Let's Play: Knights of the Old Republic COMPLETE

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CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
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woodaba said:
Damn, she just insulted a wookiee straight to its face! This girls got balls. I LOVE BALLS!
...wait.
Line of the day.

That made me laugh so much my roommate asked what I was doing.

Alright, question time! What is your personal favorite introduction for any character? They can be from a game, movie, book, whatever you like.
Thanks for reading! Next part will hopefully go up tomorrow.
Can I say ?One of Many? from Mask of the Betrayer?


EEEEEVVVVIIIILLL!
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
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AD-Stu said:
LOL - don't think I remember the dancer scene, or at least I don't remember getting the opportunity to get involved and screw it up. Nice. Was there an alternative solution if you're playing a male character, or did it just not appear at all?

As for introductions, in terms of badassery one of my favourites would have to be Vasquez in Aliens, culminating with the immortal lines:

Hudson: Hey Vasquez, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Vasquez: No - have you?

:p
Normally, you just help her out and she goes on her merry way. This is kinda the "Evil" route, but it really doesn't affect anything. It's just absolutely hilarious.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
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Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
What you're doing now is good.

My my my, though. This is a good game. Your character is kinda an asshole, though.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
What you're doing now is good.

My my my, though. This is a good game. Your character is kinda an asshole, though.
Yeah... I'm usually (read: all the goddamn time) the light side guy in any game, but we did an initial vote on what our initial alignment was, and Evil came out as the overwhelming majority. We'll get a chance to change later on, though.
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
What you're doing now is good.

My my my, though. This is a good game. Your character is kinda an asshole, though.
Yeah... I'm usually (read: all the goddamn time) the light side guy in any game, but we did an initial vote on what our initial alignment was, and Evil came out as the overwhelming majority. We'll get a chance to change later on, though.
I usually play the "Lawful Good" character as well. Almost to the point of suicidal stupidity and complete disregard for one's own life.

There are romances in this game, correct?
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
What you're doing now is good.

My my my, though. This is a good game. Your character is kinda an asshole, though.
Yeah... I'm usually (read: all the goddamn time) the light side guy in any game, but we did an initial vote on what our initial alignment was, and Evil came out as the overwhelming majority. We'll get a chance to change later on, though.
I usually play the "Lawful Good" character as well. Almost to the point of suicidal stupidity and complete disregard for one's own life.

There are romances in this game, correct?
Yes... but they are infamously terrible. There's one for each sex, and the female one in particular is awful. It's essentially just Carth saying "I know you want me" and the Player Character going "No you're a sexist pig." And then they fall in love. Somehow. The Male one is decent, but they are a far cry from Jade Empire and Dragon Age's romances, which I thought were really well done.
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
Update 4: The Riddler Strikes Again

Last time, we left off after ruining a young dancer's career.



Now, we're gonna get some side-quests from a conveniently-located Hutt.



"You intrigue me, disgusting space slime, tell me more."





NO NOT THAT ONE



"Shut up, you Lawful Good pansy. No one gives a damn what you think."





Shut up, Carth.



"The berk turned stag, and now we're all in the styx again. Nick the berk for us, will ya?"



I was under the impression that Bounty Hunters at least tried to bring people in alive. Apparently not on Taris!

Let's got take these bounties down. We know that Selven is somewhere down here...



Gah! Ambush!





We take down the last of the Vulkars, and enter the nearby apartments.





...and we immediately decide to break into someones apartment! YAY! It also seems we've found our first target...

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Matrik!"



"I have no conscience. Time to die." BEST. LINE. EVER.



CARTH! (shakes fist)



"That's what you get for going stag, berk. I'm taking the bounty on your head!"





"Carth, we need to kill this guy! Stop standing there!"

"Duhhh..."



"Well, you were a lot of help there, Asshole."

"Duhh..."



We come across this set up in the next apartment. What on earth is this? It's an entire apartment devoted to an incredibly weird way to keep a chest locked? It's literally a puzzle for puzzle's sake! Who would do that such a thing? Who leave a pointless puzzle for adventurers to solve? Wait a minute...could it be...



DAMN YOU RIDDLER! SO YOU ARE THE TRUE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL OF THIS! I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL YOU ARE BEHIND ARKHAM'S BARS ONCE MORE!

Anyway, this puzzle is pretty cool. You're given a behind-the-music-esqe story of this band, and each of these hologram platforms is named after people who were members of the band. You have to activate the holograms in the order they joined the band.



We do open the chest, and...



...er get a snazzy new outfit. I've given up on the ass situation to be honest.



Some Vulkars in the next room. Doesn't cause us too much trouble.



Unfortunately, we don't find any more bounties. But we do find enough experience to level up.

Since the Vulkars are so rude to us, let's check out the Hidden Bek base. What the hell is a Bek anyway?



Why are there so many K's in people's names down here?

"I go wherever I want!"



"SILENCE FOOL! I MUST SPEAK TO YOUR LEADER!"





"Maybe I could be an ally against all those enemies. I am exceptionally powerful."





no of course not we are entirely reputable and not prone to betraying people at all



"So, you're going to let me in? Are you finished pontificating to yourself?"







And here is the Hidden Bek base. Nothing particularly interesting. There's a load of locked doors, which we can't do anything with. While we run around the base, one woman starts being very rude to us.





Suicide Mission? Better get an expert on this.

D'ya think you'll have any trouble with these guys, Shepard?





Man, these guys are paranoid. We're totally trustworthy! Sort of. In a way. To a certain extent. From a certain point of view. We're more trustworthy than the diabolical Riddler!



(Shakes Fist)







Puh-leez. These people have never been to an airport on Earth, they don't even know what
overzealous means.



"I need information on the Republic Escape Pods that crashed in the Undercity."



Then our disguise is working perfectly.











"Bastila's a slave? Carth, can we give up this ridiculous quest now?"

"No."

"Godammit. What will happen to her now?"





Good job saying that RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF ALL THESE STRANGERS. Idiot.



"What do I have to do to end this ridiculous farce?"







The Vulkars we massacred just to get here would disagree with you, Carth.



So, now KoTOR has turned into a sports movie. The underdog gang gets an outsider to race for them against a fantastically evil and rich gang.

"I don't have a swoop bike, idiot."



"I might help you, if the price is right."









Hooray for cheating!



"How do I know you'll live up to your end of the bargain?"



"How am I supposed to get into the Vulkar Base? This plan is full of holes."





A Kid who can stare A Wookiee in the eye and not flinch. Don't underestimate her.



"Where can I find her?"



Oh, for fucks sake. A lower city to the lower city? This is getting ridiculous.



"I've got some Sith uniforms right here."







"No way! That's the only outfit I have that doesn't cling to my ass like Blu-Tak!"



"Fine, here you go. Can I go now? This conversation is getting verrrry long."



"Not a chance."

Back outside, we come across a mercenary threatening some thugs.











And a Badass strides on in.





Mandalorian! Holy Shit! Like Boba Fett, only good! For those who haven't dived into the Expanded Universe, Mandalorians are essentially Klingons only in Star Wars. Warrior race, obsessed with battle and honor, same shit, different universe. Mandalorians are just much cooler.







There's a apartment complex nearby. Apartments=people to rob.



CALO NORD! YAAY! I LOVE THIS GUY!











Yeah. Don't you guys know? Bounty Hunter don't even bother taking people in alive anymore. Get with the program.



DRAW!







[Insert Duke Nukem One-Liner here]



The scene in the Cantina was so good, Bioware decided to do it again! Only worse.



This place is crawling with Black Vulkars. But we do find some loot in an apartment...



...except its guarded by a mine. I've been looking for a chance to talk about these things. Mines are essentially traps from the old Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights games, except simplified. Their problem is that they are functionally useless outside of very specific situations. You'll be selling a lot of these things if you don't have a high explosives skill.



We also find a suspicous looking corner, and a puzzle.

CURSE YOU RIDDLER!



The way this puzzle works is fairly simple. There's an email on the desk, which contains the answers to questions needed to open the box. Answer the questions right, and you get some loot.



In the next room, we find another one of our bounties: Elam, the assassin.

"I'm here to collect the bounty on your head, Selven!"



"Says the person who dares to battle the all-powerful Varen!"





We take out our pistol and finish her in a single blow. Ok, that's not what happened, but it would be pretty cool to pull an Indiana Jones on her.

With our two bounties in the Lower City sorted, we better get going to the Undercity. Before we get there though...



Goddammit.

I'll see you tommorow, Escapists. Live long, and Prosper until then.

Need some advice from you guys. There's a LOOOONG exposition scene in this one, and it drags on. Do you want me to cut said scenes in the future, summing up what they say, or is what I'm doing now all right?
What you're doing now is good.

My my my, though. This is a good game. Your character is kinda an asshole, though.
Yeah... I'm usually (read: all the goddamn time) the light side guy in any game, but we did an initial vote on what our initial alignment was, and Evil came out as the overwhelming majority. We'll get a chance to change later on, though.
I usually play the "Lawful Good" character as well. Almost to the point of suicidal stupidity and complete disregard for one's own life.

There are romances in this game, correct?
Yes... but they are infamously terrible. There's one for each sex, and the female one in particular is awful. It's essentially just Carth saying "I know you want me" and the Player Character going "No you're a sexist pig." And then they fall in love. Somehow. The Male one is decent, but they are a far cry from Jade Empire and Dragon Age's romances, which I thought were really well done.
I see. It is Bioware, after all. They're known for having some pretty silly romance options.
 

AD-Stu

New member
Oct 13, 2011
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I'm interested to see exactly how bad they get - the only time I've ever played this game through to the end I opted to avoid the romance because I played my character as the goodiest of goody-two-shoes and... well, we all saw how badly getting laid turned out for Anikin, didn't we :p

The way you're handling the long conversations looks fine to me BTW.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
AD-Stu said:
I'm interested to see exactly how bad they get - the only time I've ever played this game through to the end I opted to avoid the romance because I played my character as the goodiest of goody-two-shoes and... well, we all saw how badly getting laid turned out for Anikin, didn't we :p

The way you're handling the long conversations looks fine to me BTW.
I think it more comes down to the fact that the two characters you can romance are the most dull, stereotypical, uninteresting, bland companions you pick up. They may not be all that bad depending on how you look at them, they're just a pet peeve of mine.

We'll get to them eventually.
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
AD-Stu said:
I'm interested to see exactly how bad they get - the only time I've ever played this game through to the end I opted to avoid the romance because I played my character as the goodiest of goody-two-shoes and... well, we all saw how badly getting laid turned out for Anikin, didn't we :p

The way you're handling the long conversations looks fine to me BTW.
I think it more comes down to the fact that the two characters you can romance are the most dull, stereotypical, uninteresting, bland companions you pick up. They may not be all that bad depending on how you look at them, they're just a pet peeve of mine.

We'll get to them eventually.
That tends to be the problem with romances in games, is that they come off as very token most of the time. Mostly because the way it's done is not the way most adults behave.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
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0
UPDATE 5: OUR ZOMBIES ARE DIFFERENT

Sorry about the delay on this one. Went to a hotel over the weekend, forgot to bring laptop.

We left off last time with Carth preparing to moan at us again. Godammit.



"I want to discuss something with you."



"I'd like to know if we have a problem."



"I'm a whiny emo with trust issues so far up my duodenum they come out my mouth."

"Stop imitating me! That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Ok then, asshole. Let's hear your excuse."



Flattery will get you everywhere... except when your Carth.



"Not built that way? Not built that way?! Are you Serious? That has got the lamest excuse I have ever heard."



oh great an rpg character with a traumatic past that has turned them into an emo its not like we don't have enough of those









...Sorry.

"I'm starting to get pretty tired of this attitude of yours. Become a legitimate character already!"



"Don't tell me to take it personally you hairless wookiee!"

I'd like to see what a hairless wookiee looks like. As long as they're wearing pants.



"We'll see who's head explodes, you ungrateful monkey-lizard!"



"Drooling Bomarr cast-off!"

Don't ask me what that means. I think Bioware just started stringing random words together.

"How dare you! Such a greivous insult!"

"There. Gonna mess with me now?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. Feel better now?"

"Not really. This is still serious business."



Bastila? What? Why are you telling me not to trust her? What's going on between you two? Are you hiding something from me?

...wait a minute. Escapists, do me a favor. See Carth's name? Replace the first letter with the letter of the alphabet immediately after it.

Yeah. That can't be a coincidence.

"Pretty pithy advice, I see."



"Yes. Lets."



Up ahead, the Sith are guarding this elevator pretty fervently.





"I've got my security papers right here."



Our elevator ride down is uneventful. Carth farts, and is severely punished for this transgression, but otherwise, nothing happens. As soon as we leave, though...





...we're held up by some highwaymen. If they can really be called such a thing with a straight face.







Five...whole...credits?



"Get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"



Evil is fun.







"It's better than this festering slime pit."









"Rukil? Who's that?"





"The promised land? What's that?"







"Where can I find Rukil? He sounds like a fun person to mock."



What. You live in a rusted, festering, hole, with no healthcare, and very little food. Are you seriously saying that someone lived for 100 years down here? Stop pulling my leg.



"I'll be going now, because you fill me with disgust."





Here we are. The Undercity. The concept behind this place is rather interesting: an entire race of people growing, knowing nothing of life above, even though surfacers are rather common, they will never be able to experience sunshine, or rain, or wind, or anything. Like I said, really good concept. However, it is severely let down by its execution, in that it makes no sense. We literally arrived in the undercity by an elevator, so explain to me how generations of these people will live through their lives never once entertaining the possibility of USING THE FUCKING LIFT. The Sith guard and turrets were set up only after the recent occupation, so it would be very easy to just walk out of the Undercity. Also, all the people down here are human, which means they could easily live in the Upper City. I don't think Bioware thought the Undercity out. That said, the environmental artists really shine here, creating an incredibly bleak atmosphere that simply does not let up.

Rant over, back to the game.



Near the edge of the makeshift town, we see this melodramatic character.

"What on earth are you talking about?"



"So... Zombies. They're zombies."

"No, upworlder. Rahkghouls. Completely Different."

"How?"

"Zombies are called Zombies. Our Zombies are different. They are called Rahkghouls."

"Semantics. The Not-Zombies here bite you..."

"Yes."

"...and you turn into one of them."

"Yes."

"So, Zombies."

"No, Rahkghouls."

"ARRRRGH!"





"That sounds fascinating. I'm totally not going to open their cage and watch them suffer because I totally don't get off on that sort of that thing."

"What?"

"SHUT UP CARTH!"



She's not asking questions. Good. Because it's time for....Mischief!





Oh dear.







OH SHIT SON

Unfortunately, we have to put it down. Pointedly, we finish each one with a headshot.

"Not Zombies!"

"SHUT UP!"



There are more people who haven't turned yet. It's time for that heartbreaking scene in every good not-zombie movie in which the hero tearfully puts a bullet into the bitten persons head.



"Get away from me, diseased mongrels!"

Oh, wait, that's right! We're being a Disney villain!



Somehow, I think Varen is ok with that.

Let's go look for the crazy person the gateperson mentioned.



Ah! Here he is. Can you tell?





Uh huh. I'll keep that in mind, Carth.



"You're obviously a crazy old kook."



We've already established that that makes no sense.



"Get to the point, Old man!"



"The true path? What does that mean?"



"I don't have time for this nonsense."







"What will you give me if I help you?"



"You didn't answer my question. But, I'll be back if I find anything out. But, If I am not given sufficient reward for my actions, there will be a Great Reckoning. I'll do far worse than kill you. I'll hurt you. And I will go on. Hurting you. I will leave you all alone in this place, this center of a planet that hates and fears you. Buried alive.....Buried alive...."

Well, I guess it's time to look for Mission. However, as we go to leave, this guy blocks our way.



For the record, he sounds just like Gollum.



Thank you for this insightful and incredibly helpful comment.



"How do you manage to run a store in the Undercity?"







Near the entrance, we come across this sight.











They're not that close, man. How much of a coward are you?





In the time it took you to have that little dialogue, you could have let him in! Seriously, dude!





What will happen next? Will Varen be uncharacteristically nice? Will Carth become a legitimate character? Will the Not-Zombies eat any brains? Find out all this, and more, tomorrow....

Question Time!

We've all been there, a game/movie/play/book/comic/whatever is based on a really good idea, but for some reason, it just ends up being squandered. Has this ever happened to you? If so, what is the most grievous example?
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
UPDATE 5: OUR ZOMBIES ARE DIFFERENT

Sorry about the delay on this one. Went to a hotel over the weekend, forgot to bring laptop.

We left off last time with Carth preparing to moan at us again. Godammit.



"I want to discuss something with you."



"I'd like to know if we have a problem."



"I'm a whiny emo with trust issues so far up my duodenum they come out my mouth."

"Stop imitating me! That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Ok then, asshole. Let's hear your excuse."



Flattery will get you everywhere... except when your Carth.



"Not built that way? Not built that way?! Are you Serious? That has got the lamest excuse I have ever heard."



oh great an rpg character with a traumatic past that has turned them into an emo its not like we don't have enough of those









...Sorry.

"I'm starting to get pretty tired of this attitude of yours. Become a legitimate character already!"



"Don't tell me to take it personally you hairless wookiee!"

I'd like to see what a hairless wookiee looks like. As long as they're wearing pants.



"We'll see who's head explodes, you ungrateful monkey-lizard!"



"Drooling Bomarr cast-off!"

Don't ask me what that means. I think Bioware just started stringing random words together.

"How dare you! Such a greivous insult!"

"There. Gonna mess with me now?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. Feel better now?"

"Not really. This is still serious business."



Bastila? What? Why are you telling me not to trust her? What's going on between you two? Are you hiding something from me?

...wait a minute. Escapists, do me a favor. See Carth's name? Replace the first letter with the letter of the alphabet immediately after it.

Yeah. That can't be a coincidence.

"Pretty pithy advice, I see."



"Yes. Lets."



Up ahead, the Sith are guarding this elevator pretty fervently.





"I've got my security papers right here."



Our elevator ride down is uneventful. Carth farts, and is severely punished for this transgression, but otherwise, nothing happens. As soon as we leave, though...





...we're held up by some highwaymen. If they can really be called such a thing with a straight face.







Five...whole...credits?



"Get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"



Evil is fun.







"It's better than this festering slime pit."









"Rukil? Who's that?"





"The promised land? What's that?"







"Where can I find Rukil? He sounds like a fun person to mock."



What. You live in a rusted, festering, hole, with no healthcare, and very little food. Are you seriously saying that someone lived for 100 years down here? Stop pulling my leg.



"I'll be going now, because you fill me with disgust."





Here we are. The Undercity. The concept behind this place is rather interesting: an entire race of people growing, knowing nothing of life above, even though surfacers are rather common, they will never be able to experience sunshine, or rain, or wind, or anything. Like I said, really good concept. However, it is severely let down by its execution, in that it makes no sense. We literally arrived in the undercity by an elevator, so explain to me how generations of these people will live through their lives never once entertaining the possibility of USING THE FUCKING LIFT. The Sith guard and turrets were set up only after the recent occupation, so it would be very easy to just walk out of the Undercity. Also, all the people down here are human, which means they could easily live in the Upper City. I don't think Bioware thought the Undercity out. That said, the environmental artists really shine here, creating an incredibly bleak atmosphere that simply does not let up.

Rant over, back to the game.



Near the edge of the makeshift town, we see this melodramatic character.

"What on earth are you talking about?"



"So... Zombies. They're zombies."

"No, upworlder. Rahkghouls. Completely Different."

"How?"

"Zombies are called Zombies. Our Zombies are different. They are called Rahkghouls."

"Semantics. The Not-Zombies here bite you..."

"Yes."

"...and you turn into one of them."

"Yes."

"So, Zombies."

"No, Rahkghouls."

"ARRRRGH!"





"That sounds fascinating. I'm totally not going to open their cage and watch them suffer because I totally don't get off on that sort of that thing."

"What?"

"SHUT UP CARTH!"



She's not asking questions. Good. Because it's time for....Mischief!





Oh dear.







OH SHIT SON

Unfortunately, we have to put it down. Pointedly, we finish each one with a headshot.

"Not Zombies!"

"SHUT UP!"



There are more people who haven't turned yet. It's time for that heartbreaking scene in every good not-zombie movie in which the hero tearfully puts a bullet into the bitten persons head.



"Get away from me, diseased mongrels!"

Oh, wait, that's right! We're being a Disney villain!



Somehow, I think Varen is ok with that.

Let's go look for the crazy person the gateperson mentioned.



Ah! Here he is. Can you tell?





Uh huh. I'll keep that in mind, Carth.



"You're obviously a crazy old kook."



We've already established that that makes no sense.



"Get to the point, Old man!"



"The true path? What does that mean?"



"I don't have time for this nonsense."







"What will you give me if I help you?"



"You didn't answer my question. But, I'll be back if I find anything out. But, If I am not given sufficient reward for my actions, there will be a Great Reckoning. I'll do far worse than kill you. I'll hurt you. And I will go on. Hurting you. I will leave you all alone in this place, this center of a planet that hates and fears you. Buried alive.....Buried alive...."

Well, I guess it's time to look for Mission. However, as we go to leave, this guy blocks our way.



For the record, he sounds just like Gollum.



Thank you for this insightful and incredibly helpful comment.



"How do you manage to run a store in the Undercity?"







Near the entrance, we come across this sight.











They're not that close, man. How much of a coward are you?





In the time it took you to have that little dialogue, you could have let him in! Seriously, dude!





What will happen next? Will Varen be uncharacteristically nice? Will Carth become a legitimate character? Will the Not-Zombies eat any brains? Find out all this, and more, tomorrow....

Question Time!

We've all been there, a game/movie/play/book/comic/whatever is based on a really good idea, but for some reason, it just ends up being squandered. Has this ever happened to you? If so, what is the most grievous example?
I'm going to have to say Dragon Age 2. There was the potential for a really great idea there, which was lost.

Oh, and I'm told Deus Ex: Invisible War is like that, though I've never played it.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
UPDATE 5: OUR ZOMBIES ARE DIFFERENT

Sorry about the delay on this one. Went to a hotel over the weekend, forgot to bring laptop.

We left off last time with Carth preparing to moan at us again. Godammit.



"I want to discuss something with you."



"I'd like to know if we have a problem."



"I'm a whiny emo with trust issues so far up my duodenum they come out my mouth."

"Stop imitating me! That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Ok then, asshole. Let's hear your excuse."



Flattery will get you everywhere... except when your Carth.



"Not built that way? Not built that way?! Are you Serious? That has got the lamest excuse I have ever heard."



oh great an rpg character with a traumatic past that has turned them into an emo its not like we don't have enough of those









...Sorry.

"I'm starting to get pretty tired of this attitude of yours. Become a legitimate character already!"



"Don't tell me to take it personally you hairless wookiee!"

I'd like to see what a hairless wookiee looks like. As long as they're wearing pants.



"We'll see who's head explodes, you ungrateful monkey-lizard!"



"Drooling Bomarr cast-off!"

Don't ask me what that means. I think Bioware just started stringing random words together.

"How dare you! Such a greivous insult!"

"There. Gonna mess with me now?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. Feel better now?"

"Not really. This is still serious business."



Bastila? What? Why are you telling me not to trust her? What's going on between you two? Are you hiding something from me?

...wait a minute. Escapists, do me a favor. See Carth's name? Replace the first letter with the letter of the alphabet immediately after it.

Yeah. That can't be a coincidence.

"Pretty pithy advice, I see."



"Yes. Lets."



Up ahead, the Sith are guarding this elevator pretty fervently.





"I've got my security papers right here."



Our elevator ride down is uneventful. Carth farts, and is severely punished for this transgression, but otherwise, nothing happens. As soon as we leave, though...





...we're held up by some highwaymen. If they can really be called such a thing with a straight face.







Five...whole...credits?



"Get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"



Evil is fun.







"It's better than this festering slime pit."









"Rukil? Who's that?"





"The promised land? What's that?"







"Where can I find Rukil? He sounds like a fun person to mock."



What. You live in a rusted, festering, hole, with no healthcare, and very little food. Are you seriously saying that someone lived for 100 years down here? Stop pulling my leg.



"I'll be going now, because you fill me with disgust."





Here we are. The Undercity. The concept behind this place is rather interesting: an entire race of people growing, knowing nothing of life above, even though surfacers are rather common, they will never be able to experience sunshine, or rain, or wind, or anything. Like I said, really good concept. However, it is severely let down by its execution, in that it makes no sense. We literally arrived in the undercity by an elevator, so explain to me how generations of these people will live through their lives never once entertaining the possibility of USING THE FUCKING LIFT. The Sith guard and turrets were set up only after the recent occupation, so it would be very easy to just walk out of the Undercity. Also, all the people down here are human, which means they could easily live in the Upper City. I don't think Bioware thought the Undercity out. That said, the environmental artists really shine here, creating an incredibly bleak atmosphere that simply does not let up.

Rant over, back to the game.



Near the edge of the makeshift town, we see this melodramatic character.

"What on earth are you talking about?"



"So... Zombies. They're zombies."

"No, upworlder. Rahkghouls. Completely Different."

"How?"

"Zombies are called Zombies. Our Zombies are different. They are called Rahkghouls."

"Semantics. The Not-Zombies here bite you..."

"Yes."

"...and you turn into one of them."

"Yes."

"So, Zombies."

"No, Rahkghouls."

"ARRRRGH!"





"That sounds fascinating. I'm totally not going to open their cage and watch them suffer because I totally don't get off on that sort of that thing."

"What?"

"SHUT UP CARTH!"



She's not asking questions. Good. Because it's time for....Mischief!





Oh dear.







OH SHIT SON

Unfortunately, we have to put it down. Pointedly, we finish each one with a headshot.

"Not Zombies!"

"SHUT UP!"



There are more people who haven't turned yet. It's time for that heartbreaking scene in every good not-zombie movie in which the hero tearfully puts a bullet into the bitten persons head.



"Get away from me, diseased mongrels!"

Oh, wait, that's right! We're being a Disney villain!



Somehow, I think Varen is ok with that.

Let's go look for the crazy person the gateperson mentioned.



Ah! Here he is. Can you tell?





Uh huh. I'll keep that in mind, Carth.



"You're obviously a crazy old kook."



We've already established that that makes no sense.



"Get to the point, Old man!"



"The true path? What does that mean?"



"I don't have time for this nonsense."







"What will you give me if I help you?"



"You didn't answer my question. But, I'll be back if I find anything out. But, If I am not given sufficient reward for my actions, there will be a Great Reckoning. I'll do far worse than kill you. I'll hurt you. And I will go on. Hurting you. I will leave you all alone in this place, this center of a planet that hates and fears you. Buried alive.....Buried alive...."

Well, I guess it's time to look for Mission. However, as we go to leave, this guy blocks our way.



For the record, he sounds just like Gollum.



Thank you for this insightful and incredibly helpful comment.



"How do you manage to run a store in the Undercity?"







Near the entrance, we come across this sight.











They're not that close, man. How much of a coward are you?





In the time it took you to have that little dialogue, you could have let him in! Seriously, dude!





What will happen next? Will Varen be uncharacteristically nice? Will Carth become a legitimate character? Will the Not-Zombies eat any brains? Find out all this, and more, tomorrow....

Question Time!

We've all been there, a game/movie/play/book/comic/whatever is based on a really good idea, but for some reason, it just ends up being squandered. Has this ever happened to you? If so, what is the most grievous example?
I'm going to have to say Dragon Age 2. There was the potential for a really great idea there, which was lost.

Oh, and I'm told Deus Ex: Invisible War is like that, though I've never played it.
Invisible War was made by sadists who wanted to see exactly how badly they could fuck up Deus Ex. The answer: A lot.

I liked Dragon Age II though. It had its flaws, but I thought the main story was much better than Origins' was, even though Origins is a vastly superior game in every other aspect.
 

CM156_v1legacy

Revelation 9:6
Mar 23, 2011
3,997
0
0
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
UPDATE 5: OUR ZOMBIES ARE DIFFERENT

Sorry about the delay on this one. Went to a hotel over the weekend, forgot to bring laptop.

We left off last time with Carth preparing to moan at us again. Godammit.



"I want to discuss something with you."



"I'd like to know if we have a problem."



"I'm a whiny emo with trust issues so far up my duodenum they come out my mouth."

"Stop imitating me! That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Ok then, asshole. Let's hear your excuse."



Flattery will get you everywhere... except when your Carth.



"Not built that way? Not built that way?! Are you Serious? That has got the lamest excuse I have ever heard."



oh great an rpg character with a traumatic past that has turned them into an emo its not like we don't have enough of those









...Sorry.

"I'm starting to get pretty tired of this attitude of yours. Become a legitimate character already!"



"Don't tell me to take it personally you hairless wookiee!"

I'd like to see what a hairless wookiee looks like. As long as they're wearing pants.



"We'll see who's head explodes, you ungrateful monkey-lizard!"



"Drooling Bomarr cast-off!"

Don't ask me what that means. I think Bioware just started stringing random words together.

"How dare you! Such a greivous insult!"

"There. Gonna mess with me now?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. Feel better now?"

"Not really. This is still serious business."



Bastila? What? Why are you telling me not to trust her? What's going on between you two? Are you hiding something from me?

...wait a minute. Escapists, do me a favor. See Carth's name? Replace the first letter with the letter of the alphabet immediately after it.

Yeah. That can't be a coincidence.

"Pretty pithy advice, I see."



"Yes. Lets."



Up ahead, the Sith are guarding this elevator pretty fervently.





"I've got my security papers right here."



Our elevator ride down is uneventful. Carth farts, and is severely punished for this transgression, but otherwise, nothing happens. As soon as we leave, though...





...we're held up by some highwaymen. If they can really be called such a thing with a straight face.







Five...whole...credits?



"Get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"



Evil is fun.







"It's better than this festering slime pit."









"Rukil? Who's that?"





"The promised land? What's that?"







"Where can I find Rukil? He sounds like a fun person to mock."



What. You live in a rusted, festering, hole, with no healthcare, and very little food. Are you seriously saying that someone lived for 100 years down here? Stop pulling my leg.



"I'll be going now, because you fill me with disgust."





Here we are. The Undercity. The concept behind this place is rather interesting: an entire race of people growing, knowing nothing of life above, even though surfacers are rather common, they will never be able to experience sunshine, or rain, or wind, or anything. Like I said, really good concept. However, it is severely let down by its execution, in that it makes no sense. We literally arrived in the undercity by an elevator, so explain to me how generations of these people will live through their lives never once entertaining the possibility of USING THE FUCKING LIFT. The Sith guard and turrets were set up only after the recent occupation, so it would be very easy to just walk out of the Undercity. Also, all the people down here are human, which means they could easily live in the Upper City. I don't think Bioware thought the Undercity out. That said, the environmental artists really shine here, creating an incredibly bleak atmosphere that simply does not let up.

Rant over, back to the game.



Near the edge of the makeshift town, we see this melodramatic character.

"What on earth are you talking about?"



"So... Zombies. They're zombies."

"No, upworlder. Rahkghouls. Completely Different."

"How?"

"Zombies are called Zombies. Our Zombies are different. They are called Rahkghouls."

"Semantics. The Not-Zombies here bite you..."

"Yes."

"...and you turn into one of them."

"Yes."

"So, Zombies."

"No, Rahkghouls."

"ARRRRGH!"





"That sounds fascinating. I'm totally not going to open their cage and watch them suffer because I totally don't get off on that sort of that thing."

"What?"

"SHUT UP CARTH!"



She's not asking questions. Good. Because it's time for....Mischief!





Oh dear.







OH SHIT SON

Unfortunately, we have to put it down. Pointedly, we finish each one with a headshot.

"Not Zombies!"

"SHUT UP!"



There are more people who haven't turned yet. It's time for that heartbreaking scene in every good not-zombie movie in which the hero tearfully puts a bullet into the bitten persons head.



"Get away from me, diseased mongrels!"

Oh, wait, that's right! We're being a Disney villain!



Somehow, I think Varen is ok with that.

Let's go look for the crazy person the gateperson mentioned.



Ah! Here he is. Can you tell?





Uh huh. I'll keep that in mind, Carth.



"You're obviously a crazy old kook."



We've already established that that makes no sense.



"Get to the point, Old man!"



"The true path? What does that mean?"



"I don't have time for this nonsense."







"What will you give me if I help you?"



"You didn't answer my question. But, I'll be back if I find anything out. But, If I am not given sufficient reward for my actions, there will be a Great Reckoning. I'll do far worse than kill you. I'll hurt you. And I will go on. Hurting you. I will leave you all alone in this place, this center of a planet that hates and fears you. Buried alive.....Buried alive...."

Well, I guess it's time to look for Mission. However, as we go to leave, this guy blocks our way.



For the record, he sounds just like Gollum.



Thank you for this insightful and incredibly helpful comment.



"How do you manage to run a store in the Undercity?"







Near the entrance, we come across this sight.











They're not that close, man. How much of a coward are you?





In the time it took you to have that little dialogue, you could have let him in! Seriously, dude!





What will happen next? Will Varen be uncharacteristically nice? Will Carth become a legitimate character? Will the Not-Zombies eat any brains? Find out all this, and more, tomorrow....

Question Time!

We've all been there, a game/movie/play/book/comic/whatever is based on a really good idea, but for some reason, it just ends up being squandered. Has this ever happened to you? If so, what is the most grievous example?
I'm going to have to say Dragon Age 2. There was the potential for a really great idea there, which was lost.

Oh, and I'm told Deus Ex: Invisible War is like that, though I've never played it.
Invisible War was made by sadists who wanted to see exactly how badly they could fuck up Deus Ex. The answer: A lot.

I liked Dragon Age II though. It had its flaws, but I thought the main story was much better than Origins' was, even though Origins is a vastly superior game in every other aspect.
I only just got Deus Ex. And the verdict so far is that I'm really not good at it. Like, at ALL.

Eh, I don't know about the story. All I know is that I hope they improve the formula when DA :III comes out.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
CM156 said:
woodaba said:
UPDATE 5: OUR ZOMBIES ARE DIFFERENT

Sorry about the delay on this one. Went to a hotel over the weekend, forgot to bring laptop.

We left off last time with Carth preparing to moan at us again. Godammit.



"I want to discuss something with you."



"I'd like to know if we have a problem."



"I'm a whiny emo with trust issues so far up my duodenum they come out my mouth."

"Stop imitating me! That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Ok then, asshole. Let's hear your excuse."



Flattery will get you everywhere... except when your Carth.



"Not built that way? Not built that way?! Are you Serious? That has got the lamest excuse I have ever heard."



oh great an rpg character with a traumatic past that has turned them into an emo its not like we don't have enough of those









...Sorry.

"I'm starting to get pretty tired of this attitude of yours. Become a legitimate character already!"



"Don't tell me to take it personally you hairless wookiee!"

I'd like to see what a hairless wookiee looks like. As long as they're wearing pants.



"We'll see who's head explodes, you ungrateful monkey-lizard!"



"Drooling Bomarr cast-off!"

Don't ask me what that means. I think Bioware just started stringing random words together.

"How dare you! Such a greivous insult!"

"There. Gonna mess with me now?"

"Wouldn't dream of it. Feel better now?"

"Not really. This is still serious business."



Bastila? What? Why are you telling me not to trust her? What's going on between you two? Are you hiding something from me?

...wait a minute. Escapists, do me a favor. See Carth's name? Replace the first letter with the letter of the alphabet immediately after it.

Yeah. That can't be a coincidence.

"Pretty pithy advice, I see."



"Yes. Lets."



Up ahead, the Sith are guarding this elevator pretty fervently.





"I've got my security papers right here."



Our elevator ride down is uneventful. Carth farts, and is severely punished for this transgression, but otherwise, nothing happens. As soon as we leave, though...





...we're held up by some highwaymen. If they can really be called such a thing with a straight face.







Five...whole...credits?



"Get out of here you filthy beggars, or I'll use my blaster to end your suffering permanently!"



Evil is fun.







"It's better than this festering slime pit."









"Rukil? Who's that?"





"The promised land? What's that?"







"Where can I find Rukil? He sounds like a fun person to mock."



What. You live in a rusted, festering, hole, with no healthcare, and very little food. Are you seriously saying that someone lived for 100 years down here? Stop pulling my leg.



"I'll be going now, because you fill me with disgust."





Here we are. The Undercity. The concept behind this place is rather interesting: an entire race of people growing, knowing nothing of life above, even though surfacers are rather common, they will never be able to experience sunshine, or rain, or wind, or anything. Like I said, really good concept. However, it is severely let down by its execution, in that it makes no sense. We literally arrived in the undercity by an elevator, so explain to me how generations of these people will live through their lives never once entertaining the possibility of USING THE FUCKING LIFT. The Sith guard and turrets were set up only after the recent occupation, so it would be very easy to just walk out of the Undercity. Also, all the people down here are human, which means they could easily live in the Upper City. I don't think Bioware thought the Undercity out. That said, the environmental artists really shine here, creating an incredibly bleak atmosphere that simply does not let up.

Rant over, back to the game.



Near the edge of the makeshift town, we see this melodramatic character.

"What on earth are you talking about?"



"So... Zombies. They're zombies."

"No, upworlder. Rahkghouls. Completely Different."

"How?"

"Zombies are called Zombies. Our Zombies are different. They are called Rahkghouls."

"Semantics. The Not-Zombies here bite you..."

"Yes."

"...and you turn into one of them."

"Yes."

"So, Zombies."

"No, Rahkghouls."

"ARRRRGH!"





"That sounds fascinating. I'm totally not going to open their cage and watch them suffer because I totally don't get off on that sort of that thing."

"What?"

"SHUT UP CARTH!"



She's not asking questions. Good. Because it's time for....Mischief!





Oh dear.







OH SHIT SON

Unfortunately, we have to put it down. Pointedly, we finish each one with a headshot.

"Not Zombies!"

"SHUT UP!"



There are more people who haven't turned yet. It's time for that heartbreaking scene in every good not-zombie movie in which the hero tearfully puts a bullet into the bitten persons head.



"Get away from me, diseased mongrels!"

Oh, wait, that's right! We're being a Disney villain!



Somehow, I think Varen is ok with that.

Let's go look for the crazy person the gateperson mentioned.



Ah! Here he is. Can you tell?





Uh huh. I'll keep that in mind, Carth.



"You're obviously a crazy old kook."



We've already established that that makes no sense.



"Get to the point, Old man!"



"The true path? What does that mean?"



"I don't have time for this nonsense."







"What will you give me if I help you?"



"You didn't answer my question. But, I'll be back if I find anything out. But, If I am not given sufficient reward for my actions, there will be a Great Reckoning. I'll do far worse than kill you. I'll hurt you. And I will go on. Hurting you. I will leave you all alone in this place, this center of a planet that hates and fears you. Buried alive.....Buried alive...."

Well, I guess it's time to look for Mission. However, as we go to leave, this guy blocks our way.



For the record, he sounds just like Gollum.



Thank you for this insightful and incredibly helpful comment.



"How do you manage to run a store in the Undercity?"







Near the entrance, we come across this sight.











They're not that close, man. How much of a coward are you?





In the time it took you to have that little dialogue, you could have let him in! Seriously, dude!





What will happen next? Will Varen be uncharacteristically nice? Will Carth become a legitimate character? Will the Not-Zombies eat any brains? Find out all this, and more, tomorrow....

Question Time!

We've all been there, a game/movie/play/book/comic/whatever is based on a really good idea, but for some reason, it just ends up being squandered. Has this ever happened to you? If so, what is the most grievous example?
I'm going to have to say Dragon Age 2. There was the potential for a really great idea there, which was lost.

Oh, and I'm told Deus Ex: Invisible War is like that, though I've never played it.
Invisible War was made by sadists who wanted to see exactly how badly they could fuck up Deus Ex. The answer: A lot.

I liked Dragon Age II though. It had its flaws, but I thought the main story was much better than Origins' was, even though Origins is a vastly superior game in every other aspect.
I only just got Deus Ex. And the verdict so far is that I'm really not good at it. Like, at ALL.

Eh, I don't know about the story. All I know is that I hope they improve the formula when DA :III comes out.
Bioware said they are looking at Skyrim for inspiration for DA:III. Read: EA looked at the, frankly, ridiculous success of Skyrim and said "We want some of that. Bioware! Make a Skyrim clone!" So, no chance of the formula improving then.

Everyone is bad at Deus Ex when they start out. Its a game that takes a lot of getting used to.
 

woodaba

New member
May 31, 2011
1,011
0
0
MacNille said:
The ending to DA 2 pissed me off so much, that i still hate it.
The ending was atrocious, but the final battle of Kirkwall was very well done, I thought. You really saw the flaws in both sides, the heroes and villains that occupied both sides of the conflict.

I also loved the way companions would turn against you if they weren't closeenough to you. I didn't use Fenris at all, so he turned against me.