Poll: Cousin Lovin'

[Varrdy]

As someone who's not exactly a prude and if there would be no repercussions then I'd say "Yes, I would". Otherwise I would have to vote "Maybe" because I know it would come with a lot of baggage.

I know a lot of people's immediate response would be "Ewww gross!" but that's usually more a case of societal programming and natural instinct more than anything, in most cases. I can understand the response though, I really can although the kneejerk aspect of it can kinda annoy me.

It would be frowned upon, of course and you'd be daft not to expect it but as long as no-one's getting hurt / coerced / forced then I really can't see the problem. Sure you might want to take precautions because there could be any number of problems faced by the child, which just isn't fair to the kid. However, contraception's so easy to get hold of these days there's no real excuse.

Legality is also an issue when it comes to siblings but, in the UK at least, you're legally allowed to marry your cousin if you are so inclined. It all boils down to wether you can cope with the expected and not entirely unwarranted wave of disapproval.

What annoys me is how the immediate perception of incest is that it's repulsive and criminal. Sure Josef Fritzl is an absolute demon and deserves to rot in hell with a burning spike up his arse but I know several folk who have confided to sexual interaction (on several levels) with close relatives and it's all good. No-one got hurt and they're not drooling hillbillies or crazy mountain hermits. No, seriously, they have cars, good teeth, iPhones and everything!

While I don't have any siblings, I have a lot of cousins and, of the female ones, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't had naughty thoughts about them!

Wardy

 

[Azure Sky]

Simple question is simple.
Would you date a close relative?

First cousin ? definitely not, what are we? back to the 11th century ?

It's legal in many U.S. States and in several other countries I can think of?

And also practiced if my not so great memory is recalling correctly, albeit not so much in 'westernized' society.

 

[Mrrrgggrlllrrrg]

Would I date a blood relative? Simply put no.

I won't say its gross and wrong but I wont say it's right either.
Also I won't lie, I have not done a ton of research on this particular topic.

We as children are taught and shaped through societal norms and whats accepted as a whole. I'm pretty sure back in history close relatives forming these relationships were either accepted or tolerated in many parts of the world. When exactly did it become a general taboo I do not know but if it can be helped I'm at least 70% sure it involves the evolution of society. Either way what I do know is that in many parts of western society a relationship of this type with lead to ostracization or public mockery. About genetic defects, dont quote me on what I'm saying as truth, I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that the chance of an incest relationship producing is only 1-2% higher than a similar non-related couple, but I might be wrong until I can fish it up.

In my point of view I dont care, if there are some twins who got seperated, or not, at birth and fell for eachother then honestly I just don't care.

EDIT: I jst read a few comments on legality, in the US to the best of my knowledge you cannot get married to first cousins, second cousins you can in a few states.

 

[Broken Boy]

Never thought about it much. But what ever makes people happy I say do it.

 

[Outright Villainy]

No, I never could. It wouldn't sit right with me in way, shape or form.
I'm not going to judge you if you do though, to each their own and all that. I think the OP said that they weren't blood related either. I still probably wouldn't, but really there's nothing wrong with him if we wants to date a non-blood relative. Nothing at all.

 

[Azure Sky]

Simple question is simple.
Would you date a close relative?

First cousin ? definitely not, what are we? back to the 11th century ?

It's legal in many U.S. States and in several other countries I can think of?

There's a few in the US. Question is, do you care enough about society to be affected by how people react to it? I haven't thought about it, as I haven't any female cousins that I'd ever consider to be date-able (age), but, unless it's illegal, I see no issue with it beyond MAYBE social stigma.

On that note, social stigma tends to change on a whim, so I wouldn't take what society says to heart for the most part.

While I will admit I skim-read most of the thread, this is probably one of the best things said here. And I totally agree as most things today are not 'what is right by law' but rather 'what is right by public acceptance'.

 

[Spinozaad]

No.

Not because it's inherently wrong, because it isn't. But because I'm not attracted to my cousin.

 

[amucha98]

.

 

[Actual]

As someone who's not exactly a prude and if there would be no repercussions then I'd say "Yes, I would". Otherwise I would have to vote "Maybe" because I know it would come with a lot of baggage.

I know a lot of people's immediate response would be "Ewww gross!" but that's usually more a case of societal programming and natural instinct more than anything, in most cases. I can understand the response though, I really can although the kneejerk aspect of it can kinda annoy me.

It would be frowned upon, of course and you'd be daft not to expect it but as long as no-one's getting hurt / coerced / forced then I really can't see the problem. Sure you might want to take precautions because there could be any number of problems faced by the child, which just isn't fair to the kid. However, contraception's so easy to get hold of these days there's no real excuse.

Legality is also an issue when it comes to siblings but, in the UK at least, you're legally allowed to marry your cousin if you are so inclined. It all boils down to wether you can cope with the expected and not entirely unwarranted wave of disapproval.

What annoys me is how the immediate perception of incest is that it's repulsive and criminal. Sure Josef Fritzl is an absolute demon and deserves to rot in hell with a burning spike up his arse but I know several folk who have confided to sexual interaction (on several levels) with close relatives and it's all good. No-one got hurt and they're not drooling hillbillies or crazy mountain hermits. No, seriously, they have cars, good teeth, iPhones and everything!

While I don't have any siblings, I have a lot of cousins and, of the female ones, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't had naughty thoughts about them!

Wardy

Just quoting you because I agree with you and you obviously put some thought into your post. That deserves recognition.

Unfortunately I suffer from the same initial response as most on this thread,upon reading the OP I thought; "ewww gross".

A split second later and I'm realising I don't know why I feel that way, there is no reason why cousins couldn't date once in a blue moon so it didn't mess with the family's genetics.

The problem you'd face would be that the bulk of society would not accept it and personally I'd not think it worth the trouble.

 

[Daveman]

Me and my friend had this discussion and we decided once you get to second cousin it's technically lright and most birth defects will probably be not a problem. So date a cousin? No.

However Darwin, the man who taught us about hybrid vigour, married his cousin. So I don't know what to think.

 

[Arcanite Ripper]

Umm, not really.

As far as I know, "incestry" (Or rather the actions that might promote it, as implied from the thread title/original post) isn't too well recieved by most general publics, either the apperent couple or the rest of the world onlooking.

...Why yes; there are many different plausible replies to my opinionated observance, though for a simple answer to a simple question I do not want to go into any further detail.

>.>

 

[The Ambrosian]

I think it's weird now, but I don't really have many relatives nevermind ones I'm close too. But if I did, and I got really close to them. And thought I loved them then I guess i'd think differently. It depends if you're in the situation or not.

 

[BiscuitTrouser]

The only reason people think its gross is because society tells you it is. Its called indoctrination. You are told it is wrong so many times that you believe it wih the utmost conviction and will persecute those who disagree. For no reason other than your inability to ask why?

That said the indoctrination has got me to and i have to say i personally wouldnt but i wouldnt jugde someone who did iether.

I dunno if this has been said, but I remember reading somewhere that blood cousins have kids with the same risk of abnormalities as any non-related couple.

Either way: hell no I wouldn't.

This is true, i learnt this in A level biology. The risk is very sligthtly higher and can only occur if your family has a history of defects or genetic illnesses.

 

[Azure Sky]

I dunno if this has been said, but I remember reading somewhere that blood cousins have kids with the same risk of abnormalities as any non-related couple.

Either way: hell no I wouldn't.

This is true, i learnt this in A level biology. The risk is very sligthtly higher and can only occur if your family has a history of defects or genetic illnesses.

I had a suspicion that this was the case.

But as you also said, the general public will believe what the higher ups tell them, true or not.

 

[Trivun]

First cousin or closer, then no. But genetically speaking, every human is related to every other human. And I don't mean by the whole 'Adam and Eve' thing, I mean scientifically speaking. For example, correct me if this is wrong but something like several hundred million people or something in Europe or related by blood to the Emperor Constantine or something, because of how many kids he had. Pretty much every European nobleman is related by blood or marriage thanks to all the mix-and-match marriages the royal families used to have. And adding migration and inter-breeding between different races and ethnic groups, overall it's likely that everyone is already related to everyone. The next person to quote me on this is probably something like my ninety-eighth cousin thirteen times removed or something, and neither of us know it.

This isn't to excuse incest or anything, though admittedly I don't see anything wrong with incest aside from the genetic concerns regarding children. Incest is a way of life in some cultures, by modern standards it's pretty wrong but that's just our own way of looking at it and in certain tribes and cultures it's perfectly normal to marry your cousin or sister or brother or whatever.

As far as I'm concerned, I would simply just choose not to do anything sexual or romantic with my close family or cousin or anything. However, anything more distant than a cousin, then why the hell not? And I challenge people now to give a proper reason for that, not just "urgh, that's disgusting!".

When I was a little kid, around seven or eight, I used to play kiss-chase with my second cousin, who was a year older than me. Now, I've only seen her once in the past five-six years or so, and that was in a chance meeting in a shopping centre with her mother and our mutual grandmother (who I was shopping with). WE said hi, chatted briefly, then went our seperate ways. In addition, I met another second cousin, a girl the same age as me, at my great-uncle's (her grandfather's) funeral at the end of last year. We got on fairly well, and I'll be completely honest, I did find her attractive. If I hadn't known we were related at all, and the occasion had been less sombre, then I possibly would have considered flirting with her.

A challenge for anyone who has read this post, or even those who've just skipped straight to the bottom because of the 'pretty bold text'. If you disagree with relationships between people who are further than cousins, i.e. related as second cousins or more distant, then explain why? Without complaining that it's just disgusting. Give proper reasons why it's so wrong. Don't talk about your feelings about close family, because that's irrelevant in this case, but for second cousins or further, why do you feel that way?

 

[Life_Is_A_Mess]

No. No. No. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. No.

 

[drdamo]

If you both want it and you both love eachother i'd say go for it.
True love knows no boundaries.

Be adviced that this isn't exactly a good thing for genetics/human evolution in general if both are blood-related and you are considering offspring.

And religion wise... well i'm not gonna bother explaining the problems you encounter there, being an atheist myself.

 

[Varrdy]

Just quoting you because I agree with you and you obviously put some thought into your post. That deserves recognition.

Unfortunately I suffer from the same initial response as most on this thread,upon reading the OP I thought; "ewww gross".

A split second later and I'm realising I don't know why I feel that way, there is no reason why cousins couldn't date once in a blue moon so it didn't mess with the family's genetics.

The problem you'd face would be that the bulk of society would not accept it and personally I'd not think it worth the trouble.

It's a fair and honest reason to hold back, it's why I voted "maybe" rather than an outright "yes". As with everything, there would be consequences and I am not good at dealing with them at the best of times.

Wardy

 

[Red Albatross]

Society and its "taboos" change every time it's convenient to forget the past, so the "social norm" and other garbage psycho-babble ideas like that can fuck right off.

I was never close to my extended family, so that probably plays a huge part in this, but I have some pretty hot cousins that I might consider hooking up with, given the chance. If you're into her and she's into you, stick it in.

 

[MicrosoftPaysMe]

I'm trying to think of a personal example but no I don't have any cousins that I would ever have sex with. I've thought my cousin was pretty, I'd even go as far to say that I may have felt attracted to her for a moment or two, but I would never, ever act on that.

EDIT: I feel like I'm in the majority with my values