Ordinary Household Items that double as Epic Weapons!!

[Pm0n3y]

So today, i made one of my usual trips to the kitchen to make a pizza. As i made the preparations for the food, i took out a cookie sheet from one of my various cabinets. As i did so, a crazy thought come to me: This would make be a good melee weapon wouldn't it? Cuz when you think about it:

-It's lightweight (making it easy to use)
-And it's metal (so it could do some type of damage.)

So, i come before you today, my fellow Escapists, with a simple yet intuitive question:

What regular, seemingly impractical household implement would double as a weapon of mass destruction?

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

Tape measures. Seriously. You can use them to strangle people and they have sharp edges.

 

[comadorcrack]

DVD's Ninja Death Discs.

On another note. Deodorant could make a good make shift Dildo in a pinch

 

[the_pleasure_is_mine]

Baseball bat.
Also speakers/computer screens etc, very good for bashing with.

 

[PurpleLeafRave]

A lava lamp. Seriously, I have it on at night cause it helps me get to sleep. If an intruder came into my room and I smashed it over their head...

 

[blackshark121]

360 controllers. Hold one side and the battery pack, and you've got a punching implement,

 

[Amnestic]

DVD's Ninja Death Discs.

On another note. Deodorant could make a good make shift Dildo in a pinch

...

I don't even want to know. Especially considering my deoderant can is in this [http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aWwr8g03OwY/SojgXePpoJI/AAAAAAAAAR8/Xgo5QmsmXeo/s400/lynx_deodorant_body_spray_dark_temptation_11363.jpg] shape.

Any sort of electrical wire/cable could be used to throttle people I suppose.

 

[manaman]

Household item? Like knifes, and forks, or are we talking my house cause I got a shotgun not to far away that would be a pretty decent weapon, I could smash people with the butt of it or something.


Yeah sorry, just trying to point out I find this topic not very well thought out. Are we to exclude normal things in houses that are pretty much legitimate weapons, and just asking about makeshift weapons?

 

[Danpascooch]

The sword hanging on my bedroom wall...it makes a good decoration and... well, its a F--king sword...so yeah, decent weapon.

 

[El Poncho]

Tape measures. Seriously. You can use them to strangle people and they have sharp edges.

You could also ask the enemy to hold one side and measure the battlefield without them knowing you covered most of it in oil, set it alight and let go or attatch a bomb to it.

 

[Jim Grim]

Like, pretty much everything if you hit someone with it or forced it down their throat depending on size and shape.

 

[Danpascooch]

DVD's Ninja Death Discs.

On another note. Deodorant could make a good make shift Dildo in a pinch

...

I don't even want to know. Especially considering my deoderant can is in this [http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aWwr8g03OwY/SojgXePpoJI/AAAAAAAAAR8/Xgo5QmsmXeo/s400/lynx_deodorant_body_spray_dark_temptation_11363.jpg] shape.

Any sort of electrical wire/cable could be used to throttle people I suppose.

How is a "good make shift Dildo" a decent weapon? You must have taken some pretty F--king weird martial arts classes.

 

[orangebandguy]

Tables, never underestimate the thrown table.

 

[Jamiemitsu]

Fire pokers and screwdrivers

 

[LeonLethality]

MY FISTS! they count as household items right?

 

[The Kangaroo]

Well for some reason I have a crowbar in my house so does that count?

I also have a 17 inch knife in my kitchen.

But to go with the less obvious answer than Half Life and the Pint-Sized Slasher, I'd say either a meat chopping board (the ones with the spikes in them to hold the meat) or my sister's hiking trophy (weighs like 3 stone and is shaped like a hiking stick handle)

 

[Kuchinawa212]

Fire pokes for the win, That will will ruin anyone's day if you jammed that into their side

or you know kitchen knives. Those will work

 

[EMFCRACKSHOT]

Tape measures. Seriously. You can use them to strangle people and they have sharp edges.

You could also ask the enemy to hold one side and measure the battlefield without them knowing you covered most of it in oil, set it alight and let go or attatch a bomb to it.

That is brilliant. You sir are a genious.

You could even tie several together and make some kind of flail/whip type thing

 

[paragon1]

I happen to own a very VERY large knife. It works well on watermelons.