Poll: Bullies..ahem, why?

[WilliamWhite1]

I'm not proud of what I once did, but back in my East LA days, I called the shots in who was picked on, even if it was only from late middle school to early high school. I'll go with what the first respondent said -- sadism. It strangely felt good, and I'll never know why. Heck, we bullied people bigger than we were.

As I said, not necessarily proud, but can't deny that it was somehow satisfying to do what we did.

 

[slyywiskers]

one guy did bully me once... then i punched him in the face

 

[slyywiskers]

I was bullied in 1st grade, kicked the kids ass, had no more problems. Then me and my family moved, it started all over again. Ended up kicking another bullies ass and all was well once more. Everyone gets bullied one time or another, you just need to learn that its ok to defend yourself.

pretty much same with me although its the same place, differnt schools same guy

 

[fulano]

Hmmm.

People here seem to have kind of solved their problems by direct fist to face contact a lot. Should've tried it myself. Too bad I was just too damn scared, but I made up for it in highschool though it involved no punching, but rather death threats of one angry bully.

People kind of thought I was an asshole and left me alone.

 

[InvisibleMilk]

I used to be bullied alot when I was younger, because I would let people take advantage of me because I was so friendly. Then, I hit puberty. Hell Yeah. Some time around Middle School, I got my friends and I to gang up on bullies in the hallways. We'd find a kid, usually one we wouldn't even look twice to see what he was doing, would be picked on. I'd give the bully 2 chances before I pulled him off the kid. If he threw a punch or a kick, we'd be all over his ass like ants on a picnic. Needless to say, I had conquered my fears. I got one major bully in our school to leave and the rest didn't seem to bother me anymore.

 

[Aschenkatza]

Why bully?
Because most of us were bullied in the first place.

 

[Dommyboy]

Poll needs options of "Both" and "Neither".

I've gone through it all. Life can be quite shit with it.

 

[fulano]

Why no Neither/Both options?

I may have been lightly teased and I may have joined in on teasing this kid in primary/grade school, but no one ever got physical with me, nor did I with anyone...

I said so early. but I'll say it again: I was dumb.

Honestly, be the way people are responding, I get it that I was hasty when putting up the poll. I should have added "neither" and "both" to the respective options. I'll be more careful next time I make a poll.

 

[Sweep117]

Why no Neither/Both options?

I agree. That option should be there. I would've chosen it.

I chose Bullied but only because of a few run ins I had with this one kid at a church kids group. Every Wednesday I'd go to this thing and every time, as all the kids are waiting to be picked up, this one kid would punch me in the face. Spilt blood a few times too. I don't know how long this went on but it wasn't for too long. My dad was (and still is) the pastor and I think he spoke to that kid's father.

Now that dude is the best friend I've ever had. Never would've expected that...

Edit: Sorry unabomberman... You ninja'd me. I wouldn't have mentioned the Neither/Both option thing if I had seen that.

 

[likalaruku]

Hmm, I think I was the only girl-bully in elementry school. At the time, I believed that I was the only person in the world who actualy existed & that therefore was the only person who could feel or form legitimate opinions. Somewhere around highschool when I STOPPED taking medication & therapy, I learned that the world dosen't revolve around me.

 

[megapenguinx]

Wow am I the only one that was both?

 

[tthor]

i was the bullied, but i also was the avenger. if some1 was bullying me or some1 else, i would stand up to them, and if they do not back down, beat them down. i did not enjoy others pain, but i guess i felt it was nesicary, to show them why they should not be bullying others, verbally or physically.(tho i should say, 'fights' around here arent that bad as someplaces, like fullout fistfights or anything,)

.. tho i admit, at 1 point i think i had near become a bully myself, when i had first switched to a new school in 8th grade.. it was much larger than my older skool, with probably over 10 times the students.. at my old school, the assholes and bullys mostly new better than to push me, because i would push back just as hard. but at this school, with so many students, and so many assholes, it was near impossible to simply make an example of 1 or 2 bullies, so i ended up getting into many more fights than in most school years. i think it was around that time that i gained that thirst for blood, and truly began to enjoy fighting assholes. many days i almost hoped some1 would so much as give me a reason to punch them,
but then highschool came, and i matured past the 'stupid juniorhigh' years, as well as most of those assholes in the school, so i havent gotten into a [actual] fight since then
(..tho i still enjoy murdering ppl in my imagination throughout the horrid day >:] )

 

[JCTiger]

I was a bit of both. Back in primary school, I was bullied by a group of guys, all of which were much larger than me. Come high school, I toughened up, but didn't actually grow any bigger. I carved myself a niche as the "Guy who knows everything and can outwit you by farting", and learned how to turn a crowd to my side.

Now I know jujutsu, nobody messes with me. Also, I shaved half my head for a fundraiser

 

[Echolocating]

With my kid starting Kindergarten soon, I had a talk with my wife about being bullied and such. It's a terrible thing. However, I remember one day I became a bully for about one minute during a recess period on the playground in grade 2. That moment is ingrained in my head quite clearly because I remember how awful I felt immediately afterward. It was just a name calling, but it was done in the midst of a group of about 5 others against one boy. I can still see his face, and I remember very little (except for being bullied) from my early grade school days.

After that I really withdrew from my peers and in the process became extremely anti-aggressive. I was a tall kid who didn't stand up for himself throughout the majority of school and that made me a target for bullies from all walks of life. (You know, because it looks very impressive to pick on a big kid.) It was hell. Most of the time, I would sit in class with my head down on my desk literally shaking with anger, imagining the bullies getting beat up in the most horrific manners. I'd replay these images over and over in my mind to the point where looking back now, I'm a little surprised I didn't snap.

I was a coward. The handful of times that I stood up for myself always ended badly for the other boy, yet I never developed the confidence to defend myself at all times. I suppose it's because most of the abuse was mental though. (It's hard to justify punching someone for calling you names, I guess.) Anyway, only when pushed, where "flight" wasn't an option, would I retaliate. Groups of bullies were the worst.

But, I'm glad I've gone through what I have (what doesn't kill us, I suppose) because I'm genuinely concerned for my child in this regard. I will be there for him, every step of the way. I will instill the confidence he needs to defend himself and I will discipline him in a very direct manner if I ever find out he's bullying another. There's no excuse for that sort of behavior. None.

Parents typically only get concerned when their child is being bullied, but what about when their child is the bully? That's what angers me the most; the parents in seemingly non-dysfunctional families who are completely ignorant to their child's destructive behavior.

 

[Calamity]

I've been the shortest male in every school I've ever gone to. Needless to say I've had my share of crap thrown at me.
Don't get me wrong though, as much as it seemed like an injustice at the time I deserved every bit of it looking back. Being a smart ass and saying everything that comes to mind is not a good way to get along with society.

 

[fulano]

With my kid starting Kindergarten soon, I had a talk with my wife about being bullied and such. It's a terrible thing. However, I remember one day I became a bully for about one minute during a recess period on the playground in grade 2. That moment is ingrained in my head quite clearly because I remember how awful I felt immediately afterward. It was just a name calling, but it was done in the midst of a group of about 5 others against one boy. I can still see his face, and I remember very little (except for being bullied) from my early grade school days.

After that I really withdrew from my peers and in the process became extremely anti-aggressive. I was a tall kid who didn't stand up for himself throughout the majority of school and that made me a target for bullies from all walks of life. (You know, because it looks very impressive to pick on a big kid.) It was hell. Most of the time, I would sit in class with my head down on my desk literally shaking with anger, imagining the bullies getting beat up in the most horrific manners. I'd replay these images over and over in mind to the point where looking back now, I'm a little surprised I didn't snap.

I was a coward. The handful of times that I stood up for myself always ended badly for the other boy, yet I never developed the confidence to defend myself at all times. I suppose it's because most of the abuse was mental though. (It's hard to justify punching someone for calling you names, I guess.) Anyway, only when pushed, where "flight" wasn't an option, would I retaliate. Groups of bullies were the worst.

But, I'm glad I've gone through what I have (what doesn't kill us, I suppose) because I'm genuinely concerned for my child in this regard. I will be there for him, every step of the way. I will instill the confidence he needs to defend himself and I will discipline him in a very direct manner if I ever find out he's bullying another. There's no excuse for that sort of behavior. None.

Parents typically only get concerned when their child is being bullied, but what about when their child is the bully? That's what angers me the most; the parents in seemingly non-dysfunctional families who are completely ignorant to their child's destructive behavior.

Rock on, man. I was actually always curoius about that kind of mindset; about how would the bully/bullied approach the issue from a parenting standpoint.

I wish you the best of luck with your kid. I don't know you, but you seem to have your head genuinely in the right place, and hopefuly he/she will do just fine.

 

[Sewblon]

It doesn't take much to push my buttons so I got into fights with and tormented both kids who wear bigger than me and kids who wear smaller than me. Growing up I was shy and always found a way to get upset or overreact to the worst possible things at the least opportune moment. I got bullied and also bullied other kids more than was normal for other kids. My childhood was wild.