Poll: Father in rural Germany finds his young son likes to wear dresses; does the same to show solidarity.
- Thread starter BiscuitTrouser
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I cant imagine anyone masculine looking good in a dress, not one I've ever seen atleast. Skirts are another thing though, Romans even made a kick ass military uniform that included one.
To make an omelette you have to break a few eggs.excalipoor said:
In explanation of my perhaps insane use of metaphor, it takes a few people making potentially retarded decisions to change how things are. I brought the past up to question the logic behind people saying they should prevent it: There is historical precedent for this kid to wear whatever the hell they like. Perhaps he will get bullied, perhaps he wont. Perhaps he will ask his dad why he gets bullied (If he does) and perhaps his fathers explanation will make him change what he is wearing.
I am not going to say a kilt or a wizards robe is the same thing. Course not. Although I did bring up national dress for a reason: If the kid was an Arab, people would not give a shit. Plus, when I was in that region, people did not give a shit when I wore a dishdasha, I was a little ginger kid, white as a ghost, and nobody cared. Perhaps that would be a more logical answer, buying the kid a dishdash (I am going to use that term if I say dishdasha again, it is a crappy anglicized version of the word anyway and that is another term for the item which is easier to type) cause a dishdash is as comfortable as a dress without the potential backlash from a boy dressing up as a girl.
I do not see why it is asking for trouble in the future. Quite the reverse. What if the kid is struggling from being trans? (Impossible to tell at that age, but what if?) if his father stamped down on it it could mean a hell of a lot of trouble when the kid grows up.
As it is you are right, nobody can tell if it is a boy or a girl, which could be to his favour for a while. But if the kid doesnt grow out of wearing a dress, more power to the dad for supporting him. And as for it not mattering what you or I think? I disagree.
Utterly.
Cause I am speaking as a dude. I identify as a dude. I assume you are speaking from the same point of view. If we address the issue and publicly state that there is nothing wrong with it, if people in the community in which the kid lives state that they have nothing wrong with it, another barrier between the genders goes down. Another wall between the genders is climbed. The world becomes a more equal, happy place.
Change starts with people being brave and people supporting those that are being brave.
I would make him stop. He is too young, he probably doesn't even understand what hes doing. Personally i don't care all that much what people wear, but once school starts that kid is gonna have a bad time if he continues wearing dresses. And yes, i know "blame the bully" and whatnot, but kids are stupid and even the teachers will think that hes odd and hes asking for it himself.
Very much yes. While I am very strongly supportive of going against gender roles, I will say that that dad, awesome as he is, should introduce his son to Kilts. While not Scottish in any way, as far as I can tell, it is a little less awkward, and hey, the kid could play as Braveheart. That could be really fun. Or really chaotic. Either way.Boudica said:Who cares? "Oh no, you shouldn't be wearing that bit of fabric that way!" Pfft. Some cultures are so painfully stupid.
But, more on topic, that dad is great. Showing solidarity with your son like that is basically one of the things EVERY father should do, in one way or another. That's being a supportive parent, and really, that dad is doing it right.
... However, that does not change the fact that that skirt looks absolutely godawful on that guy, and really, he could stand to use either a different KIND of skirt, or at the very least a more flattering color.
Yeah, we for sure need some nice dresses/skirts designed for dudes.Abandon4093 said:Just like womens suits are designed to flatter the female form, skirts and dresses for men would have to be designed to flatter the male form. I don't know how you'd start with that, but I'd imagine it would be a kind of 'Thobe' style design.
I'd be interested to see how they'd do it.
This is giving me the fear that one day my kids will look at pictures of me now the way I look at pictures of my mum in the 80's and think `Did you not know how flipping silly you looked?!`Abandon4093 said:
I tell ya this: I would rather wear a skirt than one of those girl-skinny-jeans.Moonlight Butterfly said:
Who else?excalipoor said:
What is the point in adults standing around and going "THIS IS TOTALLY OK" and silently judging the kids who agree?
Better that the kid just does what the kid does without being hindered by society. Then, when other kids start to emulate him, BAM, SUBVERSIVE SOCIAL CHANGE OUT OF THE BLUE.
The only people who can change what kids are allowed to wear are kids wearing whatever they want. You can stand on a pedestal and preach social change all you want, that kid is a little billboard for social change, one that walks, talks and wears what it likes. Better you give the kid and the dad all your support (If there was a way of doing so other then just posting online about how much you support them) then say "Well, Kids SHOULD be allowed to wear what they like, but we gotta stop them until we have fixed society and made it so they can".
Be the change you want to see.
Bacon.
So... much... win...
That's awesome that the dad would do that. However, he's going to have to teach his son about gender norms at some point. Although we might not like them, they are an integral part of society and understanding them is important, the same way understanding racism is important.
That's awesome that the dad would do that. However, he's going to have to teach his son about gender norms at some point. Although we might not like them, they are an integral part of society and understanding them is important, the same way understanding racism is important.
Hell yeah I would!BiscuitTrouser said:
You just made my day, BiscuitTrouser! That father is awesome, and I'd like to subscribe to his newsletter.
Women have been wearing men's clothes for the past fifty years or so - time to get some movement in the other direction.
No problem, this story really made me smile reading it and i wanted to share it with you guys.Bara_no_Hime said:
I know id explain what gender roles are and tell my son if he wants to wear one hes entitled to and he can wear whatever he pleases as long as it makes him happy. Id defend him, make him feel good about himself and be there for him. Could i do this? I have no idea. It takes an insane amount of guts to change the way you live for your kid, especially in a way you werent ever drawn to before. I just dont have any will to wear dresses. The father here is an example of what parenting is.
I doubt I would wear a dress alongside him, but I also don't really see any harm in letting him dress how he wants, especially at that age.
I do, however, think it's very important for a parent to teach their child what the expectations of "normal" society are. That's not to say that those expectations are always right or always to be obeyed lock step, but it's a mistake to pretend they don't exist. All that will do is cause the child undue distress in the future. It's better for the child to know beforehand, for example, that there are many people who will take issue with his wearing a dress than to have him come home devastated after he gets home from school on his first day due to comments from the other school children and possibly school staff as well.
I do, however, think it's very important for a parent to teach their child what the expectations of "normal" society are. That's not to say that those expectations are always right or always to be obeyed lock step, but it's a mistake to pretend they don't exist. All that will do is cause the child undue distress in the future. It's better for the child to know beforehand, for example, that there are many people who will take issue with his wearing a dress than to have him come home devastated after he gets home from school on his first day due to comments from the other school children and possibly school staff as well.
I'm 194cm and 95kg, and I'll guarantee that no-one will ever design a dress that would look good on me. I dare anyone to try!Abandon4093 said:
Someone less likely to be scarred for life from the backlash. But you're not going to convince me, and I'm pretty sure I'm not going to convince you, so...Mr F. said:
Bacon.Mr F. said:
What an awesome da. Makes me think of Richard O'Brien; I absolutely love the man.
I certainly think that people should wear whatever they want (within reason, without sounding too hypocritical. You know those short shorts that seem to be in fashion now? I... really don't want to see a 14-year-old's arse, thanks). However, to state the obvious, most clothes are made to cater for men or women. That is to say, to suit their figures or builds, for the most part. I hope I'm making sense, haha. Which is partially why I also agree with:
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Oh, by the bye, Ricky O'Brien:
I certainly think that people should wear whatever they want (within reason, without sounding too hypocritical. You know those short shorts that seem to be in fashion now? I... really don't want to see a 14-year-old's arse, thanks). However, to state the obvious, most clothes are made to cater for men or women. That is to say, to suit their figures or builds, for the most part. I hope I'm making sense, haha. Which is partially why I also agree with:
I do see where you're coming from.DugMachine said:
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Oh, by the bye, Ricky O'Brien: