I've Had Enough!

[eatenbyagrue]

And then there's the cultural attitude: in most parts of Asia--

When I read your original post I immediately thought that your family must be Asian. And sure enough, that's what your profile says.

Southeast Asia, to be specific. It's not part of the Asia most people think of (or as a friend of mine would say, we're not the "cool" Asians), but there's enough Chinese, Japanese, Arabic and Indian influence on the culture here to make the country an offshoot state (although the most prevalent cultural influence is Chinese),

 

[headshotcatcher]

I kinda am in the same situation as you, except that my parents don't bully me but instead won't let me do anything while they always commend me for being 'so mature and responsible'

I'm working on the people walking over me though, just try to act a little more assertive. Thats all help I can offer you I guess..

 

[Antlers]

OK, I get that culturally asians don't move out at 21 but... Can you seriously not get ANY job? When do you finish your degree? And do you not move out for college anyway?

Whenever you finish your degree you should move out of Asia altogether. You have perfect English. You'd get a job. Maybe a shit one, but a job nonetheless. Unless, secretly deep down you don't want to move out...

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Aside from a bloody murder, I think moving out is your best bet.

 

[Uncompetative]

Good on you for making a first step, let us hope it is one of many. Please do not take offense but you're parents appear to be no more than incompetent in raising children, was your Father a drill Sergant at some point in his 'illustrious' career?
It's true there are two sides to every story, however from your description his actions in parenthood are some of the most impractical and backwards of them all.

Dad used to manage a restaurant, then retired from that and started a catering business.

I'm guessing the resentment comes from the fact that he wanted an athlete for a son, and instead I went and became one of those shy bookworms. I spent many a day of my childhood sitting under a tree reading something, only for dad to take it away and force me to play basketball with the neighborhood kids, despite the fact that as a kid, I was large, slow and awkward as hell.

Solution: get a Jam Jar. Slowly fill it with your own cold wank. Empty it over your father's head. Say:

"Now you can't accuse me of lacking in spunk!"

 

[JenXXXJen]

Well done I say, if you're not an outspoken person by nature, then 'growing a spine' is pretty difficult.

*Applause*

 

[eatenbyagrue]

OK, I get that culturally asians don't move out at 21 but... Can you seriously not get ANY job? When do you finish your degree? And do you not move out for college anyway?

Whenever you finish your degree you should move out of Asia altogether. You have perfect English. You'd get a job. Maybe a shit one, but a job nonetheless. Unless, secretly deep down you don't want to move out...

I can, but it won't be one that can support a person.

To put things into perspective: people with college degrees here will sometimes have to settle for busing tables. To get even a menial job becomes next to impossible without any kind of degree.

I come from an old money family with a big business to support them, but its a big family and going to work in the "family business" wouldn't improve matters one bit.

I speak excellent English and could get a job doing tech support, but I tried it, and honestly, the pay is bad. Remember this next time you call tech support: the guy on the other end of the line with an indecipherable accent? Most likely, he's doing it for less than $300 a month. He's most likely a college student doing this to make ends meet, or trying to get some extra money so they can have a little nest egg when they finish school. He's working late into the night until the wee hours of the morning, knowing he has classes in the morning, worried about tests and making it to school on time, and projects he has to turn in and books he has to read.

It's sad, yes, but thats what people in the third world will put up with for a little money.

And I plan to leave. I know its not considered cool to like the Americans, but honestly, after living with the kind of crap being a Filipino gives me, I'd rather be an American, or pretty much anything that isn't here in the East.

 

[Conveant0]

Good on you for making a first step, let us hope it is one of many. Please do not take offense but you're parents appear to be no more than incompetent in raising children, was your Father a drill Sergant at some point in his 'illustrious' career?
It's true there are two sides to every story, however from your description his actions in parenthood are some of the most impractical and backwards of them all.

Dad used to manage a restaurant, then retired from that and started a catering business.

I'm guessing the resentment comes from the fact that he wanted an athlete for a son, and instead I went and became one of those shy bookworms. I spent many a day of my childhood sitting under a tree reading something, only for dad to take it away and force me to play basketball with the neighborhood kids, despite the fact that as a kid, I was large, slow and awkward as hell.

Solution: get a Jam Jar. Slowly fill it with your own cold wank. Empty it over your father's head. Say:

"Now you can't accuse me of lacking in spunk!"

If I ever have kids, I will now learn to fear them and their cold, devious minds....

 

[wewontdie11]

Wow that sucks man, but good on ya. My dad is a dick too but I stopped giving a shit what he thought long ago because academically I had more to be proud of when I passed secondary school.

Take no shit man. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxX3JkGHmDI&feature=related]

 

[Archer147]

tell them you're gay, that'll show 'em.

especially if you're straight no offense to all the homosexuals out there, i have the utmost respect for you. just that your family, eatenbyagrue, sounds like a very conservative sort of family.

just the type i hate

 

[Xyphon]

I have a question. Is your family rich? If so, that would explain why they act the way they do.

It's an old money family, but my dad has long since used up all his inheritance.

I actually feel a degree of sympathy towards you for being cursed with disgusting, miserable, slime-veined brats you charitably call "parents."

You've now started to stand your ground and fight; now is your time to escape from their shadow and be your own person, or else you'll spend the rest of your lives under their boots.

Your "parents" have had their chance to make something of their lives; never let them break yours.

The thing is, they're still my parents, and in a twisted, pathetic way, I still care about them.

I'd probably bring up the whole "cultural attitudes" here. In pretty much any Eastern culture, there's a high value placed on loyalty to your families, but it only goes one way: kids are expected to live up and to respect their parents, but parents can treat their kids like dirt, and it won't make them worse people in society's eyes.

That may explain it. I've seen MANY families who are, and even were, rich act like yours. They want you to be like them because they don't want their child doing something that they think wouldn't benefit the family in any way, shape or form. They want to control you so they can pretty much own your own money as theirs. They don't even care if you lose a leg on the job, as long as the money is coming in.

 

[TheScarecrow]

Come to Ireland man!

 

[DigitalSushi]

(99.3% on the exam, with a 122 IQ recorded by same

You should be good at Math's then.

Anyway, I'm glad you got that off your chest, I've read your story and I wish you the best. Hopefully knowing that the escapists here having read your woes will help you out.

What I say is, it sounds like you prove people wrong, carry on doing what you do, and prove them wrong some more.

As for your dad putting the PC in the living room, did you pay for it?, if so, its yours and he has no business touching your stuff, if he paid for it.... ermmm well its his to do as he pleases.

Maybe he's not tech savvy and wants you to teach him? but he's the aggressive type because he's running on automatic and the tribal instincts kick in when he's angry "ITS MINE AND I'M THE LEADER, DO AS I SAY".

obviously i'm using text book psychology and basic inferiority complex from what I've read, I'm not privvy to your fathers entire life to judge, or your life, but you are the typical sociologue in that you take that crap in this day and age (with its heirachy and structure), at least your not rebeling because you think you deserve better without trying.

 

[Latinidiot]

I don't know what to say man. I guess I'm lucky. Good luck with whatever happens now, and may your spine grow thick and sturdy like a pillar

 

[eatenbyagrue]

(99.3% on the exam, with a 122 IQ recorded by same

You should be good at Math's then.

Admittedly, Math was my weakest part of the test (88.3%, compared to Science at 99.9% and English at 93.5%), and I pretty much said "Fuck it" and guessed most of the answers.

 

[DigitalSushi]

(99.3% on the exam, with a 122 IQ recorded by same

You should be good at Math's then.

Admittedly, Math was my weakest part of the test (88.3%, compared to Science at 99.9% and English at 93.5%), and I pretty much said "Fuck it" and guessed most of the answers.

what about what else I said?

Well your IQ is 122 then your on the cusp of the logic/common sense barrier, which is good. But a good foundation in maths is good, and having over 75 % in maths is pretty good, so you should be proud of yourself.