Poll: Do you want an apology?

[Sansha]

At my High School, one of the kids that bullied me died in a car crash. Remember hearing about it through the grapevine of other students. Caught it on the news. He was drunk and plowed into a tree. I didn't care that he was dead. Eventually I was going to have to fight him, this kind of stopped it. Alot of other kids he bullied as well.

My former high-school bully had his dreams crushed, turned alcoholic and went to jail for beating his girlfriend, and hung himself in a cell. Justice, as far as I'm concerned.

On topic - actually yes. I recently had someone who seriously wronged me a couple of years ago apologize... and it actually made me feel a whole lot better.

You'd be surprised that an apology can do.

 

[Wolfeyes555]

Hm... now that is a good question.

I was bullied pretty bad back in Elementary but was left mostly alone during my Jr. High and High School years. Since I lived in a fairly small town, I did end up going to High School with the people who bullied me however we didn't talk to each other much.

Now would I have liked an apology from them? I suppose I'd accept it if they did end up apologizing to me, but the thing I'd probably want more is finding out that they realized they were wrong and turned their life around for the better.

 

[Alcamonic]

Now why would I even want an apology from shitheads who does not know the mere definition of the word...

Actions of the past shaped and molded me into what I am today. Will I suddenly spring forth and become some sort of super social butterfly who only see joy in the world? No? Then I will continue with the monkeysphere world I have created which only a select few is apart of.

I am alive, I imagine some of them are not (not my doing should that be the case, as much as I wish it were).
I am almost grateful, countless hours of practicing the art of hiding emotions, thinking and analyzing information more than a person probably should at any given time has increased my problem solving skill and resourcefulness.

Sadly, as much as I want to become a Punicher or sorts, a realistic Batman of our time and society, I would get locked in and get medical treatment for being the one person who actually show the world how rotten it is and try to do something about it.

Swedish "justice" system is a joke. Since my fundings and social connections are limited I have to rely on someone else becoming a strong leader that can cleans out the weed of our much rotten society. No, you don't get 2 years of jail (which is more like 1 year because "good behaviour") for murdering someone. You don't get medical treatment for 4 years in a minimum security prison. If found guilty by strong evidence and in a more realistic court and law system you fucking DIE.

Call me a "fascist asshole" and "this is how WW2 started, you shit prick" if you must. Is it really more humane not killing people so they can kill others by them selves? That's not justice, that's retardation and gullible thinking that people become "cured" by doing a couple of years time.

/rant

Thanks for me, that felt better getting it out of my system.

 

[Raikas]

I don't have personal experience to add, but the wife of a friend of mine actually recently had someone who bullied her when they were kids (12-13 or so, I gather) and she appreciated it. But this is 20 years later, so it wasn't fresh for her - I think she would probably have been more aggressive about it if it were closer to the moment, you know?

 

[DugMachine]

Nope. I moved on after middle/high school and never looked back. What bullying I experienced was so shallow and forgettable that I can't even remember instances of said bullying. Sure, I have self image issues but that was mostly brought on by being overweight and trying to date girls, not bullies teasing me.

To me, unless you were physically beaten on a weekly basis, I don't understand all the trauma from verbal insults. They really are just words that go in one ear and out the other. As a kid you're not mature enough to handle it yeah but now that I'm older I laugh at how much of a wuss I must have been. Just nut up and tell the bullies to fuck off.

 

[DSK-]

No. I'd rather the option to stab them in the face.

 

[Headdrivehardscrew]

The best apology was to feel their hot tears and blood trickle all over my clenched fists while I was choking them to oblivion.

Apart from these very few instances, I stick to the plan of turning the other cheek.

 

[Aeshi]

I'd much rather have revenge instead, preferably in the form of said bully's loved ones being raped, roasted alive in front of him and then ending with him being force-fed their remains until his digestive system gives out.

 

[raankh]

some of them are now my friends.

 

[Diddy_Mao]

Emotionally I don't really care. I've moved on as have my bullies. While a heartfelt apology would not be turned down I don't hang my happiness on it.

Physically. If they're willing to pay for the chiroptactic sessions and probable shoulder surgury I would require to recover from some of their more spirited bullying that would also be welcome...but I shant hold my breath.

I can't in good faith tell others to "get over it" because I know full well how emotionally damaging a childhood of bullying can be.

 

[Nokturos]

I'd rather just beat the living shit out of them. Don't really care for apologies from idiots, sincere or not.

 

[Troublesome Lagomorph]

No. I really, really don't care anymore.

 

[boradam]

If I was ever bullied, I never realized it. Apologies are nice, but even if I never realized I was being bullied, I can forgive them if I ever realize I was even without an apology.

 

[Cheesy Goodness]

I had a bully that messed with me all through high school. It was for the dumbest reason that we even got on bad terms with each other. I had just moved and started going to a new school during my freshman year.

He mentioned on my first day that I was a fairly "big" guy and suggested I join the football team. I'm not sure what he was talking about, as I was about as thin as a bean pole. I told him that it didn't interest me in the slightest, and this somehow offended him or something. He bullied me everyday in one class together since then.

I finally had enough one day and had it out for him. We exchanged a few punches, but nothing changed whatsoever. He bullied me the next year too, because I was wearing a heavy metal shirt he didn't much care for. I had two classes with him that year, and the teachers were either oblivious or didn't care. It makes me a tad angry to reflect on those feelings again, and I doubt an apology would solve anything.

I found out in my mid 20s that he was a homosexual and ended up having a very serious gay relationship. He had a MySpace page that contained some very lewd photos. It all kind of makes sense now that I think about it. Were I to meet him now, I would probably tell him to leave the past well enough alone and leave me be. I'm a few weeks from getting my second belt in Krav Maga and took a year of Brazilian Jiujitsu classes. Not only that, but I'm in the best shape of my life. I know that I could severely hurt him if I wanted, and that thought alone gives me enough satisfaction.

 

[XMark]

I'd much rather just never see past bullies again. It's a waste of time to even think of 'em.

 

[Trueflame]

Definitely not. People move on, and bullies and their victims certainly don't stay friends and remain in contact, so why bring things up, dredge up the past, just to apologize when you're never going to see each other or interact again? It's pointless and a waste of time, and just a way for the former bully to feel better about him/herself. If someone in such a situation feels sorry, then they should channel those emotions toward becoming a better person, not asking for forgiveness for things long forgotten.

 

[GoaThief]

One of the things that I've taken from this thread is that some bullied people have turned into absolute monsters, far far worse than their former bullies ever were. To see such a widespread lack of basic humanity is quite sickening to say the least.

 

[zidine100]

i dont care, mostly because it wasn't that bad and i Wouldn't know who to ask to be quite honest, if someone tried to apologize out of the blue, i more than likely wouldn't know who that was.

 

[RaikuFA]

I'd like to but I doubt the school would admit that they hired/encouraged bullying.

CAPTCHA: usual suspects. They're really not.