Maybe you should meet him in the middle, talk about it, and try to loosen up about some issues, and get him to be a little more serious in some issues, remember these are the best years of your life, so go out and do something to remember them by ya know.Rachel317 said:Hi
I search bar-ed this, and didn't find anything exactly like this so, if there ARE topics of the same, I apologise in advance!
Basically, what constitutes as immaturity to you? Would you date someone who was immature? If so, how long would you put up with them before you got shot of 'em?
I ask because I'm dating a guy who is pretty immature. He might be normal for his age (he's almost 21), but I'm only 19 and live away from home (studying for a degree), which has forced me to grow up a bit so...maybe my expectations of him are too high, because I'M mature for my age? I don't want that to make me sound like a douche bag!!
I know there are some well-rounded people on here, so I'd really appreciate anyone's advice! Or you can share similar stories and how you resolved them.
Immaturity in a guy/girl
- Thread starter Rachel317
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Well my ex-girlfriend was immature who liked to pretend she was mature. Though it became obvious when she started acting like a little kid and a *****. She recently broke contact with her best friend because she was being friendly to me.
Well maturity comes in many different forms. I'm 21 now, and in a lot of ways I think I peaked in maturity at about 15-16 and have slid downhill ever since (I was quite serious at school, but sixth form and university have mellowed me out, like a lot.)
On the other hand, my emotional maturity and ability to deal with issues is obviously better now than it was back then. I'm a much more rounded person now, even if I like an imature giggle now and then (okay, all the time lol).
On the other hand, my emotional maturity and ability to deal with issues is obviously better now than it was back then. I'm a much more rounded person now, even if I like an imature giggle now and then (okay, all the time lol).
Being homophobic myself, when one talks of the size of their penis, I give them one of 2 reactions:
Guy: seriously, thats gross, STFU.
Girl: wait, YOU HAS PENIS?
*snicker* sorry, couldn't resist. on topic; I'm rather disgusted by immature girls and guys. I'm not quite sure why, maybe because though I like the occasional immature joke from time to time I like people around my age (15 BTW) that can take themselves seriously when neccessary. that and bragging about how elongular your penis is or how sexy you are is either arrogant and vulgar (if your a guy) or a TOTAL turn off (if your a girl).
Guy: seriously, thats gross, STFU.
Girl: wait, YOU HAS PENIS?
*snicker* sorry, couldn't resist. on topic; I'm rather disgusted by immature girls and guys. I'm not quite sure why, maybe because though I like the occasional immature joke from time to time I like people around my age (15 BTW) that can take themselves seriously when neccessary. that and bragging about how elongular your penis is or how sexy you are is either arrogant and vulgar (if your a guy) or a TOTAL turn off (if your a girl).
I usually don't care about someone's immaturity or maturity, being that I seem to fluctuate between overly immature and overly mature. It would be pretty douchey of me to chide someone for a personality flaw that I suffer from as well.
I would love to be just like everyone else, but, alas, that's the way it goes.
I would love to be just like everyone else, but, alas, that's the way it goes.
All I wanna say on this thread is that I always knew I was immature but never knew to what extent until I was at work (I'm a manager at Gamestop) and some guy traded in a Wii so I told my part-timer, "Hey, I'm gonna go get a box for my Wii" and upon realizing what I had said, I started to laugh.
I find that the high-school/middle-school (usually between age 13 and 18) are immature, because they try too hard. I also find people who wear baseball caps backwards/at an odd angle and who wear basketball/football jerseys every day to be immature, regardless of age.
As much as I enjoy your magnifying glass, I have to disagree with you here. I admit, am under 20 and I still live at home and yet I believe that I can function quite well with out the parentals. I cook my own food, clean up my own awesome treasure junk, and make sure I balance work and play. Admittedly these are still to the standards of a youngin, but I think they're pretty peachy-keen. On the other side of this, though, my parents are never home. So, I suppose I sort of live blah, blah, blah. Try not to stereotype things, it ruins that amazing magnifying glass.Rachel317 said:
Dunno, it depends on what constitutes 'immaturity'.
I still think saying poop and penis is funny, buahaha. And farting is great. So's the "that's what she said!" and "your face!!" lines. For me those can never get old
But I don't do and say those things in front of everyone. In my house I will because it's my house, and I feel comfortable letting a couple of farts out and laughing about it. My housemate finds it equally funny, so it's great like that. But if she didn't then hey, I'd be discreet, because it's her house too and she has to be comfortable as well.
On the other hand I'm a person who would probably be considered mature in other ways - I have a degree, a mortgage, personal loan, my own car, a solid job close to my house and a long-term investment plan. I have done public presentations and attended conferences. I have had counselling and started to become a better person, becoming more comfortable with myself.
So if those things make me mature, then awesome!
Applying that logic to a potential girl/boyfriend then ya know, I'd love to date someone who had a wicked sense of humour. Who'd laugh at "your face!!" and come back with a "YO MUMMA", haha. But at the same time be mature in other ways. Ya know, again, holding a steady job because I don't want someone to be dependent on me. And be secure in themselves. I wanna be able to hang with my friends and not have them all stressed out and thinking I'm having an affair or prefer someone else's company to theirs.
Really, I think maturity outweighs immaturity and if they're a little immature then that's great, but they have to be a lot mature.
P.S. Playing pokemon and loving Twilight are two things I personally view as very immature and I wouldn't be keen on having them in my life. Especially Twilight.
I still think saying poop and penis is funny, buahaha. And farting is great. So's the "that's what she said!" and "your face!!" lines. For me those can never get old
But I don't do and say those things in front of everyone. In my house I will because it's my house, and I feel comfortable letting a couple of farts out and laughing about it. My housemate finds it equally funny, so it's great like that. But if she didn't then hey, I'd be discreet, because it's her house too and she has to be comfortable as well.
On the other hand I'm a person who would probably be considered mature in other ways - I have a degree, a mortgage, personal loan, my own car, a solid job close to my house and a long-term investment plan. I have done public presentations and attended conferences. I have had counselling and started to become a better person, becoming more comfortable with myself.
So if those things make me mature, then awesome!
Applying that logic to a potential girl/boyfriend then ya know, I'd love to date someone who had a wicked sense of humour. Who'd laugh at "your face!!" and come back with a "YO MUMMA", haha. But at the same time be mature in other ways. Ya know, again, holding a steady job because I don't want someone to be dependent on me. And be secure in themselves. I wanna be able to hang with my friends and not have them all stressed out and thinking I'm having an affair or prefer someone else's company to theirs.
Really, I think maturity outweighs immaturity and if they're a little immature then that's great, but they have to be a lot mature.
P.S. Playing pokemon and loving Twilight are two things I personally view as very immature and I wouldn't be keen on having them in my life. Especially Twilight.
Immaturity is the inability to act politely to someone you hate in a public setting. I hate certain people, but I don't call then assholes in public. My personal beef is exactly that, personal. I will at least treat those who piss me off, with decency when surrounded by other people. No one wants to hear about my problems, or yours.
I'm pretty sure someone's already said this, I've been raised to believe that responsibility makes the man. Paying off debts, working with a purpose, and excepting harder aspects of life are all part of being mature.
I could see myself (briefly) dating a girl who is immature/irresponsible. I'm 19, that doesn't mean I'm always responsible, but I do what I can to make thing better for those around me.
I could see myself (briefly) dating a girl who is immature/irresponsible. I'm 19, that doesn't mean I'm always responsible, but I do what I can to make thing better for those around me.
Hey, I'm not saying that ANYONE who lives at home is immature, I'm just saying that if you ARE immature, then living independently can make you grow up a bit.Deathkingo said:
I was mature before I moved out as well, but different strokes for different folks, I guess.
Thanks for pointing that out though, means I got the opportunity to clarify! ^_^
4 years we have been together, we were great friends beforehand too...speaking of immaturity you should hear him on xbox with his mates right now -_- He knows enough is enough when I started yelling to him to shut up.Rachel317 said:
But if you know that he's done this to previous relationships and it concerns you, then he's probably not worth being with...unless of course he has changed his ways. You've only been together a month though, you'll know if he cares about your feelings soon enough. It doesn't seem to be a case of immaturity so much as it is a case of ignorance on his part.
People who have to brag about how big they are are generally small and trying to cover it up.Rachel317 said:Yeah, people who are TOO serious/mature are real life Buzz Killingtons. But there's gotta be a cut off point, right? There's a time and a place for immature/fun behaviour. Then again, where's the line between fun and immaturity?
Catkid, talking about penis sizes in...a social setting? Nice avatar, by the way
On topic, I would say that immaturity stems from an inability to have deep, intellectual conversations from time to time. I personally would not date someone with whom i could not make a deep connection. However, I do not feel that people who can let loose and have a good time are immature (I am certainly very capable of that).
Yea that sucks my friend.SimuLord said:
OP: I know it's been said before but I'm with the responsibility group. If you are able to be responsible, most of the time we are all still learning, then you are mature. If you aren't a very responsible person then well, pretty immature. I know I have learned that lesson the hard way. I am however better off for it. Maturing is sometimes a lengthy process. If this boy is worth it to you perhaps try to point out, kindly, where you think he could step it up. His reaction will also be a good indicator of whether or not he's worth staying with.