Make your job title sound better

[Jacklin]

i sell happiness in 1 gram bags

 

[Uber Evil]

I am a freeman. I/E Unemployed. (I seriously hope noone ninja'd me to this.)

 

[Zaverexus]

Acquisitioner of Assorted Knowledge and Skills (Student)

 

[toastmaster2k8]

Fire Fighter is good.... But I would like it Fire Warrior!

 

[Furbyz]

Lobster Claw Rubber Band Application Technician

 

[ryanthemadman]

deliverer of thing both delicious and warm and round

 

[DJStickyWicket]

Hmmm I'm an infantryman, so I'd say... ANGEL OF DEATH!

 

[Sanies]

Human and machine interaction facilitator.

(Lane instructor/mechanic at a bowling alley)

 

[Moooo4me]

I work as the Sodium Hydroxide Distributor and Pecuniary Transaction Overseer for a pretzel shop.

I serve the pretzels and work the as the cashier.

 

[Woodsey]

I'm a kitchen porter, but for a recent job application I listed my self as a catering assistant.

Alternatively: Crockery Shine Specialist.

 

[xXAsherahXx]

I'm a freelancing philosopher ready to tackle today's most pressing issues in a very intelligent, well-researched manner. And also, I just woke up.

Translation: I think about shit, but I'm unemployed.

I still think I could be a great news reporter since all the rest here don't have a grip on reality at all.

 

[MetalMagpie]

Well my actual job title (the one on my contract) is Technical Account Manager. I'm part programmer, part liaison between client and team. Not sure how to epic that up...

Master Code Manipulator and Communicator?

 

[M920CAIN]

I'm an Interactive Entertainment Industry Analyzer (gamer).

 

[Gibboniser]

Unununemployed. Or field tester of leisure activities.

 

[ShindoL Shill]

Door to Door Written Media Distributor for a Local Sales Company of Multiple National News Research and Reporting Corporations.

 

[UnknownGunslinger]

Freelance Concept Artis!!!
I'm not joking that's what they call a post-graduate jobless artist i.e. me

 

[TheHecatomb]

Senior graphic design & realization manager. Or something like that.

Basically I just design shit, make sure my army of monkeys print stickers out of it and then I proceed to wrap cars in it.

 

[theguitarhero6]

Well, I'm an Usher at the local theater, which is actually probably a step up from what the title ought to be (Glorified Janitor or A Grunt With A Tie).