NEW(ish)!! Swords of the Fallen (Fantasy RP Interest/Sign-Up Thread)

[AndrewY]

Name: Andrew Fireheart

Species: Northerner

Gender: Male

Age: 13

Appearance: He is 5'8, has brown eyes, and is somewhat muscular. he has gray hair, a hardy constitution, and he doesn't talk often.

Weapons/Magic Spells: Katana, 243 Hunting Rifle. Magic: Reflective type spells.

Weaknesses: Being a teenager, he is very unpredictable, and very weak in battle against another opponent.

Personality: He has trained himself to get the point across with eye contact, given that he no longer thinks speech is important. He is strong, he can handle a few hits, but after a while he will get tired.

Bio: A disturbed and silent child who dreams of showing the kids at his hometown that he is useful, Andrew Fireheart set out as a childish, immature pedophile, but staying in the town of thieves changed him. He discarded his pedophilia so as to remain ever vigilant. He became very mature for his age, but also very foolhardy. He often throws caution to the wind in battle, and that may one day be the end of him.

After departing from the city of thieves, Andrew found his way to a traveling armorer. He'd won many a fight in the city, and had a small fortune. The armorer was selling weapons. Andrew bought a hunting rifle and left. Thus it began...

 

[Tortilla the Hun]

*snip*

A few concerns here...

One, I think there's a spot of misinformation regarding the age of technology. Guns don't exist as of yet, most certainly not any conventional firearms as we know them.

Two, I'm not really understanding where you're going with the magic here. I'm trying to keep things going with the standard elemental abilities, and I'll clarify if need be.

Three, I'm not sure if this was a misunderstanding of how the kingdom of Sophisma is structured, but it is essentially the combined areas of the homelands of the races in the area.

Finally, there's too little in the sheet in the way of character history. The bio is basically just a skeleton. I'd rather see details then just get the gist of things. However, I'm not saying you need to write a short story, just give me more than what little is there.

Also, just as a couple of side notes, if you wanna improve your chances, I highly recommend you use more than just one-word phrases in the Weaknesses and Personality sections. And Weaknesses doesn't just have to apply to physical ones. Maybe your character has some social or mental vulnerabilities, maybe there's a particular reason why fire affects him more than it does others, traumatic experience perhaps? These are just some ideas.

Now, this may just be me picking nits, but I'd prefer everything to be written in third-person (except dialogue, of course (unless you want your character to speak that way, which I think would be rather interesting and funny)).

And, to keep down the amount of space they take up, I'd prefer character sheets to be posted in spoiler tags, i.e.:

Spoiler: Character X

[Informy bits]

How you go about this is just "spoiler=(name for spoiler)" at the beginning of the sheet and "/spoiler" at the end, only replacing the quotation marks with brackets.

*snip*

I just realized I had overlooked this sheet completely, and I give you my sincerest apologies for having done so.

If you still have any interest on joining, I see no problem in letting your character through.

 

[AndrewY]

It was three in the morning, I had a long day, my creative juices just weren't running. Sorry to disappoint you.

 

[Tortilla the Hun]

It was three in the morning, I had a long day, my creative juices just weren't running. Sorry to disappoint you.

Hey, no need to be so morose about it. Feel free to keep trying.

 

[The_R3d_Fury]

OK sorry I was looking for this thread. Here we go.

Spoiler

Name: Bardax Wolfsbane
Species: Northener
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Appearance: 6?5?, brown hair, blue eyes, athletic build
Weapons/Magic Spells: Longbow, dual scimitars, MAGIC: Can hurl lightning, although doing so requires a great deal of focus. Is hated by wolves ? including lycans.
Weaknesses: Is morally bound to do what is right, even when it isn?t easy, is an outcast and not accepted by many of his own people
Personality: Happy, caring, loving and good.
Bio: When e turned 16, Bardax Wolfsbane found another religion, different from that of his people, and left his tribe after being chased out. He raised himself in the Forrests and harsh, cold Northlands of the realm and as such has a penchant for survival. Having grown lonely over the years, he adopted a pet Eagle who aids him by scouting and showing him where to place his shots.

He practiced his techniques every day in the Forrest and as a result is now a master swordsman.
He set out one day to find adventure and this brings us all up to speed.

 

[Tortilla the Hun]

OK sorry I was looking for this thread. Here we go.

Spoiler

Name: Bardax Wolfsbane
Species: Northener
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Appearance: 6?5?, brown hair, blue eyes, athletic build
Weapons/Magic Spells: Longbow, dual scimitars, MAGIC: Can hurl lightning, although doing so requires a great deal of focus. Is hated by wolves ? including lycans.
Weaknesses: Is morally bound to do what is right, even when it isn?t easy, is an outcast and not accepted by many of his own people
Personality: Happy, caring, loving and good.
Bio: When e turned 16, Bardax Wolfsbane found another religion, different from that of his people, and left his tribe after being chased out. He raised himself in the Forrests and harsh, cold Northlands of the realm and as such has a penchant for survival. Having grown lonely over the years, he adopted a pet Eagle who aids him by scouting and showing him where to place his shots.

He practiced his techniques every day in the Forrest and as a result is now a master swordsman.
He set out one day to find adventure and this brings us all up to speed.

Alright, there's only two things I feel need changing. One, since there are no lycans (in fact, I've yet to even consider including them), so that part can be easily snipped. Secondly, and this one kinda covers two things, but I feel the sheet needs to be meatier. There needs to be more than a paragraph of bio, and I also would like personality to be described in more than just one-word phrases. It's not a bad character, it's just that there's too litle of him.

 

[The_R3d_Fury]

Ok, how's this for the bio?

Spoiler: bio

Bio: Bardax?s father was a hunter who taught him how to use a bow at an early age. He spent his days in the forrests around his villiage hunting and meditating. He took up swordfighitng as a hobby to compete with his friends.

On the night before his 16th birthday he had a dream ? an angel of the Lord of light came to him and spoke with him, warning him against going to the oracle as it would be heresy. He told him to come to the Lord of light. When he woke up father was dead ? murdered in his sleep. He refused to go the Oracle, believing in his dream.

He was accused of murdering his father by his people and was subsequently chased out of his villiage. He took refuge in the forrests in which he grew up, perfecting his sword technique. He worshipped his new-found God in the forrest and hunted, surviving off the techniques his father had taught him. Having grown lonely over the years, he adopted a pet Eagle who aids him by scouting and showing him where to place his shots.

He wandered from town to town trying to find his home, but he could never stay put for too long.

 

[Captain Anon]

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