Poll: Does this make me a creeper?( please read entire thing before voting)

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NBSRDan

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Aug 15, 2009
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Leaving a note in her locker is a good idea to get around your anxiety, but making it anonymous- that's creepy.
 

Skinny_Ninja

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May 6, 2010
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If she thinks you're stupid then run with it I say. Ask her if she'd tutor you or something. Then you can get all the time in the world with her without her friends.
 

crypt-creature

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May 12, 2009
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It sounds like something that would be done on some tween drama/comedy show, to be honest. Don't do it.

Perhaps your own insecurity around her is what she picks up on. It seems like you're reading into things way too much, and without any sort of valid reason.
Like others have said, try saying 'hi' every so often or ask about assignments and what not.
 

Desgardes

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Apr 5, 2010
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I don't understand why people do this. Setting yourself on the outside of "normal" people is a fallacious attempt to make yourself special or keep yourself down. If you have a crush on this person, then get to know them. Have a conversation, maybe. You'd have to try pretty damn hard to make such a huge ass out of yourself that you can't redeem a situation. Neither you or her are unique enough to warrant any other method of courting than has worked for millenia. And if you can't summon a pair, then just chop 'em off and resign yourself to letting the crush die.

And I really don't get why anyone would come to a forum for this kind of advice, no matter how helpful and well meaning we can be for you. This is not something that should be decided by popular opinion.
 

Desgardes

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Apr 5, 2010
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Actual said:
Are you all ignoring the fact that this girl doesn't like him?

Any attention he pays her is going to be unwelcome.

Fight the battles you can win dude, don't waste your time with this girl.

And, yes your locker plan is totally stalker-like. If she finds out who's doing it,I wouldn't be surprised if she reports you for creepy harassment.
I was ignoring this fact, because it is more endemic of a mindset that predicates itself on self-sabotage. That is really the main goal of the thread, I think, correcting that.
 

ladiesman123

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May 23, 2010
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come on people hes a kid, hes young he does not know the ways of having game. no need to make him feel bad.

-btw your note idea would tell her that who ever wrote it(even if she dosnt kno its you) is to scarred to approach her, and not worthy of her.

social competence can be learned and im living proof.

read some self help books for good insight. also try thelayguide.com
 

Glerken

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Dec 18, 2008
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ladiesman123 said:
dont listen to anyone who says you cant get her.

YOU CAN! all you need is the right attitude.
As nice of a thought as this is, it's not true.

Regardless, If you're confident in yourself, you'll have a better shot. You don't sound like you're confident in yourself at all though. So until you are, you wont get her.

However, if you somehow still think your locker idea is a choice, allow me to stop that. No. Don't do it.
Creepy. As. Hell.
The best I can see that doing is getting you reported.
 

Malifact

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Apr 13, 2010
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marter" post="18.196627.6340389 said:
It's kind of a strange idea, and I doubt she'd actually go for it if she's as smart as you say she is.

The better idea is to practice what you want to say to her and then just go and talk with her. Then you can get to know her personally, giving you a better chance in the future.[/quote

He's said all that can be said.
 

Marmooset

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Mar 29, 2010
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jcb1337 said:
You are in fact an incompotent fucking dumbass. Ask her if she is attracted to you. Don't be afraid.

/thread
How does being the fifth person who says roughly the same thing qualify for a /thread?
 

Thaius

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Mar 5, 2008
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That's not very creeperish at all... it's on the maturity level of a jr. higher, but hardly creeperish.

If you like her, talk to her. Beating around the bush with anonymous notes isn't the best idea. Though if she doesn't like you and thinks you're an idiot, I'm not sure why you'd like her in the first place...
 

Ziadaine_v1legacy

Flamboyant Homosexual
Apr 11, 2009
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Either talk or write a letter, though the letter part is more of a cliche' female thing. Voice letters are a bit creepy, not you in person but I'd be a bit creeped if i found a voice record for me in a locker. It'd be like "Saw" all over again.

Of Topic: Damn we have too many Relationship threads lately...
 

Anthropaphagi

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May 6, 2010
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As a female who has had to deal with guys being odd and/or presumptive, DO NOT DO WHAT YOU'RE CONSIDERING. No one is interested in someone showing their interest via covert ops/subterfuge. You want to attract the ladies, not have them assume you're trying out for MI5 or the CIA.

1. If you're nervous, start small. Say hello when you see her. Work your way up to a proper conversation, but don't drag this on for ages. She'll think you're not interested in anything more than exchanging pleasantries and if you're inconsistent she may think you're a weirdo, at least I do when guys say hi one minute then ignore me the next time they see me.

2. ASSUME NOTHING. Again, this comes from my own personal experience. You don't know her, you don't know how she'll respond, you don't know what she's thinks of you. So don't assume that you do. When you do, you're the one that becomes the judgmental ass, particularly if you assume the worst of someone. I've never been flattered by someone saying, "I didn't say something sooner because I thought you'd think I was..." It's actually quite insulting.

3. Once you're comfortable, be direct and honest. Females are surprisingly responsive to both.

4. Subterfuge NEVER WORKS. Spying, sneaking, leaving messages, anything other than open communication can be construed a number of ways including: you're weird, you're a stalker, you're insecure, you're just screwing around for funsies/due to boredom. At the very least it results in mixed messages being sent, and again, will make her question your sanity as well as your motives and she is most likely not going to be amused. Especially if she's made to respond in kind, i.e. leaving messages. Not cool at all.

5. Failing to follow 1 and 3, in particular suggests to the ladies that you don't think she's worth the time or effort to be honest. Believe it or not, it comes across as half-assed, and insincere.

6. As I've said in other posts(you guys ask alot for a lot of relationship advice. :p), don't drag this on forever, even if she is interested she will lose interest particularly if you're doing odd things, and there are other males out there. Don't assume she's going to patiently wait around for you to put on your big boy pants and make a proper move.

Finally, I'm not saying you won't be declined, but at least you'll know once and for all. And the next time you can be a bit more confident in your approach. And there will be a next time. So if this falls through, move on to the next.
 

Alex The Rat

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Jan 8, 2010
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Hey, isn't it cool that you have someplace to come for generally decent and varied advice? Man, if I had been a member of the Escapist in high school I could have avoided all sorts of stupid shit!!

Officer Crayon said:
That's not being a creeper, it's wanting to get to know someone through unconventional means.

I managed to say something brilliant to a girl. I said ''I know what kind of laundry detergent you use. Purex 2x'' Needless to say she now thinks i stalk her, seeing as I also know where she lives...
Umm... bad advice/trolling?

RedMenace said:
Reality check: Start talking to her. Don't flirt, don't confess, don't try to engage in some meaningful conversation - just probe the waters with occasional small talk and see how she reacts. For starters - stop hiding behind the corner and just act normal around her, say "hi" occasionally, ask her about school related things if you're in the same class ("Sorry , what was the homework for ? I sort of missed when the teacher announced it."). Even if she will respond with disdain, there is still a possibility for being the "best enemies" (sort of Peter Parker and Flash Thompson deal). I for example still keep in contact with a few people who gave me shit in HS years and I gave them shit back.
Excellent advice. Also, by engaging her in conversation more often you may discover that she's not quite as cool as you thought, thereby solving this entire situation.

Finally, the biggest piece of advice I can give you is that you shouldn't try to be anything other than yourself. Don't ever say what you think she (or anybody else) WANTS to hear and definitely don't pretend. She'll either dislike you, like you as a friend and nothing more, or maybe even want to go out, and there's absolutely nothing you can do about her response to the person you are so just go with the flow :)
 

RN7

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Oct 27, 2009
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Marmooset said:
jcb1337 said:
You are in fact an incompotent fucking dumbass. Ask her if she is attracted to you. Don't be afraid.

/thread
How does being the fifth person who says roughly the same thing qualify for a /thread?
Because that's all that needs to be said. I'm the only one who decided to close it. I think, I'm not going through all these posts at 4:30 a.m.
 

Artina89

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Oct 27, 2008
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Talk to her. The plan that you have cooked up makes you sound like a stalker and not a way to engratiate herself to you. If you talk to her and she blows you off, big deal. It happens. Just move on.