Poll: Another Relationship Question (without sex)

[hyperhammy]

I dont understand, but I am inclined to say no

if you were both in love then you DID have something. if you dont want a serious relationship then why would you? hell, why would you stay with her? or resume contact?


did you just use the word closure to refer to this situation?

Yes, closure, because I really loved her and I was heartbroken when I had to leave.

Spoiler: *sigh*

You realise that if you "get it on" with her, you're going to feel like absolute shit when you leave, right?

Lusting over this woman, then leaving, was hard enough.

Now put sex in the equation and, BAMN, you don't want to leave.

I said it and I will say it again: NO SEX

I just don't want to feel like there could have been something. Like I did the last couple of years.

 

[hyperhammy]

You just want to fuck her?
No relationship or nothing you just want to have sex with her?

In my opinion, you're* being a bit of a twat.

Well, that's men for you.

Like I already said, I'm probably not going to bone her.

That's what they all say

Let's just say her parents are also there.
Not banging this chick.

 

[xavi]

Might as well duder. It's always nice to see what could have been, then when it doesn't work out you do indeed get closure and if it does...then you def made the right choice yeah? &to everybody talking about him boning her...if she's going to have him spend the night at her house and it is a consensual thing, then that's between and up to the two of them. Not escapists

 

[hyperhammy]

Might as well duder. It's always nice to see what could have been, then when it doesn't work out you do indeed get closure and if it does...then you def made the right choice yeah? &to everybody talking about him boning her...if she's going to have him spend the night at her house and it is a consensual thing, then that's between and up to the two of them. Not escapists

Thanks! But if I don't want to hear someones opinion I wouldn't publish this in a forum.
No sex though! ^^

 

[hyperhammy]

No rejects, so yes go for it.

You just want to fuck her?
No relationship or nothing you just want to have sex with her?

In my opinion your being a bit of a twat.

Men are such pigs aye.

We need sex to feel loved, women need to feel loved to have sex, its not our fault.

Well I'm planning to do it the other way around.
I just want to make her feel loved without sex.

 

[Czargent Sane]

I dont understand, but I am inclined to say no

if you were both in love then you DID have something. if you dont want a serious relationship then why would you? hell, why would you stay with her? or resume contact?


did you just use the word closure to refer to this situation?

Yes, closure, because I really loved her and I was heartbroken when I had to leave.

Spoiler: *sigh*

You realise that if you "get it on" with her, you're going to feel like absolute shit when you leave, right?

Lusting over this woman, then leaving, was hard enough.

Now put sex in the equation and, BAMN, you don't want to leave.

I said it and I will say it again: NO SEX

I just don't want to feel like there could have been something. Like I did the last couple of years.

if this is true, maybe instead of editing the title of the thread you should edit the part that says "get it on" because that MEANS SEX

 

[hyperhammy]

I dont understand, but I am inclined to say no

if you were both in love then you DID have something. if you dont want a serious relationship then why would you? hell, why would you stay with her? or resume contact?


did you just use the word closure to refer to this situation?

Yes, closure, because I really loved her and I was heartbroken when I had to leave.

Spoiler: *sigh*

You realise that if you "get it on" with her, you're going to feel like absolute shit when you leave, right?

Lusting over this woman, then leaving, was hard enough.

Now put sex in the equation and, BAMN, you don't want to leave.

I said it and I will say it again: NO SEX

I just don't want to feel like there could have been something. Like I did the last couple of years.

if this is true, maybe instead of editing the title of the thread you should edit the part that says "get it on" because that MEANS SEX

What should I call it then?

 

[Czargent Sane]

I dont understand, but I am inclined to say no

if you were both in love then you DID have something. if you dont want a serious relationship then why would you? hell, why would you stay with her? or resume contact?


did you just use the word closure to refer to this situation?

Yes, closure, because I really loved her and I was heartbroken when I had to leave.

Spoiler: *sigh*

You realise that if you "get it on" with her, you're going to feel like absolute shit when you leave, right?

Lusting over this woman, then leaving, was hard enough.

Now put sex in the equation and, BAMN, you don't want to leave.

I said it and I will say it again: NO SEX

I just don't want to feel like there could have been something. Like I did the last couple of years.

if this is true, maybe instead of editing the title of the thread you should edit the part that says "get it on" because that MEANS SEX

What should I call it then?

call what? just dont use the words GET IT ON in fact, you should probably stay away from the word GET entirely.

 

[JanatUrlich]

Dude, why no sex?!??!

 

[hyperhammy]

Dude, why no sex?!??!

I don't know. Guess we aren't ready yet for something like that. At least I'm not ready for sex. It's more important to me to bond on an emotional level.

 

[JanatUrlich]

Dude, why no sex?!??!

I don't know. Guess we aren't ready yet for something like that. At least I'm not ready for sex. It's more important to me to bond on an emotional level.

But I thought you said that you didn't want a relationship?? Emotions and bonding is a relationship I'm afraid!

 

[Jaranja]

You just want to fuck her?
No relationship or nothing you just want to have sex with her?

In my opinion, you're* being a bit of a twat.

Well, that's men for you.

Like I already said, I'm probably not going to bone her.

That's what they all say

Let's just say her parents are also there.
Not banging this chick.

So what do you plan on doing, then?

In fact, how old are you?

 

[hyperhammy]

Dude, why no sex?!??!

I don't know. Guess we aren't ready yet for something like that. At least I'm not ready for sex. It's more important to me to bond on an emotional level.

But I thought you said that you didn't want a relationship?? Emotions and bonding is a relationship I'm afraid!

Guess it is a relationship, but it's probably only going to be serious for a week. I want to make sure she knows that this is only a summer thing, or whenever I can come visit her.

 

[BonsaiK]

I spend a couple years in America and met this really great girl. After seeing her a couple times I had to move back to Germany. After 5 years of no contact I found her on Facebook. Now we chat a lot and we are really getting along. I mean REALLY getting along. Now I'm going visit some friends this summer and I'm staying at her house for a couple of days.

The question is, should I try getting closer to her? I'm not looking for a serious relationship but it would finally lead to some closure, since we never actually had something, even though we were both in love with each other.

No sex, just a summer fling.

I read some of the replies and I guess it is kind of a relationship. =)

I've answered your question in the Relationship Problem thread, at the following link: ---->
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161-Relationship-problem-thread?page=40#7058375

 

[hyperhammy]

You just want to fuck her?
No relationship or nothing you just want to have sex with her?

In my opinion, you're* being a bit of a twat.

Well, that's men for you.

Like I already said, I'm probably not going to bone her.

That's what they all say

Let's just say her parents are also there.
Not banging this chick.

So what do you plan on doing, then?

In fact, how old are you?

I'm not planning anything. I just want to go with the flow.
I'm 15. ^^

 

[VanityGirl]

When I think fling, I think sex. If you want to have just a little fling, then you want casual sex.
If you and the girl had a thing before, then there will be no such thing as casual sex.

I would say that you should not go with your plan, a I can only see things going badly.

 

[fletch_talon]

I spend a couple years in America and met this really great girl. After seeing her a couple times I had to move back to Germany. After 5 years of no contact I found her on Facebook. Now we chat a lot and we are really getting along. I mean REALLY getting along. Now I'm going visit some friends this summer and I'm staying at her house for a couple of days.

The question is, should I get it on with her? I'm not looking for a serious relationship but it would finally lead to some closure, since we never actually had something, even though we were both in love with each other.

No sex, just a summer fling.

I read some of the replies and I guess it is kind of a relationship. =)

I suggest editing your post.
You keep insisting you don't want to have sex but you specifically use the term "get it on" which refers to sex its confusing people.

My advice. No. There is no reason to hold hands/kiss/cuddle/be generally romantic, when you have already decided its not going to go anywhere.
Sex can be fun and games and doesn't necessarily require any long term relationship to follow. Romance is different, romance is supposed to be long term (at least in intent).

Basically I foresee this going badly if you do have a "fling". Love and lust are very similar, and they're not mutually exclusive, but there is a difference. Lust can be satisfied with a fling. Love isn't like that, there's no switch (criteria) that just turns it off, feelings linger and emotions get hurt in the process.

 

[Spinozaad]

Sorry to be a blunt, jaded fellow, but:

Why bother when it's only for a few weeks, without sex?

If it were just for the pootang, I'd say 'go with it'. If else: no. Not worth your time. Just have fun. Don't create delusional fantasies of a summer fling with someone in a different country without orgasm.

 

[Jaranja]

You just want to fuck her?
No relationship or nothing you just want to have sex with her?

In my opinion, you're* being a bit of a twat.

Well, that's men for you.

Like I already said, I'm probably not going to bone her.

That's what they all say

Let's just say her parents are also there.
Not banging this chick.

So what do you plan on doing, then?

In fact, how old are you?

I'm not planning anything. I just want to go with the flow.
I'm 15. ^^

You want to do her though, right?

 

[hyperhammy]

Is sex the only thing that's important to you people?!
Weren't you ever young, or had a crush on a girl? Sex isn't everything.