our vaginas, IT STILL WOULDNT BE WORTH IT. but they arent, and its not. ?its just sex? means ?its just misogyny and male entitlement.? and if you dont have a problem with that, you have a very serious problem, indeed.

Can someone explain this to me please, because I don't even know what fucking point the author of this gem is trying to make.

I don't know what it's talking about, but it sounds like it might be an excerpt of one of the better written parts of 50 Shades.

Edit: Fixed mistake.

 

[CaptainMarvelous]

but sticking your dick into a vagina AINT SEX. mm-kay? its not. since when did ?sex? come to mean ?men sticking their dicks into women?? because thats what it means. thats the intended, and working, meaning of the word. someone fucked up here, people. we need to start over, because ?sex? has nothing to do with being sexual, with arousal, or desire, or with being interesting or creative or anything. and its definitely not about ?expressing? anything, except penis-worship, and mens entitlement to put girls and women in harms way, without reproach.

so if someone were to say to me, ?its just erotic massage!!!!1!!11!? or ?its just mutual masturbation/digital penetration!!!11!!? or ?its just authentic female desire? or ?its just a warm, wet, aroused vulva with a non-phallic-looking vibrator stimulating it to orgasm!!!!1!!1? i would say ?yay sex, bring it on.? but thats not what anyone means, when they say ?its just sex.?

?sex? as its intended to mean, means ?penis in vagina? and since that puts girls and women at risk for pregnancy and STDs, the payoff is not worth the risk. even if our clits were located in our vaginas, IT STILL WOULDNT BE WORTH IT. but they arent, and its not. ?its just sex? means ?its just misogyny and male entitlement.? and if you dont have a problem with that, you have a very serious problem, indeed.

Can someone explain this to me please, because I don't even know what fucking point the author of this gem is trying to make.

I don't know but there are a couple of dictionaries and the gay community who would like to have a word with them.

 

[Pinkamena]

I've been on that forum before. After a while you realize that they're all bloody serious, and it goes from funny to slightly frightening.

They are SERIOUS?!

Don't underestimate the idiocy of crazy fundamentalists.

 

[Baron von Blitztank]

Well I do my best to keep this place as fun as possible but thanks for... oh.
That's not funny at all. Most of this is just Grammar Abuse of the highest manner. I'm sad now... we could of had hot dogs.

 

[Guffe]

I was waiting for Escapist-praise, and I get this?!
Not cool man, not cool!

 

[Sean Hollyman]

Hmmm... I dislike this thread, let us all disagree with him and glorify The Escapist instead...

So yeah the Escapist is pretty cool huh?

Indeed, we are the coolest cats in town.

 

[Spambot 3000]

The Westboro Baptist Church Forums are like that and they are damn funny. The founder of the site made a thread about how Gmod is the work of the devil. It wasn't a joke either. I pissed myself laughing.

 

[Overusedname]

Yeah, same as above. I thought you were commenting on the Escapist. "Yeah, this place is pretty funny." I looked that up, and uh, I don't know, funniest people ever? Nah. On the Internet? I'd say either the Escapist or the GiantBomb community has the most entertaining and well-rounded users, if given the right thread or topic to stretch out in.

^This has been my experience.

As for the vid, it get's a little old to me pretty quickly.

The joke runs thin, ya know? To the point it's just purely vindictive, not funny anymore.

 

[DaWaffledude]

"If it weren't for the fear of God's judgement, I would have killed many many times".

Okay, I'm scared.

 

[MelasZepheos_v1legacy]

So yeah the Escapist is pretty cool huh?

Well, not anymore now that we've labeled it as such.

...Dammit!

We just lost the game!

Oh fuck you.

Anyhow...

I'm fairly certain it's satire. Yes some of these quotes will be true, and some of them will be true but exeggerated, but I think overall these are just too perfect to be what fundamentalists really think.

Generally people who are that genuinely crazy (I'm insulting all fundamentalists here, including non-religious fundies) aren't quite this coherent. And they certainly don't make statements that are that perfectly phrased so as to be practically a set-up and punchline.

 

[Magikarp]

So yeah the Escapist is pretty cool huh?

Well, not anymore now that we've labeled it as such.

...Dammit!

Don't worry, we just have to pretend we don't care if it's cool or not, then it'll be cool again!

 

[repeating integers]

FSTDT is not a "forum" - it's an archive site, for quoting hilarious/depressing statements made by fundamentalists, racists and conspiracy theorists. I frequent it.

Listening to the first 20s, I think this is just blatant satire.

EDIT Yes, this satire. The acid bit confirmed this in my mind.

Not all of it. Of the Top 100, most are proven real and 100% non-satire - perhaps most scarily, this one [http://www.fstdt.net/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=67487].

That is... honestly horrifying. The fact that anyone could think that way blows my mind. Someone in the development of that man's life failed miserably.

Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to horrify you even more by letting you know that this man continues to run a school by those principles [http://www.fstdt.com/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=67762].

 

[Zantos]

The biggest lie is "Scientists use complex terminology in order for make it difficult for true Christians to refute their claims."

Bullshit, scientists use complex terminology to piss off other scientists. Especially those damn chemists.

The Atheist society bit is absolutely hilarious. "Don't go in the bedroom, there's two gay guys fucking in there!"