Parents Fight To Use Dead Son?s Sperm To Create Posthumous Grandchild

[DanDeFool]

This lends credence to the perspective of evolutionary biology on the meaning of life. That is to say, the only purpose we have in life is to leave behind copies of our genes. All of our emotions, unconscious desires, drives, and effort is all to accomplish that one goal.

It's sad to think that way, and I'm probably being disrespectful by casting the desire of these parents to preserve the memory of their son in such a light. Still, I think we can agree that the parent's desire to reproduce using their son's sperm is certainly not logical, and it's probably not what most of us would consider an emotionally or spiritually healthy way to cope with this tragedy. It's got to be an expression of something more basic.

And the 'right to grandparenthood' frightens me to no end. Would that mean that my parents could force me to conceive a child by some means, simply because I, as the carrier of their genes, am technically a surrogate reproductive appendage of theirs? Crazy. But, again, it fits into the paradigm of evolutionary biology.

Man, no wonder nobody wants to agree with Darwin.

 

[Woodsey]

" "If we were entitled to donate the organs of our son why are we not entitled to make use of his sperm in order to bring offspring to the world?""

I dunno, dozens of moral complications and pressures placed on the child that you are evidently creating out of selfishness perhaps? So, you know, completely different from simply donating an organ.

Yes, its tragic, but that doesn't give you the right to simply replace him with a child, especially when you're probably pushing the age of being able to be the best you can for it. They're not asking for a grandchild, they're asking for a child.

 

[shadyh8er]

Do you mind if I link this story to the "squick" page on TVTropes? This has to be some form of necrophilia, I swear!

 

[mobsterlobster]

Yeah it's unorthodox, I don't see how it's creepy. I'm pretty sure I read about a woman who lost her husband so had his sperm extracted so she could give birth to his child.

 

[Clobersaurus15]

It's a touch unusual, but as long as the parents can find a willing participant and bring the child up properly (i.e tell them who their father was etc) then I see no problem. Surely on a basic level the continuation of the family's genes and the creation of life from death (in a manner of speaking) can only benefit humanity as a whole.

 

[MightyMole]

How was this sperm extracted again, exactly....?

On a more serious note, they do ask the donor to donate organs or sperm. They can't ask him if it's alright to use his sperm, thus I believe their argument is flawed in that sense. I see where they are coming from though, I imagine they really wanted their son to grow up and have grandkids they'd have visit them and allow them to see the next generation grow up, possibly for the last time before they passed, and it really is tragic that they won't experience that and my deepest sympathies do go out to them for it, but it really isn't right I don't think... I mean do they already have a woman picked out? And who would raise the child?

On the other hand, I imagine their son probably doesn't care. He's dead :/

In some countries it isn't necessary to give permission yourself, parents can decide on it, on the organ part that is.
From wikipedia: The laws of different countries allow potential donors to permit or refuse donation, or give this choice to relatives.

Maybe the keyword is anonymity, sperm/organ donation is anonymous, in this case it isn't.

My mistake, merely speaking from my experience. If Israel practices this, then I see no problem.

 

[Madara XIII]

Who is going to raise the child, and, when he's older, he's gonna find out about this. I mean, its online. He'll probably be covered in the news. It isn't like they'll be able to hide the fact that he was conceived after his[her] father's death.

Think of how he would feel knowing that.

THIS! Honestly how will the kid feel when he grow's up knowing that he's literally the son of a dead man? Seems a bit weird, but honestly the emotional impact it could have on a kid.

Secondly, I know I shouldn't judge, but doesn't it seem a bit selfish that the parents are urging for grandkids even after the son is dead? I know they're probably stricken by his death, but it seems like a lot of pressure to put on someone.

"Well here ya go, you're now pregnant with our dead son"

I mean...it's just weird. The whole consenting mother thing is going to definitely be a problem.

A grandkid isn't going to bring him back and whatever memories they're hoping to revive within him won't do them any good as well.

I'm sorry people but this is a job for the WTF LLAMA:

 

[Ubermetalhed]

This sounds like something that would be in the sequel to Takashi Miike's Visitor Q.

So yeh, it sounds pretty messed up to me.

 

[Lilani]

I think this is rather selfish on their part. I mean, if their son was 27, then they have to be at least in their late 40s or 50s, if not their 60s. Even if that child were born this very day, they would be in their 70s before they're even a teenager. They're already up there in years, so it would be very difficult to keep up with a youngster, not to mention an active child. Sure, they might raise him while they're still around for these next few years, but after that he'll have no one.

They'd be raising a child knowing full well that he won't have parents or grandparents in his young adulthood. And he'd have to start taking care of them before he's even out of school. It's just so selfish. They're doing it all for their happiness. They aren't even thinking about the child's happiness.

 

[theNater]

i think that's a consent issue

which he can't give

because he's dead

In medical matters, when a person is unable to give consent, consent transfers to their legally appointed representative. If the person has not actively chosen such a representative, the default is usually next of kin.

If the parents have the authority to determine what happens to the organs, it would be consistent for them to have the authority to determine what happens to the sperm.

 

[Madara XIII]

Do you mind if I link this story to the "squick" page on TVTropes? This has to be some form of necrophilia, I swear!

LOL I was thinking the same thing man XD. I mean they're going to impregnate a woman with a dead man's sperm......KINKY!

OR

 

[Scorched_Cascade]

So yeah what do you think? Do parents have any saying on their children's fertility? Should they be allowed to go through with this and get a grandson?

This is...I'm not sure. Normally I would say whatever they want to get up to is fine as long as it doesn't affect anyone else but this concerns the lives of two others. Their son and his potential progeny. I....don't know what to think.

Welcome to the Escapist. Pay no attention to those scaremongers, the basement is full of hope and light and candy and those shiny things you like.

Just watch out for Candlejack. He lives in the bas

Didn't we tell you not to talk about Candlejack!? Now he's gonna come here and get everyo

Candlejack doesn't live in th

No! Why did you mention Candlejack now he

 

[Lucie]

There's something twisted about intentionally bringing a child into the world without parents.

There's also something twisted about using someone's sperm to create a child without their knowledge.

Well about that: the article states that in Israel it is already possible for a dead man's wife or partner to gain access to his sperm as long as he didn't leave explicit instructions to the contrary. But the ministry refused to allow a man's mother or father similar access, concluding that parents have no legal standing regarding their children's fertility, "not in their lifetime, and certainly not when they are dead."

So creating a child without someone's knowledge, or better yet consent, is already possible :/

 

[Griffolion]

If they are in Israel, I'm going to guess they are most likely Jewish. It means a lot to Jews for their family line to be continued, it's a legacy thing, so I guess I can see why they are doing it.

It's really sad in the end, I guess those two wanted nothing more than grand children to love and pass their wisdom onto. I'd feel pretty rubbish and desperate if I was in their situation.

Still, there's the welfare of the child to consider, especially when those two people will most likely be very old at an unusual age for the child. So i'd probably not let them. However if a woman accepts the sperm like they would at a sperm bank and raises that child herself with the grand parents playing a traditional role then that would be different as it would be more 'normal' for the child.

 

[Madara XIII]

There's something twisted about intentionally bringing a child into the world without parents.

There's also something twisted about using someone's sperm to create a child without their knowledge.

Well about that: the article states that in Israel it is already possible for a dead man's wife or partner to gain access to his sperm as long as he didn't leave explicit instructions to the contrary. But the ministry refused to allow a man's mother or father similar access, concluding that parents have no legal standing regarding their children's fertility, "not in their lifetime, and certainly not when they are dead."

So creating a child without someone's knowledge, or better yet consent, is already possible :/

Great now I gotta write out a long winded ass specific Will so as to make sure this crap doesn't happen. Thank you for adding this to my list of what I don't want to happen to me when I'm dead.

 

[Uber Waddles]

I cant judge either, as I never lost a child.

But I think bringing a being into existance, without a father, is just wrong. Now, dont get me wrong. Im not saying if you got pregnant, husband dies 2 months in, that you should get an abortion. But he's dead, and they want to generate an offspring.

How do they even know the donor would let them keep in contact with the child? A woman could easily agree to do so, than raise the kid as her own.

I get why their doing this, but I find it a bit disrespectful.

 

[Ajna]

i think that's a consent issue

I agree with this. If the kid gave consent ahead of time, sure, I guess. But I doubt he did. It's similar to those stories you hear about people having sex with their husband's/wive's who happen to be in a coma. It's okay, albeit unusual... But they still need to have consent from before-hand.

I don't see a problem with it. Also, that is a....unique first post. Welcome to the Escapist! Just watch out for Candlejack. He lives in the bas

Candlejack doesn't live in th

I'd rather take on Candlejack than a sni

 

[theNater]

THIS! Honestly how will the kid feel when he grow's up knowing that he's literally the son of a dead man? Seems a bit weird, but honestly the emotional impact it could have on a kid.

You realize that a child who was conceived shortly before the father's death would also grow up "knowing that he's literally the son of a dead man", right?

The impact on the child is not likely to be significantly different than the impact of losing a father post-conception, unless, y'know, other people go out of their way to make it weird.

 

[Dastardly]

Somehow this just doesn't seem right to me. I have never lost a child so maybe I'm unfit to judge. I could imagine that you are devastated and heartbroken, but a grandchild isn't going to bring him back.
Also on the quote: "If we were entitled to donate the organs of our son why are we not entitled to make use of his sperm in order to bring offspring to the world?". I don't feel that they are the same thing, I mean organ donation is for saving lives, not creating them.

So yeah what do you think? Do parents have any saying on their children's fertility? Should they be allowed to go through with this and get a grandson?

Looking at it from the point-of-view of the culture might shed some light. In Israel, there's a high likelihood they're a Jewish family. Historically, they've put a lot of emphasis on lineage (see their scriptures). It's important for them--it's a continuation of the family name and the spirit of their son. In other cultures, it's not as big a deal, but to them it may well mean the world.

But I also disagree on the organ donor thing. The point they're making is that the law allows medicine to take the organs when it serves their purposes... but for some reason doesn't allow this non-destructive procedure? Additionally, they allow sperm donation and the creation of embryos from collected sperm... but not this? They're pointing out an internal inconsistency with the position being taken, and I think that's fair. It doesn't prove them right, it proves that it's worth discussing.