One liner jokes, anyone?
- Thread starter Virtual_Dom
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My girlfriend always complains that I never take her anywhere new, so I took her to the kitchen.
i was in the park the other day wondering why frisbees get bigger as they get closer, then it hit me
save the whales, collect the whole set!
the police stations toilet was stolen! the cops have nothing to go on
save the whales, collect the whole set!
the police stations toilet was stolen! the cops have nothing to go on
"the england football team" theres a joke for you!
HA! im on the other side of the internet, yooou caaaant kiiill meee
HA! im on the other side of the internet, yooou caaaant kiiill meee
-I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already
-Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
-A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time'
The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'.
-Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners
All from Tommy Cooper. The Master
-Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
-A man walked into the doctor's, The doctor said 'I haven't seen you in a long time'
The man replied, 'I know I've been ill'.
-Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners
All from Tommy Cooper. The Master
Roses are red, violets are blue, I've got a gun get in the van!
In spite of the cost of living it still remains popular.
Scientists have finally developed a car that runs on water. Unfortunately it only works with water from the gulf of mexico (too soon?).
A shoe horn sounds like a thing a foot fetishist might get.
In spite of the cost of living it still remains popular.
Scientists have finally developed a car that runs on water. Unfortunately it only works with water from the gulf of mexico (too soon?).
A shoe horn sounds like a thing a foot fetishist might get.
ninja'd. so...brainfreeze215 said:
my shrink told me i was crazy once. i told him i wanted a second opinion and he said, "well, you're ugly too."
If it's a penny for your thoughts, but you give your two cents; someone is making an extra penny.
-Steve Wright.
-Steve Wright.
-"If you don't go to other peoples funerals, they won't go to yours."
-"My father only hit me once - but he used a Volvo."
-"I tend to sleep in the nude. Which isn't a bad thing except for maybe on those long flights."
-"Real happiness is when you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money."
-"My mother tried to kill me when I was a baby. She denied it. She said she thought the plastic bag would keep me fresh."
-"People always say: 'You're a comedian, tell us a joke.' They don't say: 'You're an MP, tell us a lie."
-"My father only hit me once - but he used a Volvo."
-"I tend to sleep in the nude. Which isn't a bad thing except for maybe on those long flights."
-"Real happiness is when you marry a girl for love and find out later she has money."
-"My mother tried to kill me when I was a baby. She denied it. She said she thought the plastic bag would keep me fresh."
-"People always say: 'You're a comedian, tell us a joke.' They don't say: 'You're an MP, tell us a lie."
