Online Dating

[WolfThomas]

I've a free account on OkCupid which I made out of boredom once. But I barely log into more than once a month and don't really use it.

I don't think online dating is too bad, my mother met her partner who she now lives with on a dating website. I think it's important however to use the thing as a way of getting the first date, rather prolonged internet communication.

Well I met a girl online through a site
she said she was interested in fisting and Heavy Bdsm role play

Do I want to ask who was the fister/fistee in her arrangement?

 

[Priddo]

I wouldn't go on dating sites as such, but I have met a nice girl online I've been dating for around two years now.

 

[The_Echo]

I no longer count my online relationships as legitimate. Firstly, online dating (or long-distance in general) sucks a big one. Secondly, it's just kind of silly, I think.

Third time was the charm, got me off the idea forever.

 

[PeePantz]

One time, I joined the previously mentioned OKCupid in order to help a friend. He needed a little nudge in the dating scene and a dating site seemed like a good idea. The deal was that we would make profiles and then we would double date (creating an awkward dinner for those involved). Not to sound like an ass wipe, but I don't need help dating and only did it to help my best friend.

However, the whole experience got a little addictive in the way you could rate people and see who has viewed your profile. For the most part, it was just good drunken fun.

Then, it got weird where I had to meet some of these girls in order to start some sort of double date with my friend. I wasn't too picky and essentially went out with a few that seemed the most "normal". This was a mistake. First off, I was light years out of their league, which is fine, but then it became a thing of them being extremely insecure (which isn't surprising since they were actively pursuing a relationship via a website). Also, after one evening, it seemed like they wanted to spend their life with me (can't blame 'em).

Also, one of the girls was probably the craziest human beings I have ever met. Trust me, that says A TON.

Overall, I found it to be too weird. It's probably not for me although I can see where it could be great for a lot of people who are willing to make an effort. Today, these websites aren't a badge of failure, but are for people who have very busy schedules. It seems to be perfect for city folk. For instance, two good friends of mine met through that website and they both are smart, fun, attractive, and normal.

 

[My name is Fiction]

"I will eventually, its not that much of an investment."

 

[Trogdor1138]

I tried a little bit of it about a year ago after being incredibly depressed from the girl I was really in love with wasn't going to be with me.

All I really found was a bunch of cliche crap and people that seemed to not really care. They say they want to meet nice guys but they're just bullshitting you. I did meet a person that went on to be a good friend now though. I can't say I recommend it, if you do then be very wary of everything. Especially the ones that turn out to be psychotic (happened to me a couple of times in that brief period). But I know it has worked for quite a few people.

So it didn't work out that way, but then luckily only a few months later I met somebody over Facebook of all places and we've been happily in love for almost 10 months. I didn't need any tick boxes and matchmaking crap to know that she was amazing. I've been the happiest i've ever been and still can't really believe it all happened like that.

I guess what I'm saying is that it's worth waiting until somebody comes along, everybody says that but there's a reason for it. It can't match any amount of flings you have or meaningless sex etc.

 

[ayuri]

haha I have never have been on a dating site and dont plan to, but I do have an interesting one.

Spoiler

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I don't trust the interent enough to rely on it for my love life. Generations of my bloodline haven't needed the interent to succeed and I don't want to be the first!

To the bar! Or...wherever...

 

[The Big Eye]

Judging by the responses so far, I have to ask: why does a long distance/online relationship preclude non-textual communication? It's not hard to set up video chat, or at least a phone call, between two people, and I thought it wouldn't be a hard transition from the whole "Sup-how-are-you-A/S/L" stage of things.

Personally, I've never been in a serious relationship, which is probably because I'm a weird, not-outrageously-attractive person with a fair bit of emotional baggage (probably not an unfamiliar story to some of you guys, at least), and also because I don't connect well with people on a superficial level. Trouble is, I don't give two sh!ts for casual relationships, but you kind of need them if you want something serious, don't you?

Anyway, if I thought online dating would solve any of these problems, I'd totally go for it. But I'm skeptical, and of course there is the whole "distance" thing to worry about. There are some elements of a relationship that just require proximity and yes I do absolutely entirely completely mean sex.

 

[MasterOfWorlds]

haha I have never have been on a dating site and dont plan to, but I do have an interesting one.

Spoiler

You...are an evil person for posting such a thing in my thread. XD

On a more serious note, that's sad. I don't think most people that turn to the web for dating are desperate, although there are those. I think it's more of a time/schedule thing for people that are busy. If you're young and have some free time...well, I guess my thing is that I just don't like the idea of dating sites.

I met my gf online and we've been together for eight months now. It wasn't a dating site though, it was just some game that I accidentally clicked an advertisement of when I was perusing the web one day. It looked cool so I signed up and we met. One thing led to another and now we're in a relationship and her dad hates me. XD

 

[[.redacted]]

I really don't think I would.

Too many unknowns, too much potential for a horrible surprise, and there are easier places to go.

That, and...
Hmm. Yes that's probably the answer to two questions:

I tend to change personalities pretty dramatically depending on who I'm speaking to/around, and I do this subconsciously, so it takes no effort - and isn't really hard to keep up.

The advantage of this is I can chat/'hang out with' pretty much anyone, the disadvantage being I get bored pretty fast.

You can't really do this on the internet, so I suppose I would have to just be me. That's not so good. I'm apathetic, care little for others, and am supremely arrogant. I don't think I'd want a relationship on those terms.

[sub]Well that was an unpleasantly honest answer.[/sub]

 

[cathou]

i have a friend that meet his girlfirend on a dating site. i think it's a great way to make a first contact, but it have to go in real life fast enough. i dont believe in online relationship. In my friend case, they talked through email for 2 or 3 weeks, then decided to go to a couple of dates, and they are together for 5 years now...

 

[Salem_Wolf]

I've done it a few times, the latest time has led me to the woman I'm currently in love and living with. I move half-way across the USA to get to her but it was worth the trip, mostly. The state we live in blows something big but yeah, I would do online dating and HAVE many times. So, I'm all for it. There are obviously a lot of risks and trust issues, but if it works it's amazing.

Fact is, I know a LOT of friends who have done online dating to amazing success, and some not so successful. I don't see it as much different than real-life dating, with the obvious differences aside, there are a lot of similarities.

 

[Slash Dementia]

I met my girlfriend online; we started as friends a little over six years ago. Everything about her suddenly started seeming perfect to me, so I told her how I felt two years ago and we started being in a relationship eight months ago. I didn't want to fall in love, but I did, and now I'll work as hard as I have to to get this relationship to another level (meeting in real life).

I might seem cocky or arrogant, but I do know for sure that I could get a girl in real life pretty easily, but I choose to stay with this girl online because of how strongly I feel for her. I hear her voice almost daily, I see her on the webcam a few times a month, and that's enough for me.

 

[Brutal Peanut]

I met my husband online, through a mutual friends myspace friends list.

I was bored as hell one day and looking through her friends list for old high school friends of ours who I dropped out of contact with.I opened his profile because of his interesting picture (I don't remember what it was) and saw his W.o.W background, I messaged him, "Nice background!" and we chatted on MSN, and checked each others Myspace. I asked my friend about him, and she said he was a really nice guy that she had seen and talked to at a few parties. He was also friends with her boyfriend at the time. So that put me slightly more at ease and made me a bit more comfortable about getting to know him.

We never had any online dates, but we started hanging out since luckily we lived very close to one another, and public outings were do-able. We soon found out that we both loved video games, the same music, and mostly the same movies.

Our relationship grew, we dated, we moved in together, after a few years found that the living situation was do-able and that we genuinely enjoyed each others company, he popped a question, and I said yes, and viola.

Meeting someone through the internet, sure, as long as you are careful.
Such as:
1.) Never meeting entirely alone, choose public places, Starbucks, Barns and Noble, Bowling Alley, restaurants, etc.

2.) Take your own car or have a friend or family member drop you off with a promise to return to pick you up. You don't want to be stuck with an utter creep or hysterical psycho the entire time, getting highly uncomfortable vibes, and then get in their weirdo-mobile and take you home.

3.) And make sure to tell friends or family or trusted individual, where you are going and who with, so they can make sure you return home safely, or they can call to check up on you.

(I know people don't like to reveal to much about dating to friends and family, but really, leaving to meet a strange person, without at least telling someone you are going on a date or stepping out with someone you don't really know, is highly irresponsible. Unless you have no one, then, follow rules 1 and 2, and use your brain.)

But,....

Online dating sites?
and/or
A relationship based entirely around the internet, with no real face-to-face, but proclamations of love?

No.

 

[gustcq]

I think there was a time when if you online dated you kinda be a loser, but nowadays its rpetty common and makes ppl happy i guess!

 

[ayuri]

haha I have never have been on a dating site and dont plan to, but I do have an interesting one.

Spoiler

You...are an evil person for posting such a thing in my thread. XD

On a more serious note, that's sad. I don't think most people that turn to the web for dating are desperate, although there are those. I think it's more of a time/schedule thing for people that are busy. If you're young and have some free time...well, I guess my thing is that I just don't like the idea of dating sites.

I met my gf online and we've been together for eight months now. It wasn't a dating site though, it was just some game that I accidentally clicked an advertisement of when I was perusing the web one day. It looked cool so I signed up and we met. One thing led to another and now we're in a relationship and her dad hates me. XD

I was not putting down his dating profile it was just what he said it was not about personality he wanted to date someone who was Asian and a bonus is if she is a housewife and 16 to 23 (under 18 is underage).

 

[MasterOfWorlds]

I was not putting down his dating profile it was just what he said it was not about personality he wanted to date someone who was Asian and a bonus is if she is a housewife and 16 to 23 (under 18 is underage).

My guess would be that he's about 16-18 and has a totally incorrect perception about the Japanese culture. If he did, he wouldn't have reffered to them as "Nipponese." He's in for a rude awakening. I wish I was there to see it. XD

 

[Kevlar Eater]

Let's see... my mom wanted me to give online dating a chance (no point since most women on dating websites tend to be 35+, used up [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IfYouKnowWhatIMean] and have the scars to prove it, and/or are physically/mentally undesirable. And despite that stuff, there's usually a 15:1 male/female ratio on any of those sites battling for scraps of sexuality left in aforementioned women). And my sister has suggested I try an international dating site (she was even gonna go as far as to make my profile for me, but I talked her out of that), but there's a relatively good chance someone would want me to get access to a green card.

But to the people that do it: all the power to you. I won't judge unless I personally know you.