Paranoia: Conclusion!
- Thread starter wilsonscrazybed
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CHECK THE FIRST POST!!!mshcherbatskaya post=362.69760.702621 said:
It says we're doing this tomorrow at the same time as last week
I am here now, I overslept. If you are still on I will start late, otherwise same time tomorrow?
Ip: 118.32.84.218
Ip: 118.32.84.218
The first post specified Sun, Aug. 31st. The only ones getting Sunday this time around are the Aussies.wilsonscrazybed post=362.69760.693720 said:
sad day, i missed it 
as I'm reading the post from wilson of how it all went, something strikes me as very odd.... why can we read what everyone is PMing to wilson and whatnot? I just found out that you lit yourself on fire to blame me???? what is this??? lol
as I'm reading the post from wilson of how it all went, something strikes me as very odd.... why can we read what everyone is PMing to wilson and whatnot? I just found out that you lit yourself on fire to blame me???? what is this??? lol
In-joke between me and Wilson. It is as of yet unexplained how and why I was set on fire, and who by. However, I would like to point out that out of everyone in the group, Teafo was the only one to not give SOME form of aid - even Mshcher was trying to help when she poured coffee on me.Teafo post=362.69760.704029 said:
However, if you do find something secret about someone's character (as in, something actually important.) could you refrain from posting it on here? As much as I'd love to know everyone's secret mission, I'm not going to go searching for it, and then publically put it up here because that would RUIN THE BLOODY GAME.
Right then, now that that's out of the way, report times; I told you to expect it to be shit...so don't blame me...oh, it is also pretty long, but a lot happened.
Mr. Awesomesauce Reporter Qayin reporting on the reportings needed to be reported in accordance with his title as a reporter...and being Awesomesauce;
-Before the RP began, Wilson expressed a wish for us to all read his handy tips and 'suggestions'/feedback. We had already read this, of course, but being so nice we read it again.
-Wilson then posts the feedback in the game, despite the fact that we have already read it. Twice.
-Wilson outlines the feedback.
-Wilson restates the feedback...really;
Wilson: so if I ask you "what are you doing" then say 1 thing"
Wilson: and wait till I respond
Wilson: before doing something else
-Before I can burn Wilson's house down, he starts the RP.
-Our valiant heroes / cowardly fools find themselves in a tube station...where Allur has lead them.
-Allur had overdosed on the extra, vomit-covered happy pills. So really we had no reason to follow him. Blind leading the blind, to be frank.
.-Allur hallucinates that I am burning alive...and being tazered...and for the sake of delusion tells himself that he is just imagining Mori in my body, or something, all I know is that it was my body getting the punishment in his head.
-Allur keeps spazzing out, (Yeah, not that P.C., but if you laughed, we're in it together - so see you in Hell), drooling, and hallucinating about chairs, and people on chairs, until AFK and Eye mysteriously dissapear with the sole purpose of avoiding the drugged up fool.
-Oh, we also miss a train, or something, who cares when there's a crazy tramp on the platform.
-Allur needs a hug.
-I give him hugs to the max.
-Allur vomits on my back.
-I hate everything.
-As I only have hundreds of underpants for a change of clothes, I am now forced to go and wash my clothes in a restroom.
-AFK and Eye are in a 'transport', although Wilson refused to tell me what the hell that even MEANS.
-AFK orders Eye to sing a song...and rub her feet (ooh-err). Eye sings something about something, but his song is about nothing that exists, I mean, what the shit are Trees?
-On the subject of shit, I think that around this specific time I was repeatedly fined for swearing...C'mon, exclaiming 'balls' is hardly profanity, I could have meant beach balls, or tennis balls, or golf balls, or crystal balls extracted from the teeth of God, just because it was exclaimed there's no need to assume I meant scrotum balls...ahem.
-Oh, he also rubs her feet, which makes him either a pervert for invading her personal bubble or REALLY good at following orders.
-Eye then commits the worst act of treason imaginable...he commits an act of such abominable treason that he becomes the antithesis of obediance and common courtesy, Eye becomes a monster, putrid and disgusting in the eyes of all...even the commies.
-Eye Rick Rolls the Transport.
-The Transport driver stops.
-The Transport driver executes Eye.
-Eye deserves this.
-Thoroughly.
-Seriously, fucking Rick Astley.
-Never Gonna Give You Up, right in the transport.
-I loll'ed a bit, and burped...'twas fun.
-Don't get me wrong, a load of stuff happened after this, but I don't really know if that needs covering.
-There's not really a lot that can top that, in terms of treason. Oh, SORRY, I guess I forgot what Mshcher did later, so no, I take that back, there is worse treason.
-...
-Oh, yeah, reporting.
-I've actually forgotten where I was.
-Right, I was in the restroom, whilst a overdosed Allur was crawling along the platform, presumably still being sick, until the train arrives, which he crawls on, screaming at me, despite the fact that I'm not there.
-I miss the train.
-Quite typical really.
-They only come once an hour ya know.
-Oh, Eye was dead, by the way.
-But he's alive now.
-Clones and all that.
-So to recap; AFK is in a transport, presumably defiling Eye-1's corpse on her way to the VAN sector.
-Eye-2 spawns in the VAN sector.
-Allur is taking a tube to the VAN sector.
-I'm not in the VAN sector, because I was surrounded by tards, to be frank.
-Oh? Didn't I mention the VAN sector? Yeah, I remembered that. Me. All by my lonesome. AFTER AFK and Eye left.
-I know, how conveniant that all transports and tubes seem to go to the VAN sector automatically.
-They had no clue where they were going.
-Bit annoying, really, the only person who knows where he is going is stuck with wet clothes, all alone on a tube platform.
-...I'm so lonely.
-So, the filthy deserters have somehow managed to get to a place they didn't know existed, and therefore they all meet up in this VAN sector (apparently the transports drop off at the tube platform there, right next to the clone-respawn area, I guess).
-Eye asks a guard...something, I dunno, I wasn't really listening here, I think he wanted to know where robots get repaired.
-The guard keeps nearly saying comrade, instead of citizen.
-This automatically makes him a communist, clearly, and with their incredible logic and forethought the noobs get themselves into a fight with these armed enforces of the law.
-Allur, with his tactical expertise, throws his pistol at a guard.
-Yeah, I guess the drugs hadn't worn off.
-Eye shoots, AFK shoots, no one is nice to each other, no one is happy, all because these guys said comrade.
-Oh, yeah, that's right, no other evidence, as no one knows anything about Commies, we just know they're bad.
-If you think about it, it was entirely pointless to even mention communists to the guards - that would annoy anyone.
-So, the idiots keep shooting at the armed enforces of the law.
-Eye misses completely. Chump.
-AFK takes someone's arm off. Traitor.
-The guard Allur threw his pistol at, just looks bemused and puts a laser bolt through Allur's chest.
-I arrive by train.
-I see a fight between my team and guards; whoever I shoot, I'm committing treason.
-So, being such a clever chap, I of course just stay quiet and do nothing...
-Alright, I said one thing;
JAY-R-EFK-2: Oh...there appears to be a fight going on between two groups of people I have never met before!
-But that isn't exactly treason is it?
-It isn't as if I SHOT ANY GUARDS!
-Oh, right, the fight;
-AFK shoots another in the head. Seriously, wtf mate? She's still killing enforcers of the law. It gets worse, ya know.
-Eye deploys a jackobot...jackiebot? Whatever, people started spelling it differently, I don't even know what it does.
-AFK misses, shoots an arm off the jackobot.
-I offer a spare pistol to anyone who needs it; again, this isn't really treason, either way I would have been aiding the right team.
-No one wants my pistol.
-Why did no one want to caress my gun?
-Have I mentioned how lonely I am?
-Last guard shoots, Eye takes a shot, only damages his armour; still makes a nice, smoking hole though...take that guard-killer!
-Divine (Allurbase) left...quite frankly, this is a little unacceptable; we spent ages deliberating what to do with his barely living body, he could have at least BEEN there.
-No reason, either, just gone. poof. bye-bye Divine.
-I don't want to go on, and on, and on about this, but if you're out there Divine, we hate you.
-Really, we had a party when you left.
-Your corpse was the pinata.
-AFK kills the last guard.
-She puts ANOTHER shot in that guards corpse.
-At least, she tries to, as this bolt misses and takes another arm off of the Jackobot...lulz.
-Right, post battle arguments...I can see this happening a lot, I may make a jingle...
-*plays the FF7 end-battle tune* No, No, that's overdone.
-MMM it's the post battle bicker, the post battle snicker...shit, that's already awful.
-If anyone has a post-battle argument jingle, do PM me.
-Right, in this post battle argument, AFK basically rags on me for offering my gun to BOTH sides.
-However, this is completely justifiable, as no one could prove they were commies, as we don't actually know what commies do or look like.
-They may be Korean.
-I don't wanna point the finger, but Wilson happens to live in Korea.
-Just something to think about.
-Anyways, I offered a gun to both sides, when really I should have ONLY helped the guards, as they are the law enforcers. So, when you look at it, I was actually being nice.
-AFK didn't think this, though, and just KEPT, ON, GOING, ON!
-I caught a glimpse of what marriage might be like. I shuddered.
-Right, 5 minutes later, AFK calls me names, which hurt, and the matter ends about communists for now.
-Yes, they said comrade, YES, they had hats with hammer and sickles on, but that could have just been a kind of union between smithies and farmers, perhaps some kind of political union that focused on benefiting the working class, but inevitably corrupted the leader, perhaps involving paranoid purges, and a 5-Year Plan...that doesn't mean it has anything to do with communism however.
-Okay, so their hats weren't regulation, but AFK and Eye killed a load of guards, between the two they came off a lot worse in terms of treason.
-However, the VAN sector has no terminal, and therefore the Computer has no presence, meaning the matter goes unresolved.
-There is a note in one of the guard's hands.
-AFK and Eye both try to grab the same not.
-Eye gets there first.
-AFK orders Eye to give her the note.
-This is wrong. Allur is the leader, and we hadn't even checked if he was alive or not.
-AFK reads the note;
Wilson: it reads: Dear citizen, My programming will not allow me to convey the feelings of happieness when you are in my immediate location. Therefore I have decided to terminate you.
Wilson: your's, ted.
-Now, before we go on...Wilson, you rock. Really, I mean, I THINK I get the Ted reference [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Bundy] and even if you didn't do this deliberately, it still makes you very funny.
-Incidentally an application on facebook told me that out of a selection of serial killers I am most like Ted Bundy.
-Yeah, I only just got on Facebook...it isn't as shite as I imagined it to be.
-Don't judge me.
-Yes, I care more about being judged for Facebook than the Ted Bundy thing.
-AFK and Eye, after blaming me for aiding a murderer, then realise that the time and date on the back of the letter means that the meeting hasn't even sodding happened yet, and that this guard may not even BE Ted.
-I point out that this letter may be evidence of a crime, or evidence of intent.
-AFK calls me MORE names, about being a lawyer-er-er.
-I cry a bit, then get back to the game.
-I FINALLY convince these two to see if Allur is alive.
-He is. HA! That means he is the leader, and AFK is not allowed to take leadership, which is so clearly her secret super mission of evil.
-She argues this...quite rightly, to be honest, I was pulling facts out of my arse.
-She assesses that he has a faint pulse, but there is no visible mental activity - his pupils are dialated, his eyes glassy, no sign of intelligence. Although...you know...there wasn't really much activity in that head in the first place.
-I demand Allur be taken to a hospital.
-Eye comes up with the fucking genius idea that we just shoot Allur dead, so that he can come back as a clone.
-I then tell him that this is classified as REDRUM, euthanasia is still treason.
-In the middle of us arguing about this, AFK puts a bolt in Allur.
-WHAT
-THE
-FUCK?!
-Allur dies, I vow revenge once I get proof of this occurence and give it to the Computer, but for the meantime we decide to pursue this matter of Ted.
-That goes beyond treason.
-I mean, what the fuck, orly, awmagawsh and OMFG. It's just putting a shot into your leader, that is serious treason, this is serious game.
-Game ends, for now.
-I'm so avenging Allur's death.
-I probably got a few events mixed up in chronology, but who cares, it isn't as if this has ANY credibility, what with my monumental bias.
-I'm awesome.
This was Mr. Awesomesauce Super Cool Massive Penis Reporter Qayin, reporting the reportings that needed to be reported because you demanded there be a report to be reported on.
So apparently only Wilson noticed I left during the train shoot out incident?
Sorry people. I was indirectly getting kicked off the computer and either way I believe I would have left sooner or later. I felt totally uninspired, blanked out and not funny. All the funniness I could have given to this only came to me the next day.
Sorry people. I was indirectly getting kicked off the computer and either way I believe I would have left sooner or later. I felt totally uninspired, blanked out and not funny. All the funniness I could have given to this only came to me the next day.
No, we all noticed, you just made things hard beyond reason for us.Divinegon post=362.69760.705411 said:
He'd taken a laser round to the chest...how did he make things hard for us? It isn't as if we missed his death soliloquy. We didn't miss out on the dying thoughts of a soldier, long tormented and tested by life, giving his account of his triumph over trials and tribulations, an epic tale of one man and his gun.
Oh, and Divine, I thought the drugged-up stuff was pretty damn funny.
If anyone made anything difficult, I would say it was you, Spartan - automatically taking orders from Mshcher like that, making things VERY difficult for me when it came to seeing if Divine was even alive anymore.
You and your auto-compliance!
Oh, and Divine, I thought the drugged-up stuff was pretty damn funny.
If anyone made anything difficult, I would say it was you, Spartan - automatically taking orders from Mshcher like that, making things VERY difficult for me when it came to seeing if Divine was even alive anymore.
You and your auto-compliance!
I was just trying not to get shot or imprisoned, and yes divine did make things tough for us, we argued for a long while over what to do with the body.
It's alright though, we all get kicked off the computer every now and then.
It's alright though, we all get kicked off the computer every now and then.
I thought you were funny, Divine. Qayin, on the other hand is a perniciously argumentative little twerp with a taste for martyrdom, clearly indicated by his nom de game. *puts Qayin in a headlock, noogies him without mercy* As for my treasonous acts, I was simply trying to free us of our attachment to a leader who was clearly in a persistant vegetative state, so we could quit arguing and play the game.
Spartan gives an excellent foot massage, by the way, and Qayin is clearly suffering from a case on minion-envy.
Spartan gives an excellent foot massage, by the way, and Qayin is clearly suffering from a case on minion-envy.
...why must everyone wish suffering upon poor ickle Qayin?
When I am Lord and Emporer of New Europe (which, oddly enough, will encompass everything other than North New New Zealand) your deaths shall be slow and humiliating.
Yes! Let's see how you fare in a fight to the death with...the rather camp yoghurt monster!
When I am Lord and Emporer of New Europe (which, oddly enough, will encompass everything other than North New New Zealand) your deaths shall be slow and humiliating.
Yes! Let's see how you fare in a fight to the death with...the rather camp yoghurt monster!