Most Ridiculous Health Items In Games

[Theron Julius]

Vittles from Red Dead Redemption. Yep, a bit of what appears to be deer jerky can heal bullet wounds, cougar mauling, bear mauling, wolf mauling, horse trampling, sever burns, shrapnel from a dynamite explosions, and of course broken bones from jumping off a cliff. That's what I call some good jerky! Mmmmmmm!

 

[Misterian]

I'd say the coins in the 3D Mario games.

Unless Mario was somehow using to coins to pay for instant medical treatment.

Also, I played a game-movie tie-in called Series of Unfortunate Events, and in it, you pick up lockets to increase health, a locket, seriously?

And Fallout 3, just how often do you regain health in a game from drinking from a toilet?

Gex francise, in it you eat flies to regain health, I know Gex is a gecko but...

Geist, as a ghost, you use plants to regain health, that is, you suck the life out of them, not eat or take them.

If you played the right games, the list can be endless.

 

[traineesword]

i was annoyed by Metal Gear Solid: Portable OPs
thoughout the entire Metal Gear Series, and even peacewalker after it, shovelling rations into your mouth whilst the enemy can't move because you're in some magical instant-weapon-item-change land... so why the hell did Portable OP never tell me that suddenly we'd swapped to Med-Kits for health and that Rations cure a very annoying Hunger/Stamina bar.

it annoyed me how i had to find out by myself, and sure, you can be sat there at the computer reading this, thinking "huh, what a retard, obviously a med kit is going to heal your health, anyone could see that"
and yes, as soon as i got an item labelled "med kit" i figured out straight away this must be the thing that cures my health... its just i didn't get any med-kits for quite a while, so i wasted quite a few rations attempting to heal myself. rations which i could have done with later on, stupid stamina bar goes down so bloody quick, and for every single one of your deployed troops! GAAAAH!

Ape escape you pick up cookies... but the way the game is played, i don't think you actually do get hurt yourself. i think its literally, the character is carrying around 5 cookies in his pocket. when a monkey lashes out at him, it hits one of the cookie sin his pocket, so it cracks slightly, breaking entirely next time he gets hit. things like missiles destroy a whole cookie. so actually, its not that he's so beaten up that he falls down in a faint, its actually that the protaganist (whoever it is depending on the game) has run out of cookies to eat after the mission, so they fall down in despair, not willing to go on without the prize at the end.
that also explains why you get an extra life by picking up T-shirts/jackets idential to the one you're wearing... because they must be new pieces of clothing you've left around, so each hold 5 cookies, much to your pleasure.

wow, i thought about that too much... but thinking about it a bit more, it could be right, because i seem to remember what looks like crumbs fly off the character when he gets hit.

 

[Space Spoons]

I think it's the Final Fight series where, after punching a trash can, you walk over a roast chicken, thus eating it with your feet/legs. One would think eating a roast chicken out of the garbage would give you salmonella or, some sort of parasite. Yet in game, it restores your health.

This. Also, eating the chewing gum Edi. E spits out at the end of Stage 3 refills your health almost entirely. Gross.

 

[traineesword]

I'd say the coins in the 3D Mario games.

Unless Mario was somehow using to coins to pay for instant medical treatment.

hahaha, this made me laugh... what i also found odd, but this only works in Mario 64, is that by going into water, swimming down and then returning to the surface, you regain all the health that you lost. so okay, i can get how health comes back when you lost oxygen and were starting to drown, but you can literally jump in the water and come back up and any wounds you got from fighting baddies will be instantly gone.
maybe magic instant Hospitals accept the wetness from Mario's Mustache as payment?