Nay! All shall pay for the sins they have committed, no man is above Divine judgment! All shall be judged and dealt swift blows of justice for their crimes! And a night with Chuck Norris would allow you to gain all of the universes' knowledge!Xpwn3ntial said:
Name one character from any medium that pisses you off, and describe how you would beat them.
- Thread starter Hectix777
- Start date
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Cole's loser friend Zeke from inFamous. I would beat him by throwing the Tesla Ball from Dead Rising 2 at his fat gut before ramming the thing down his throat.
YOU SELFISH JERK YOU THINK LIGHTNING POWERS ARE GREAT ENOUGH TO KILL THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE, YEAH?! WELL CHOKE ON SOME LIGHTNING POWERS OF MINE! STOP WASTING AN ACTUAL SUPER HEROES TIME WITH YOUR WHINY NEEDY DESIRES!
I swear, he's worse than Navi from Zelda!
YOU SELFISH JERK YOU THINK LIGHTNING POWERS ARE GREAT ENOUGH TO KILL THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE, YEAH?! WELL CHOKE ON SOME LIGHTNING POWERS OF MINE! STOP WASTING AN ACTUAL SUPER HEROES TIME WITH YOUR WHINY NEEDY DESIRES!
I swear, he's worse than Navi from Zelda!
Bare penis hands?Johnnyallstar said:
A character from any medium...myself? Can I choose myself? How would I beat myself...well, not so much beat, as change. Gender, that is. I might do better if I was born a guy.
But then I'd be a sexually and physically aggressive guy.
Or maybe if I can just grow a penis. That would solve everything.
I am so confused right now.
FFXIII was the only one I've played, but from what I hear from other FF fans that's about what they want to do. Vaan I can totally see, he looks like a tool and a douche.Hectix777 said:
Chuck Norris is nothing compared to my avatar, because I can get more than just all knowledge out of her in one night. Even memetic Chuck Norris is nothing compared to my avatar.Hectix777 said:
Give me a night with Commissar Yarrick on the other hand...
I get the feeling this is a joke thread, but I actually did write out a revenge fantasy for some characters in the game Crescendo. I don't think they were ever named. I don't think it matters.
I always have to laugh at complaints about "every emo and FF character evars!!1" You don't know what hate is.
The absolute worst part, though, was that my revenge fantasy was all I got. Those shit-eating pig-sodomizing rapists are never even mentioned in-game after the incident, let alone getting any sort of karmic backlash. That really ruined a story route that I was otherwise enjoying.
Oh god, that guy again. I...I feel sick. This happened with Aeka, too, didn't it. Please, no...
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...throats. Cut their throats. Carve their bodies. Blood. Spill their blood. Castrate them. Choke them with their severed dicks. Piss in their eyes. Mutilate their corpses. Desecrate their graves. Set fire to their homes. Eradicate every record that they ever existed.
...no, not enough. Not enough pain. Sever their tendons. Cut their hamstrings and make them crawl. Salt the wounds. Kick in their kidneys. Start flaying them one extremity at a time. Make them scream. And when they've almost screamed themselves out, stab their vocal cords. Laugh at their breathy cries. Throw them against a wall, pile them in a corner, douse them in lighter fluid. Make sure their eyes are open as you torch them.
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...throats. Cut their throats. Carve their bodies. Blood. Spill their blood. Castrate them. Choke them with their severed dicks. Piss in their eyes. Mutilate their corpses. Desecrate their graves. Set fire to their homes. Eradicate every record that they ever existed.
...no, not enough. Not enough pain. Sever their tendons. Cut their hamstrings and make them crawl. Salt the wounds. Kick in their kidneys. Start flaying them one extremity at a time. Make them scream. And when they've almost screamed themselves out, stab their vocal cords. Laugh at their breathy cries. Throw them against a wall, pile them in a corner, douse them in lighter fluid. Make sure their eyes are open as you torch them.
I always have to laugh at complaints about "every emo and FF character evars!!1" You don't know what hate is.
The absolute worst part, though, was that my revenge fantasy was all I got. Those shit-eating pig-sodomizing rapists are never even mentioned in-game after the incident, let alone getting any sort of karmic backlash. That really ruined a story route that I was otherwise enjoying.
Shinji Ikari. No one else can compare. Ever. He must be hit upside the head with a bomb, twice a day, without a condom.
Why? Because he had a reasonable reaction to the life he had and the situations he was forced into?DrNobody18 said:
Vurdmeister Neph Dada.
I fucking hated him so much. I was really digging the idea of Logan and Jenine, then that greedy fuck had to ship her off to Khalidor to try and impress Garoth, and caused her to end up with Dorian.
Sasuke Uchiha. How you ask? Well I would gather up a horde of anime fangirls, administer the T-Virus to the lot of them, and surgically replace their fingertips with scalpels, pneumatic punches, drill bits, electrodes, and rusty razorblades. Then I would castrate the little sod and tie him to a chair before releasing the zombie fangirls into the same room and video taping it from 4 angles using security cameras. Then I would sell the tapes and make a fortune.
His reasonable reaction clause ran out when it was clear that inaction, meant that he, and everyone else he knew, would die. And his reaction was, inaction. He even realized this when he had his classmates inside the plug with him during that one fight, he knew that inaction meant people he knew would die. His final solution? Fuck people, lets all die.Xpwn3ntial said:
Ninja'd.NeutralDrow said:
My own example would be the grandpa of one of the love inters in a VN. He did not get what he deserved. And what Drow descibes in the spoiles is what I would have done to the grandpa. And I have to side with NeutralDrow on this one. You do not now what hate against a character is.
I've got one better. In Rebuild 2.22, he started instrumentality just to get Rei out of the Angel that ate her and EVA Unit 00.DrNobody18 said:
On to my counterpoint (which also applies to my Rebuild instance): despair. Again, perfectly reasonable reaction. There was no foreseeable end to the fighting (from his less than omniscient perspective) and humanity was utterly doomed anyway. You may not consider that a sufficient reason to abstain from fighting, but I was never about to change your mind. I understand that now.
Amen to that, my friends. Huzzah for penis...es.Paksenarrion said:
ANYway. I can't really think of any annoying characters.
Well, maybe besides the Annoying Fan. Yeah, let's go with him.
TO DIVE ROCK.
Or Arquen. I know everyone hates her because she slew their one true love Lucien Lachance (for shame), but she really pissed me off. I guess it may stem from the fact she's an Altmer, but she's so goddamned smug about everything. Let's feast on her entrails, and stick her head on a plate with an apple in her mouth and display it in my quarters.
Y'know, something about this post makes me think I'm quite psychotic. Wouldn't you say?
