I have heard of him he was a gay man and strong inforcer of fashion in around the 1890s but remember he was put into jail and died at an age of 46.letterbomber223 said:
Poll: Is it wrong to automatically assume some is heterosexual?
- Thread starter Aur0ra145
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You really shouldn't assume anything about anyone until you meet them and understand them. That being said, since the majority of people are hetero no it wouldn't be wrong.
I don't think it's wrong to assume that. It's just a matter of playing the odds. Most people are hetrosexual, therefore it's the first thing you expect. Automatically assuming someone is hetrosexual is like assuming they're right handed. It might not be true for everyone, but in most cases you'll be right. You just go with the numbers.
Never assume! Assuming makes an ass pirate out of u and me! To be safe, assume everyone is homosexual and trying to deceive you, much like Satan trolled Eve!
Being hetrosexual is the current social norm. There is nothing wrong with assuming something will conform with a social norm until proven otehrwise.
If we go down that road:
It's offensive to assume someone has a job because some people don't.
It's offensive to assume somebody likes ice cream because some people don't/are lactose intolerant.
It's offesnive to assume somebody doesn't mind if the door is held open for them, because some people don't.
Sexuality isn't the most open topic. I don't assume somebody is any sexuality until I have evidence to prove one way or the other. I know bisexuals and homosexuals. They usually don't take offence to assumptions.
When I met my friend who is now like a big sister, she had a boyfriend at the time and reffered to a girl as her girlfriend. Well, girlfriend could mean girlfriend, or just a girl who is a friend. I asked her if she meant like a friend. She responded by saying she meant actual girlfriend, and that she is bisexual. She had no problem with my inquiry.
In a perfect world, we wouldn't have such lables. It's to the point where men will try to avoid anything that might make them look gay because they are so defencive of their staightness. I guess if you were paranoid about not offending someone and couldn't tell what their sexuality was, you could just ask them what they prefer. You can even have some fun with it.
It's offensive to assume someone has a job because some people don't.
It's offensive to assume somebody likes ice cream because some people don't/are lactose intolerant.
It's offesnive to assume somebody doesn't mind if the door is held open for them, because some people don't.
Sexuality isn't the most open topic. I don't assume somebody is any sexuality until I have evidence to prove one way or the other. I know bisexuals and homosexuals. They usually don't take offence to assumptions.
When I met my friend who is now like a big sister, she had a boyfriend at the time and reffered to a girl as her girlfriend. Well, girlfriend could mean girlfriend, or just a girl who is a friend. I asked her if she meant like a friend. She responded by saying she meant actual girlfriend, and that she is bisexual. She had no problem with my inquiry.
In a perfect world, we wouldn't have such lables. It's to the point where men will try to avoid anything that might make them look gay because they are so defencive of their staightness. I guess if you were paranoid about not offending someone and couldn't tell what their sexuality was, you could just ask them what they prefer. You can even have some fun with it.
As a few others have said, yes it is wrong to presume.
If I'm interviewing candidates for a job and I know from past experience that most women don't have enough experience for the job, does that make it right to presume any woman applying can't be a good enough candidate, so dismiss her automatically?
Of course not. I can gain precise information easily just by asking and nothing is gained by presuming either way.
The same is true of someone sexuality, you gain nothing by presuming either way and, if you really must know, you can gain the information easily by asking, so why presume at all? If you presume, you're right 90% of the time, but if you don't presume at all, you're right 100%.
Yes, in life there are times when you have to make presumptions, otherwise things won't work out very well but this isn't one of those times. This is a time when the presumption is nothing but your own arrogance.
If I'm interviewing candidates for a job and I know from past experience that most women don't have enough experience for the job, does that make it right to presume any woman applying can't be a good enough candidate, so dismiss her automatically?
Of course not. I can gain precise information easily just by asking and nothing is gained by presuming either way.
The same is true of someone sexuality, you gain nothing by presuming either way and, if you really must know, you can gain the information easily by asking, so why presume at all? If you presume, you're right 90% of the time, but if you don't presume at all, you're right 100%.
Yes, in life there are times when you have to make presumptions, otherwise things won't work out very well but this isn't one of those times. This is a time when the presumption is nothing but your own arrogance.
No. People define the world in terms of the "self" and the "other." The self is things you identify with and that generally means people who look and, act and think like you. You will tend to project your notion of "self" onto others if you identify them as part of your group and have to fill in unspecified holes in their personality. (such as your probably straight so you assume most people you meet are to unless they do something to categorize themselves into the "gay" other category). As an interesting note: if you see two men together and obviously in a relationship do you automatically assume they are both gay? Did you consider one or both of them might be bisexual? isn't it odd that gay seems more prevalent in our mind then other non-straight groups?
It isn't wrong at all, but you should know better than to take an assumption and run with it.
Gotta be careful.
I've had an experience, 2 actually, with dudes i knew who i thought, FOR SURE, were gay.
They were just flamboyant.
Didn't get a chance to put my foot in my mouth though. Let my classmates do that for me.
Gotta be careful.
I've had an experience, 2 actually, with dudes i knew who i thought, FOR SURE, were gay.
They were just flamboyant.
Didn't get a chance to put my foot in my mouth though. Let my classmates do that for me.
