Name a personal Epic Fail.

[DkLnBr]

The biggest fail I've done (so far...) happened summer of 2011. I was painting pipes out in an oil field when I got to a pipe about 10' above the ground. So far everything is pretty routine, I just grab a nearby ladder and set it up. The problem was that there was a raised area below the pipe, so that the left leg of the ladder was 6" off the ground. My genius solution was to put the ladder on the closest flat ground to the pipe! which means that the ladder is now set up at a 45 degree angle. When I climbed up and started painting the ladder inevitably slipped, and my thumb got pinched between the rung I was holding and a washer on the pipe. Took out a chunk of my thumb at the base of the nail (I got lucky with a glancing hit, a direct one might have cost me much more). Fortunately the worst damage was to the nail bed, so the only lasting damage is that my nail doesn't grow properly

 

[Zanderinfal]

Sliding across a wet wooden panel only to faceplant and bruise the right side of my face. One of many fails, including falling off of a trampoline and splitting my face open when I was five, getting a thorn in my eye (which was dealt with, it was just painful), being bitten by a horse on the middle finger and breaking my arm falling down a hill at school.

Yeah...

I'm pretty clumsy.

Well, I'm in love with someone who currently doesn't even live in the same country as me. Does that count?

Except, on a way smaller scale.

 

[Happiness Assassin]

I have a severe stuttering problem, especially in front of crowds. I also have a pretty bad memory problems, making it difficult for me to remember specific words. In my high school English class we had to memorize and perform a scene from Hamlet. Between my performance issues, the fact that I got one of the longest monologues in the play, and the fact that I was following the best group in the class, all I can say is that "Epic Fail" doesn't even begin to describe it. Over this excruciating minute and a half of stuttering, I could visibly see the anguish that the audience was feeling on their faces. I can only imagine what I looked like.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

I was playing my psp in the dark to keep the game atmospheric, it was a story-based Jrpg (Legend of heroes: trails in the sky) so I liked the immersion factor of playing in darkness with earphones on. The psp needed to be charged and being in a new place at the time I was just splayed out on the floor in a futon-style floor mattress so the charger and every other thing was basically in the same height level. I get the charger to maneuver to my comfortable position and I connect it to the psp, eventually I go to grab a drink of water from a near-full glass I had nearby and what do I see. The electric current transmuter box of the psp charger (this square box that has the cable that goes to the plug on one side and the one that goes in the psp on the other) was fully submerged into the water of my glass. It must have stayed there for at LEAST 5 minutes. Having earphones on as I pulled the cables closer to my position I didn't even notice it and it's a miracle I didn't get electrocuted since I kinda felt for it at first, not knowing what was that odd plastic material inside the water.


I freaked as soon as I realized it, took it out of the psp and then unplugged it carefully, then proceeded to shake it furiously and there was just...so much water coming out of it. It somehow was NOT ruined by it's dive though. After a couple of days of letting it dry completely it still worked fine and it has done that to this day!

 

[likalaruku]

As a cook, I naturally fear kitchen related disasters. I was also "blessed" with one of those naggy moms that never lets you forget that you made a mistake, ever.

I once made a chicken enchilada casserole with flour tortillas instead of corn tostadas or tortilla chips. The end result was that it turned into a giant chicken dumpling. My family HATES dumplings. That was 3 years ago; mom still likes to joke about it.

 

[prowll]

As a cook, I naturally fear kitchen related disasters. I was also "blessed" with one of those naggy moms that never lets you forget that you made a mistake, ever.

I once made a chicken enchilada casserole with flour tortillas instead of corn tostadas or tortilla chips. The end result was that it turned into a giant chicken dumpling. My family HATES dumplings. That was 3 years ago; mom still likes to joke about it.

I can totally understand your situation, and have a couple kitchen disasters to my name as well. My mom, however, stopped being so critical after she baked a potholder into the christmas stuffing...

 

[thiosk]

I don't let any of my past fails linger, because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darn'it, people want to fuck me.

 

[The Hero Killer]

Ever since I was like 11 I've been into computers. I like building them, programming them, and just spending time on them. So why did I go to college for criminal justice? 4 and a half years later I'm sitting here with a degree in a field that I want nothing to do with simply because I didnt want to take any math classes that a computer science degree entailed. Funny part is, when I was at university I barely passed the majority of my CJ classes, but my core math classes? Got A's.

 

[VeryOddGamer]

When I was in London on my way to the I tripped on a higher part of the sidewalk and fractured my wrist. Yeah, kind of embarrassing.
Another thing in a similar vein was this one time in a cabin at Christmas. I went to a sauna, and when I came out, I was quite dizzy, and then I fell over and cut my chin in a nearby windowsill. I still have the scar.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

As a cook, I naturally fear kitchen related disasters. I was also "blessed" with one of those naggy moms that never lets you forget that you made a mistake, ever.

I once made a chicken enchilada casserole with flour tortillas instead of corn tostadas or tortilla chips. The end result was that it turned into a giant chicken dumpling. My family HATES dumplings. That was 3 years ago; mom still likes to joke about it.

What is it about dumplings that they hate? They tend to be really awesome, especially those asian soup-dumplings.

 

[lechat]

I barber chaired a tree i was falling once.

that count ? since if it rolled the other way i'd have been hurt or killed

What does 'barber chaired a tree' mean? I'm guessing that 'falling' means you were cutting it down? Sorry if I'm unfamiliar with the slang.

not surprised, yo kinda have to be around loggers to hear it

i was falling the tree (cutting it down) and it did that. not good, and it can kill you

should always wedge the opposite side of your cut
for the guy that dropped a tree on a car: when done properly it also helps to point the tree in the right direction and if you combine a rope to the highest point of a tree you can (almost) always send it where you want. however if done incorrectly what you end up with is the base of a tree sucker punching you in the face

 

[uchytjes]

As a kid, I was told to clean my room and not go to my grandma and grandpa's house. Can you guess what I did?

Well, my parents found out not when they noticed I was gone, but when my grandparents called them telling them I had put my hand through a window. Emergency room + me screeming = a horrible lesson that I only heed most of the time.

 

[ZippyDSMlee]

Just look at my profile I fail hard ><

 

[Calibanbutcher]

As a cook, I naturally fear kitchen related disasters. I was also "blessed" with one of those naggy moms that never lets you forget that you made a mistake, ever.

I once made a chicken enchilada casserole with flour tortillas instead of corn tostadas or tortilla chips. The end result was that it turned into a giant chicken dumpling. My family HATES dumplings. That was 3 years ago; mom still likes to joke about it.

What is it about dumplings that they hate? They tend to be really awesome, especially those asian soup-dumplings.

Or try the german version, called "Maultaschen" they are friggin awesome.


On a related note:
My karate teacher once dared us to punch a (wooden) wall and offered to buy whoever managed to put a hole in the wall a beer.
Naturally I had to accept that challenge and went on to punch the wall with everything I had.
Dear deity-of-choice did that hurt, sweet mother of everything did that ever HURT.
My knuckles were swolen for a good few days and quite blue for a bit more than a week.
I did manage to put a hole in that wall, though and I did get that beer.

 

[Zeren]

When I was about 14 I made a rope out of dog leashes, tied it to my two story chimney and tried to rappel down the side. My hand got caught and I was left dangling one story up with concrete below. I had made a harness that I had attached to the rope, so I though that would catch me when I let go and fell. I had made the rope far too long and fell to the concrete. I sprained my ankle very badly and broke a stereo that I had brought out to give me action music. I was forced to crawl back into the house because my ankle couldn't support my weight. When my Mom came home she slapped me for being so stupid.

 

[Ldude893]

One certain email to a girl from a summer program for teenagers. Let's just say that after that I'm VERY reluctant at sending emails before I properly check that I'm not spewing incoherent text.

 

[teebeeohh]

I love cherries, I hate cherries in cake and decided at age 9 to pick and eat all the cherries from my grandmas tree to save them. I got a broken arm and nasty scar on my head for that.
And I destroyed the best relationship I ever had because I wouldn't admit to myself that I was suffering from a severe depression and that popping pills and smiling was not a solution

 

[Lunar Templar]

I barber chaired a tree i was falling once.

that count ? since if it rolled the other way i'd have been hurt or killed

What does 'barber chaired a tree' mean? I'm guessing that 'falling' means you were cutting it down? Sorry if I'm unfamiliar with the slang.

not surprised, yo kinda have to be around loggers to hear it

i was falling the tree (cutting it down) and it did that. not good, and it can kill you

should always wedge the opposite side of your cut
for the guy that dropped a tree on a car: when done properly it also helps to point the tree in the right direction and if you combine a rope to the highest point of a tree you can (almost) always send it where you want. however if done incorrectly what you end up with is the base of a tree sucker punching you in the face

tieing it off kinda wasn't an option at the time, not that the direction was the problem, plus it was an Alder so putting a wedge in it wouldn't have helped much. but it was the only tree on the sight that did that so it's not what i was doing

 

[Jenvas1306]

hmm, when I was a teen I once broke out a part of a tooth...
It was a very windy day and I covered my face from the wind and ran into a lamppost