Is it that hard to find a virgin?

[estoria-etnia]

I never drank, did drugs, or had sex in high school. None of my friends (with the exception of those who turned 18 and were legal) did so either. It's really not that hard to find people like that. I don't see the appeal in doing drugs since it just kills your brain and has a whole lot of other nasty consequences and drinking to be really, really drunk always just confuses me ? again, I don't see the appeal in it. I've had a couple drinks now, but that's just one drink with dinner if I'm out with a friend or an occasional glass of wine with dinner (and it's perfectly legal where I live).

I won't date a smoker either, but that's because I would rather not kiss an ash tray. I have nothing against people who smoke, but I wouldn't date one.

Ahem, as for sex... nope, haven't had it and not particularly interested in it.

 

[estoria-etnia]

I never drank, did drugs, or had sex in high school. None of my friends (with the exception of those who turned 18 and were legal) did so either. It's really not that hard to find people like that. I don't see the appeal in doing drugs since it just kills your brain and has a whole lot of other nasty consequences and drinking to be really, really drunk always just confuses me ? again, I don't see the appeal in it. I've had a couple drinks now, but that's just one drink with dinner if I'm out with a friend or an occasional glass of wine with dinner (and it's perfectly legal where I live).

I won't date a smoker either, but that's because I would rather not kiss an ash tray. I have nothing against people who smoke, but I wouldn't date one.

Ahem, as for sex... nope, haven't had it and not particularly interested in it.

 

[JPArbiter]

Your probably sick of this already but did you just peddle that "abstinence 1st" bullshit and claim to be the voice of reason?

Google "incredulous"- you'll find a picture of my face, I mean honestly.

Abstinence, if followed strictly, is 100% full proof. note I said if followed strictly.

yes condoms and Birth Control are not 100% full proof, but you know what, the chance of failure is also statistically insignificant. to the point of if a condom breaks or birth control fails it can be prescribed to operator Error more then the implement itself. (things like not using a lubricant with a condom, or forgetting to take your pill one day.)

 

[aidutcher]

I could show statistics where it is proven swingers have longer lasting and more stable marriages but that is irrelevant.

I'm genuinely interested in these statistics. I'm studying psychology so I can be a marriage counselor some day, so anything pertaining to longer-lasting and more stable marriages is interesting to me.

 

[Mr.Pandah]

I found one, and now she is no longer one. She's also my girlfriend and I love her to death.

 

[JPArbiter]

I could show statistics where it is proven swingers have longer lasting and more stable marriages but that is irrelevant.

I'm genuinely interested in these statistics. I'm studying psychology so I can be a marriage counselor some day, so anything pertaining to longer-lasting and more stable marriages is interesting to me.

I read it in either the National Institute of Health or the New England Medical Journal... I honestly can not recall right now and do not have either stack of books handy at this time.

word of advice, avoid resources provided by the national organization for marriage or the family planning institute, as both are christian organizations and have been blasted for an unscientific approach. and if you want to be a marriage counselor make sure you get married yourself, and spend time studying the institution from a sociological and psychological standpoint, rather then an emotional and religious one.

 

[HalfTangible]

Never smoked, drank, or had sex. Never will smoke or have sex. Might drink but I dunno if i want to =/

 

[shadyh8er]

So basically, what I am as is, are there people who didn't illegally drink, smoke or who hadn't had sex during their high school years?

*Raises hand*

*Joins in had-raising.*

I had my mind on other things, like how to get my best friend's suicidal girlfriend to stop calling me. (She has, and I assume she's still alive).

 

[RastaBadger]

I'm 17 and living in the UK. Haven't had sex (or even kissed a girl for that matter :C ), haven't smoked or done drugs and have never had more than a sip or two of alcohol.
Don't ever see myself doing drugs or smoking, alcohol maybe if my social situation and tastebuds change dramatically and as for the whole girls thing... well we can all hope.

 

[esperandote]

You need to find someone with an specific character, shy, quiet, responsible, home and family type of girl (Thugh hard to find if you add atractive to the list).

My GF and I are both virgins (She because she's like that and me because though i would like to have sex if i could, I'm not dying to do it and i want to help her to acomplish her dream of remaining virgin until marriage). We are both 27 years old and we've been togheter for 5 years and 8 months.

So I have this thing about dating where I won't date anyone who has had sex with another man or who smokes and/or does drugs. Call me old school or call me weird, but it is just part of my moral system. And today, during my sociology class, we got on the topic of sex and dating. I told the class my stand on such and they all chuckled. When I ask what was funny, someone told me that the chance of finding a girl like that now-a-days is almost impossible and that I should just give up on it. And it hit me, every person in my class, which ranged from 9th grade to 12th grade, that everyone had drank beer illegally, smoked pot and chewed, or has had sex multiple times... except me. I could not believe it and even my teacher was not shocked in the least to hear that. He was actually agreeing with it. So basically, what I am as is, are there people who didn't illegally drink, smoke or who hadn't had sex during their high school years?

Edit: Since some one asked, I am from the west coast of the U.S. in Washington.

Edit II: As Azure-Supernova stated:

You're not after a virgin you're after someone responsible and faithful. You could meet a virgin and full well have glorious sex, only for her to turn around and cheat or not be a virgin at all. Surely virginity would fall behind the two afforementioned traits?

I suppose he's definition is a little more what I am looking for. I guess I could drop the virginity issue down a little if I could find faithful and responsible girl. I am still standing strong on not doing illegal drugs and drinking but I could give more leeway on virginity.

You need to find someone with an specific character, shy, quiet, responsible, home and family type of girl (Thugh hard to find if you add atractive to the list).

My GF and I are both virgins (She because she's like that and me because though i would like to have sex if i could, I'm not dying to do it and i want to help her to acomplish her dream of remaining virgin until marriage). We are both 27 years old and we've been togheter for 5 years and 8 months. We don't smoke or do drugs and she doesn't drink either but I do. We mean to marry next year.

 

[Forgetitnow344]

To everyone that has commented to my previous post:
I hope that nobody was offended or upset by what I said earlier, I was only talking about my own experience from when I was 17 years old (18 years ago) in a way of relating to Death God's post, and how outwardly harsh I was toward the people who laughed at me (mind you that came from over 10 years of constant teasing/bullying that I'd experienced at the very hands of the people sitting in the room at the time too). My standards never really slipped, and I'll admit that I had girlfriends in my time that I wanted to have sex with, but refrained because of how much I wanted to respect the very women I was with.

Mind you, because of that I've had more girlfriends leave me thinking that I didn't want them. Even so, my main thought was to not have someone consider me a "baby's father" rather than a "husband". I have heard the former term so many times that it's made me sick, and all too often it's from people I wouldn't give the time of day to. My thought is, if you're willing to have sex, then you should take on the responsibility of helping to raise that child, and consider the person who bore it into this world as someone to spend the rest of your life with. If not, then you shouldn't be doing anything to create a child.

End of statement.

I have a lot of reasons for what I've said, and all of it stems from personal experience, or having to deal with people who consider their children as a bargaining chip, and not as a person that relies upon them. To me, sex equals children simply because it's too easy to make one, and condoms/birth control pills/etc aren't 100% fool proof, only abstinence is, yet nobody ever feels the need to abstain from sex just because it's not popular... and that is a real crime. Not only to the woman who gives birth, but also to the child brought into the world. Feel free to talk harshly about my past, my future, or me in general, but at least I have every confidence about being a voice of reason here, regardless of my career path, my personal preferences for art styles, or my desire to actually help people.

I was with you until you decided to say more things after the end of your statement. The probability of having a child when using properly birth control is /staggering/. The human mind is incapable of simply conceiving probability, and will always focus on the negative consequence as being the inevitable outcome. If it was 99% likely that you WOULD have a child if you used birth control, you would clearly never have sex because the 1% effectiveness is certainly not enough, but you are just as apprehensive because of that realistic 1% failure rate (which also factors in misuse of condoms and missed birth control pills) simply because it is a possibility. It is SO unlikely. Then your statement about abstaining from sex because it is unpopular is just ridiculous. I know it happens sometimes, but I don't know a SINGLE person who lost their virginity due to peer pressure. I even turned down activity when I was 13 because I wasn't ready, and I never regretted it. I regret turning some down when I was 15, but I certainly don't regret finally losing it when I was 17 because I was ready.

Because vaginas are awesome, and being incredibly close to someone you care about is sublime.

 

[bulbasaur765]

A lack of virginity isn't something you should judge people on. I have a friend who lost her virginity at age 15 and she has been my best friend to this day. Hell, she has even been my "Moral Compass" at certain points in my life. If I judged her based on her experience, then I would probably be regretting it right now.

(I'm also still a virgin btw)

 

[Strife17O7]

*user-omitted*

 

[Odbarc]

So I have this thing about dating where I won't date anyone who has had sex with another man or who smokes and/or does drugs. Call me old school or call me weird, but it is just part of my moral system. And today, during my sociology class, we got on the topic of sex and dating. I told the class my stand on such and they all chuckled. When I ask what was funny, someone told me that the chance of finding a girl like that now-a-days is almost impossible and that I should just give up on it. And it hit me, every person in my class, which ranged from 9th grade to 12th grade, that everyone had drank beer illegally, smoked pot and chewed, or has had sex multiple times... except me. I could not believe it and even my teacher was not shocked in the least to hear that. He was actually agreeing with it. So basically, what I am as is, are there people who didn't illegally drink, smoke or who hadn't had sex during their high school years?

Edit: Since some one asked, I am from the west coast of the U.S. in Washington.

Edit II: As Azure-Supernova stated:

You're not after a virgin you're after someone responsible and faithful. You could meet a virgin and full well have glorious sex, only for her to turn around and cheat or not be a virgin at all. Surely virginity would fall behind the two afforementioned traits?

I suppose he's definition is a little more what I am looking for. I guess I could drop the virginity issue down a little if I could find faithful and responsible girl. I am still standing strong on not doing illegal drugs and drinking but I could give more leeway on virginity.

I was raised right too. But truly, 99% of the population (not THAT 99%) are completely scum immoral and have been completely tainted with sin.
Everyone in my family uses drugs, drinks and whatnot.

It's very easy to find an UGLY woman no one wants if all you want is her virginity.

 

[gallaetha_matt]

If you want a virgin so bad, you'd better make sure that your parents can afford a damn good dowry. Offering a few goats and a lamb can only get you so far. You need some gold, spices and cold hard cash if you want your new bride's hymen to be intact.

On a less facetious note, people that abstain from drugs, alcohol and sex aren't that rare. Not really. You can probably find one if that's what you're into, especially in America (don't even need to look to see that's where you're posting from). But they aren't in the majority and they never were. It's just people were much better at hiding their hash pipes and malaysian hookers in the past.

Don't take it so personally, OP. Drugs and sex don't make you bad or immoral. Romantically losing your virginity at the same as your partner is a fine idea, but it's not likely to happen outside of a Hollywood movie. It's not something that you should make a priority. Even if you do luck out and manage it in the real world, you're still not likely to have a long term relationship with the first person you sleep with. Not in the way that you want to anyway. Virtually nobody ends up with the first person they're with, I'd argue that you totally need to experiment with different partners first before you decide to settle down. It'd be a real shame to save yourself for your wedding night only to discover that you're not sexually compatible with your new wife.

 

[CODE-D]

I don't see what the big deal with virginity is. Frankly, I'd prefer it if at least one of us knew what they were doing.

Knew what she was doing like a prostitute? Im sorry I just hate always hearing that answer, especially when it comes from elmo.

 

[AdmiralMemo]

I'm 29. I'm still a virgin by choice. I never drank, smoked, or did drugs.
I am quite sure that I will find a girl who has done the same. However, I'm not TOO picky about the drinking. Smoking is a major problem, though, as I absolutely can't stand it, almost to the point of allergy.

 

[Strife17O7]

I don't see what the big deal with virginity is. Frankly, I'd prefer it if at least one of us knew what they were doing.

Knew what she was doing like a prostitute? Thats reassuring.

And I agree with the former position and believe you can shove your base prostitution assumptions up your @ss along with your vaunted Virginity and the pedestal you built with it to stand on and pretend to be above people.