Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[Grim327]

I take a seat at a table and get ready to eat, " I say we figure out who this G-Man is. He must know all of us from somewhere, right?"

 

[Saltarius]

"I see. Nothing much for me. Degree in Engineering. B Average. Laid off last week. Fired from my first job for pushing my douche co-worker off the roof. From the east coast of the US."

I rub my cigar in an ashtray on the table and lean forward so the group can listen.

"What we really need, is a chance to take a swing at the G-Man."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"I was raised by Scott Pilgrim fans after being abandoned at a midnight showing, they taught me the code I live by, and how to fight. Also they helped me understand the plot of Homestuck but that's not really relevant. Also where did Knife go?"

 

[Grim327]

"I guess it's my turn, huh? Well I grew up on the east coast as well, and was an avid computer programmer. . .OK I was a hacker, a good one. I was actually getting ready to hack the CIA computers, and I came here to grab some more keyboards and monitors. And about that G-Man. If we are going to hit him we first need to find him."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Knife? He's still sleeping in the van. As for the G-man? I don't know, I mean I don't think I've met you guys before today. Maybe we all came across him at a gathering."

 

[Saltarius]

"Well, I doubt he's my co-worker, unless you all happen to know Derek Sullivan, douchebag extraordinaire. I don't recall if he ever survived the fall. Still if he lived he'd probably be paralyzed for life unless he made a deal with Yog-sothoth or Nyarlathotep or some other Lovecraftian horror.

As for Knife...oh shit."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Even if he is running this infinite mall I highly doubt he's in it with a bunch of people who people who are pissed at him and have access to every weapon in the universe. If we could get to Knife's mall we might be able to find where the centre of all this is."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Hold up. That got me thinking, do you reckon there are hundreds of these malls? Each one being controlled by different individuals?"

 

[Grim327]

"Wait a minute, what if Knife is trying to sneak up on us right now? Salt, are you thinking the same thing?"

 

[Saltarius]

"Shit, even worse, what if all these malls are controlled by people who have been given control by aliens or the devil or the Flying Spaghetti Monster or god knows what?"

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Look, I'm certain I put him in the van when he fell asleep."

 

[MinimanZombie]

I stand up with machete in hand. "I suggest you get off him".

 

[Paddy the Second]

"dude seriously, you are a terrible flirt. Also I see no sword, because if you really care about it enough to pull all this shit you'd have recognised it by now, and I'm not carrying a sword anyway, I am carrying Pimpbastard, awe inspiring slayer of worlds!"

 

[Saltarius]

"Additionally, my associates and I tend to dislike ruffians such as yourself interrupting our heavenly little lunch break"

I crack my knuckle and turn the gloves on.

"I suggest you leave, before we get violent."

 

[Grim327]

"Now calm down, Eric. I'm sure Paddy has a good explanation to where your sword is. You don't need to rip his head off and kick it around like a soccer ball. Just sit down and we can talk about this over some giant steak and beer."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Now the way you're talking about it makes it sound like some kind of legendary weapon. G-Man doesn't like people bringing their own in here."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"So, how is this gonna go Eric? You can leave now, or die. Your choice."

 

[Saltarius]

"I say we kill him and add his skull yo our collection."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"Yeah, fuck it" I begin stabbing Eric.