Ok, a bunch of things here to respond to and not a whole lot of time to do it in. I'll have to cherry pick a few here but I have read all of them.
1: I only like one kind of woman. An assumption rightly made because I got lazy just used what was in my Tinypic history rather than actually providing a bit more variety. To remedy here are a few that don't just fall in with the rest like last time;
2: I don't know really why I
like them, other than the physical attractiveness. I mean, I can name things about them I like; like how I find Tsukiumi's over-proper speech really cute, or how playful and cuddly Holo and Sherufanir are/would be, or how proper and lady-like Helena is but its hard to nail down anything in particular I really "like".
3: I do actually take care of myself, unlike what some people were assuming. Keep my hair trimmed, bathe, dress somewhat decently (no holes in clothes etc.) etc. But I didn't get any natural good looks, and there is little trying to force myself to look better would do. Especially since the biggest thing can't ever be changed; my eyes aren't even - they're level but not the same size (and my nose isn't quite even either) which means my face is obviously not symmetric to anyone looking at it. All other things aside, something like that makes people automatically less comfortable and trusting of a person - its really easy to screw up a first impression that way.
4: Its not like I never tried to other things people might be interested in, but either I didn't like them or was so terrible at them that people didn't want me around. Everything from skiing (I was actually so bad at it that I was barred from coming back to the mountain because I was such a danger to other people) to lacrosse to writing, etc. There are only three things I've never been absolutely miserable at, and those are: school, video games and work. And once I got to college I realized I'm not really that good at any of those either, despite years of practice and trying (And of those I fucked up the ONE time I shouldn't have and because I did now I'm $60,000 in debt instead of $15-20,000).
5: Confidence/self-esteem has to originate in something. It doesn't appear out of nowhere or from nothing. If you don't have anything for it to come from, you don't really got it.
6: I've tried taking the "Well, at least I....." approach. But I could never come up with anything that I could do or had that almost any other guy I've met/known could do, in addition to having other things.
7: Yeah I have social issues stemming from growing up. Long story short; everyone including the girls beat up on me in elementary school, for middle and high school I went to a school where they were no girls (and was still picked on) at all and then went to college where the male female ratio was 9-1 when I started as a freshman. And the college was extremely competitive socially and absolutely brimming with the kinds of guys that make a quiet, nerdy guy like me look like something to peeled off your shoe.
I'd respond to more, but I'm kind of out of time for now. I'll try back later.
