Lamest Joke You've Ever Heard?

[ThePS1Fan]

So I think everyone knows at least one person who always tells the stupidest jokes as though they are the next great thing in comedy, or if not there is no short supply of these people on the Internet. So I want to know, what is the lamest joke anyone has ever told you?

 

[Averant]

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!"

....the fuck?

No, seriously, how did this joke come about? I want to know.

 

[Jazoni89]

How do you get Pikachu on a bus... Pokemon!

Yeah, such a cringe worthy joke.

Also, why did the bank robber saw the legs off his bed? Because he wanted to lay low for a while.

I really don't find that joke funny, but my Grandad always goes in to fits of laughter with that one.

However, I find that lame jokes are a dime a dozen on the back of those Penguin packets (chocolate biscuits in the UK), or those cheap christmas crackers you get at Poundland. I can't recall any, but they are all extremely lame.

 

[Ultress]

Any joke Blister makes in this video http://blip.tv/slowbeef/metroid-prime-episode-xviia-attempt-1-at-phazon-mines-3627361

 

[Jedoro]

Rene Descartes walks into a bar. When he gets to the bartender, the man turns to him and asks, "Would you like a drink?" Descartes replies with, "I think not," and disappears.

 

[Ectoplasmicz]

My friend told this to me, it's terrible, but we both pissed ourselves. Literally.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Police.

Police who?

Policeman.

Yup.

 

[Chatato]

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!"

I never got this joke until recently but I'm still not sure if I'm thinking what the creator of the joke was thinking.
But aside from that.
"Why did the plane crash?"
Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

 

[ThePS1Fan]

"Why did the plane crash?"
Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

I feel so bad for laughing at that.

 

[Averant]

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!"

I never got this joke until recently but I'm still not sure if I'm thinking what the creator of the joke was thinking.
But aside from that.
"Why did the plane crash?"
Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Do tell what he was thinking. I have no clue.

Favorite of my old boyscout troop:

"Why did the little girl fall of the swing?"
She had no arms.


Yeah, the lot of them are going to hell and loving every minute of it... XD

 

[Chatato]

Do tell what he was thinking. I have no clue.

I might just be over thinking it but I think he meant that the chicken died and it wasn't other side of the road it was you know "The Other Side"

 

[crudus]

If you are what you eat, then I am a vegetarian!

-snip-

Were you the one that posted that the last time this thread cropped up?

 

[Dr.Susse]

Authorities worked for five hours today to free a Dutch man from a rain pipe.
A plumber was called in to confirm that the drain was indeed clogged.


My favourite part about going commando is the de-briefing.

 

[The Night Angel]

Why was six afraid of seven??? because seven ate nine.... *kills himself*

 

[TIMESWORDSMAN]

Spoiler: Terrible

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the forest.

Suddenly, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "Do you have any problems with shit sticking to your fur?"

The rabbit, somewhat confused, says "No, why do you ask?"

And the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.

I think that's an old Eddie Murphy joke, from back in his orange jumpsuit days. Usually he was funny, but that was just awful.

 

[Rawne1980]

2 fish swimming along and they come across a brick wall...

First fish says "dam".

Why does Edward Woodward have so many D's in his name?

Because if he didn't he would be called Ewar Woowar (I hate you Joe Pasquale, I hate you for making me laugh at that one).

 

[Revnak_v1legacy]

Rene Descartes walks into a bar. When he gets to the bartender, the man turns to him and asks, "Would you like a drink?" Descartes replies with, "I think not," and disappears.

For some strange reason I really like this joke.

OT: your face