Pick a useless super power

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Olas

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Dec 24, 2011
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To use a movie reference, the ability to turn invisible when nobody is looking.
 

WanderingFool

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Apr 9, 2009
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I would have the power to seE WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DONE BEFORE!

AND I WOULD BE CALLED CAPTIAN HINDSIGHT!

For my first use of my new found power, I will see that South Park already came up with that...
 

s0p0g

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Aug 24, 2009
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the ability to remember every captcha i ever answered, do answer and will answer
captcha agrees and says: seems legit xD
 

Mr.Squishy

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Apr 14, 2009
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The ability to kind of 'hitch a ride' via possession - experiencing what the host does, but with no control over their body. It would be interesting to use, but not really all that practical.
 

baconsarnie

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Jan 8, 2011
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chozo_hybrid said:
Being able to grow a beard in seconds by concentrating, then I could make fake beards out of them and start selling them.
I would love that, just to mess with people, also having a beard gives you a distinct advantage over others.
 

Frission

Until I get thrown out.
May 16, 2011
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s0p0g said:
the ability to remember every captcha i ever answered, do answer and will answer
captcha agrees and says: seems legit xD
That post is from April 2nd... how did you do that?

I would like the ability to fly up to two inches above the ground.
 

cahtush

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Jul 7, 2010
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The ability to cure smallpox.
Utterly useless and made even worse by the fact that some time ago it would have been the most awesome-est thing ever.
 

Longstreet

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Jun 16, 2012
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Not being able to get a nose bleed ever again no matter what.

Useless, but i get so many bloody noses it would save me soooooo much trouble.
 

cjspyres

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Oct 12, 2011
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The ability to implode at any moment by force of sheer will. It would result in my death, but the the faces of everyone around me would be worth it.
 

BrotherRool

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Oct 31, 2008
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The ability to see in ultra-violet! I've always wanted to write a story about a man drunk in bar at midday, talking about how when he was a child a freak accident involving cosmic radiation, a lightning bolt and a clown car gave him the ability to see in ultra-violet. He got a superiority complex about it and tried to lord it over people, but when he took advantage of it he realised there was nothing he could do. Well he could read those secret messages 6 year old girls write, without the special pen, but that wasn't particularly helpful as far as crime-fighting went. His pride got him into trouble and he started picking fights and turning to drinking before crashing out.

Then the girl he's telling the story too, asks him to come outside and take a walk through the meadows with her. She sits him down next to some flowers and traces the delicate ultra-violet patterns in the petals.

'I can see in ultra-violet too'

-END-



Or else, the power to stop time, but it affects you the same. No-one will ever know.
 

Evil Smurf

Admin of Catoholics Anonymous
Nov 11, 2011
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The power of having a burnt face.
http://fat-pie.com/burntfaceman/burntfacemanhead.png

Although that could get me hefty government welfare money.....
 

Auron225

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Oct 26, 2009
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Theme music playing in my head sounds awesome! =D

Aside from that... super speed, but no super fast reflexes or fast thinking or fast healing. I can move at the speed of sound, but whenever I try to I almost kill myself every time 0.0
 

Redingold

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Mar 28, 2009
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I got a real corker in the most recent superpowers thread, which was the ability to sense the emotions of horses. I cannot conceive of a productive use of that power.
 

Heronblade

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Apr 12, 2011
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Mr.Squishy said:
The ability to kind of 'hitch a ride' via possession - experiencing what the host does, but with no control over their body. It would be interesting to use, but not really all that practical.
Uh, you could be the world's best spy with that one, especially if you could hear the host's thoughts.

OT: The ability to cause a book/movie/tv episode/game I have already experienced before to run the way I think it should have. But the change is not permanent, reverting to its original form shortly after it leaves my presence. Not of much practical use except as a party trick, but it does mean for me, no more midichlorians, weak ME endings, or huge chunks of plot critical storyline ripped out for convenience.
 

AlbertoDeSanta

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Sep 19, 2012
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I'll go with Op's first suggestion: The Ability to selectively remove memories relating to a certain thing. Helps make you forget the sad times and allows you to have more good times.
 

Quaxar

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Sep 21, 2009
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Seeing cleanly through glass walls even if they're really dirty. Mainly because I hate it when my glasses have dust on them.
 

InvaderTim

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Dec 9, 2012
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The ability to summon a lamp, but only once,
The ability to morph into a brick, but you're a brick now and as a result cannot morph back,
the power of photosynthesis,
only your left half has super speed,
the ability to read your own mind....

I'll be back with more
 

Fluffythepoo

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Sep 29, 2011
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The ability to wash and dry clothes faster than a washing machine/drier. I am.. THE HUMAN LAUNDROMAT!