Paranormal Activity (Its like the blair witch project but a hell of alot less scary and more boring)

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Piecewise

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Apr 18, 2008
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Ok so...yeah...

Honestly I don't know what to say about this movie. First off, it does not live up to the hype in even the slightest way. 90% of it is boring and slow; not the "calm before the storm" kind of dramatic tension, but the "man I hope the scary bits start soon" kinda slow. To be honest I'm not sure the "scary bits" ever started. Yeah there were a few nice effects and a few jump moments but you could generally see them coming from a mile away. You knew that whenever the couple was in bed something would thump or screech or etc.

Ok so rather then ramble I'm going to tell you what the movie did right and what it did wrong, starting with the wrong. First off, they utterly fail to make it seem as though the events are actually happening to a real couple and are actually taped with a home tape recorder. The quality of the film seems to meander between Film quality clearness to Blair witch grainy, there's the occasional impossible shot or obvious second camera and the acting is pretty meh. The characters rarely seem to emote and aren't to sympathetic, mostly because they're both idiots. Now, I know this is common, horror movie retardation syndrome and all, but these two, especially the boyfriend, are so stupid they pull you right out of the suspension of disbelief. It was about the point when the boyfriend was actually issuing verbal challenges to the ghost/demon that I just wrote him off as an over talkative, mobile desk toy with a death wish. Through out the movie he seems to do everything possible to cause problems, bouncing between fundamentalist sceptic and macho idiot. The girl on the other hand seems to switch between passive whiner to full on screaming, but at least it seems to happen when it would be rational for it to happen.

Now we head to the effects. I didn't expect it to be too great, being a lower budget movie and all, but to be honest the effects are barely present. There's a grand total of maybe a dozen special effect shots; though the few that there were, were well done. One thing that makes very little sense though it the foot print scene, where they capture the demon's foot prints in baby powder. We are show that not only do the foot prints show up, but apparently the demon is also an invisible pterodactyl (judging by the 3 toed prints). Also, the ending was...well it was disappointing as hell. In fact, they show it in the trailer. You know that scene where the guy flies backward at the camera? Thats pretty much it.

Now, on to what it does good. Well...it doesn't try to overtly explain anything, which is a death knell of horror. It also doesn't ever actually show you what the demon looks like, though that might be more out of budget constraints then actual subtlety. It does have a few genuinely creepy and suspenseful moments, though they tend to be repeated and hence lose a great deal of impact. And..well, thats about it. Its just otherwise generic to bad.

Ok so I have to talk about the end here, so Spoilers to anyone still cares.

In the end, the girl is basically possessed by the demon and is show to get out of bed, stand over the guy for a few hours before walking off camera. We then hear her scream and he runs out after her, only to result in silence for several moments. Finally his body goes hurtling back into the room, followed by the girl, with blood on her shirt. She then slowly walks over to the camera and after a smile does the whole "evil face eat camera" move. Now, this bugs me for a LOT of reasons. The first is the fact that it's maddeningly cliche; the actual whole lead up there was somewhat creepy, so ending in such a generic way was a terrible let down. Simply smiling and walking away would have been better, not to mention the loads of other things you could have done; having her slit her throat for instance. They had this perfect chance to really fuck with us and they copped out with a jump scare. And thats a problem with the whole movie; it all seems to be leading to something terrifying, but once it get's there its pretty much just a loud noise or something similar.

Over all, it seems like a screamer that tells you it's a screamer, it warns you the scare is coming and then it sort of burps and expects you to be afraid. Oh and yeah, the ghost actually does burp at one point. Terrifying isn't it?

2/5 and thats only because the idea is relatively neat.
 

Grassassassin

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Jun 21, 2009
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Good review, you just saved me $12.00.
I was hoping it would be good, I was hearing great things but I guess it's another let down in the "modern" horror genre.
 

Piecewise

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Apr 18, 2008
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Maybe it was the hype that makes it seem so meh, maybe its the fact that I've seen alot of horror films, or maybe its the fact that you're in a theater with a bunch of people, but it's completely non-scary. In fact, the stupid part is that the critics are all saying that you should see it in theaters, when it would be MUCH more effective in a house, alone, with the lights off. Because it would be much more disquieting simply because it's taking place in an ordinary home, just like yours.

I must admit that a few parts are good, but they're just too rare and ruined by everything else.
 

Chancie

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Sep 23, 2009
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You really hit most of it on the head. It wasn't a fantastic movie (though I personally didn't think it was flat-out terrible either) but I was definitely disappointed by it.

There were no parts that I was terrified because of and the parts that could have been that way, were in the trailer so I knew what it was anyways.
 

whycantibelinus

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Sep 29, 2009
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I thought the movie was well done personally, and it did sort of creep me out when I was going to sleep that night in my house all by myself. :-(
 

bcponpcp27

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saintchristopher said:
You're all stimulus-addicted children who have no idea what you're talking about.
This is extremely true. None of your have any appreciation for good pacing and suspense. You have been addicted to the notion that horror movies are fast paced gore sprees. I am saddened that this revival of Hitchcockian horror was poorly received by some.
 

Cilliandrew

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Jul 10, 2009
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I'm still waiting for this movie to come to my area. It's been in the top 5 American Box Office for 2 weeks, yet still no Windsor, Ontario release!
 

GloatingSwine

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Nov 10, 2007
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Less scary and more boring than Blair Witch? That's a hell of an achievement. The only fun to be had with Blair Witch was dreaming up the kind of gruesome fates that it's idiot protagonists would have met by now in a halfway decent horror movie.
 

Cilliandrew

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Jul 10, 2009
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GloatingSwine said:
Less scary and more boring than Blair Witch? That's a hell of an achievement. The only fun to be had with Blair Witch was dreaming up the kind of gruesome fates that it's idiot protagonists would have met by now in a halfway decent horror movie.
I find BWP to be one of those movies that is a real good indicator of a person's character...Whether you enjoy the movie or no really all depends on what you as an individual actually finds scary.

The BWP was all about the unseen being scarier then the seen. It leaves alot to the viewer's imagination.. I love that style of horror.. It was all build-up and atmosphere and then in the final half hour the stuff hits the fan.

It's 1 of 2 films (the other being "Deliverance") that ever actually affected me psychologically...
 

ProfessorLayton

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Nov 6, 2008
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DAVEoftheDEAD said:
Paranormal Activity is the scariest movie I've ever seen! Drag Me To Hell was really good too.
But if you didn't like it plz give me a list of whats scarier?
You thought Drag me to Hell was good?

Fatal Frame 2 for PS2. You obviously haven't seen many scary movies...
 

Ravenbom

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Oct 24, 2008
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bcponpcp27 said:
saintchristopher said:
You're all stimulus-addicted children who have no idea what you're talking about.
This is extremely true. None of your have any appreciation for good pacing and suspense. You have been addicted to the notion that horror movies are fast paced gore sprees. I am saddened that this revival of Hitchcockian horror was poorly received by some.

Agreed on both counts.
Anyways, I thought it was good and scary. It was refreshing not to have a more than one screen of title and ending credits.
And I also admire it for being shot on something like a $11,000 budget.
I don't think I would like it if I saw it again, but I thought it was good and freaky and a hell of a lot of fun at the midnight screening I went to.
But don't watch the trailer online. If you do that beforehand, it will literally ruin the movie and show you everything that you're tensely waiting for if you watch it and know nothing about it.

Also, unlike Cloverfield the movie doesn't shake the camera deliberately, and half the movie is on a tripod, so it makes the movie more watchable.
 

GloatingSwine

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Cilliandrew said:
The BWP was all about the unseen being scarier then the seen. It leaves alot to the viewer's imagination.. I love that style of horror.. It was all build-up and atmosphere and then in the final half hour the stuff hits the fan.
A great deal of horror films rely on the scariness of the things you don't see, usually because they have no special effects budget.

They manage to do so without being unutterably dull.
 

RebelRising

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Jan 5, 2008
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Well, by the sound of it, it doesn't look like it's as good as people are saying. The way that ending sounds really turns me off.

I still think the creepiest, scariest movies are the following:

Rosemary's Baby

Exorcist III

Carnival of Souls

Anyways, very good review; I won't chastise you on the spoilers, as you announced them, and I myself am wont to do the same with spoilers. You communicated the main points of your argument against the movie clearly and concisely, though the formatting makes it seem a bit cluttered. I would recommend putting in pictures to make it a bit more readable (extra points for funny captions!).

All in all, a pretty good review. You don't beat around the bush, instead getting straight into the actual reviewing (something I haven't gotten the hang of). Keep it up!
 

Canadamus Prime

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Jun 17, 2009
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Yeah it's a great review of a movie I've never heard of.
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...and for the record the Blare Which Project wasn't scary, at least the parts of it I saw between running to the bathroom because all the jerky camera movement made me nauseous and I thought I was going the throw up.