one sentence to save your life.

[theheroofaction]

Alright, so say you're running away from generic bad guys, now you're up against the wall, you have time to say on sentence to save you whether by buying you time, confusing them, distracting them or convincing them not to fight.

So, what is it?

 

[smearyllama]

I throw my sweetroll up in the air to distract them, so that I may get an advantage.

 

[JoJo]

Wait... is that an allosaur behind you?

 

[theheroofaction]

The secret to immortality is...

hopefully this stops them from shooting long enough for me to run

 

[FalloutJack]

"In all the confusion, I forgot how many bombs I set, where I put them, or how long until they go off."

That ought to make them sweat a bit.

 

[Leemaster777]

"If any of you get any closer, I'm gonna throw my shit at you!"

I would then proceed to drop my pants and start shitting right there in the alley. So they know SHIT JUST GOT REAL.

 

[supermariner]

"wait! if you kill me you'll never find the antidote ... to the poison you just drank!"

 

[acillies45]

"Hold on! Hold on!"

And then book it

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

"THE ANTIDOTE WAS POISONED"

 

[Rnr1224]

"If you kill me now, then you will never know where the money is!" lying of course

 

[smearyllama]

"If any of you get any closer, I'm gonna throw my shit at you!"

I would then proceed to drop my pants and start shitting right there in the alley. So they know SHIT JUST GOT REAL.

This response beats anything else in this thread, even my response.

 

[Hero in a half shell]

EDIT: I thought of a better one:

I would turn around, look them in the eyes, and take out my gold pocket watch

I wouldn't even need to say a word. By the time that tune ends, they would be long gone.

 

[emeraldrafael]

I think it was the second sentence of Moby Dick, but its something like 70some words long.

EDIT: or if i was fat enough, I'd do the truffle shuggle.

 

[gabe12301]

OMG LOOK IT"S GABE NEWELL WITH HALF-LIfE THREE!!!!*points at random fat guy, then books it when the run over to inspect*(no offence Gabe but seriously, lay off the KFC.)

 

[Onoto]

"Augh!" Then I'd fall over and pretend I've had a heart attack. Maybe I'd wet myself if I had a full enough bladder.

 

[The Harkinator]

If you kill me now you'll never know the combination, take me to the safe and I can open it for you.

When they turn their backs I'll nick one of their guns and start shooting.

 

[azurine]

"If you kill me now, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!"

 

[Veldel]

Strike me down now and il become stronger then you could ever imgine.

 

[Mr Shrike]

"Has anybody really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?"

As they're trying to riddle it out, I'll make good my escape.